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I'm so tired of them


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I just need a place to vent. I don't get along with my parents but today has been unusually worse.

My dad told me that I would have to leave my cat behind when I move out and "just get a new one" which upset me for the whole day. He knows I love my cat and he just treats her like something disposable. Oh it's just a pet, you can just get a new one and it's all the same.

Then I found out that my mom tore out all my herbs in the garden without saying anything. I've been busy with school so I hadn't been out there since summer. I have no idea when she tore them out. She never said anything, never asked me if it was okay, never told me to cut them back. She just decided she didn't like it and ripped them all out without ever saying anything or caring about how I feel about it.

I feel like grabbing some of her teacups and smashing them on the floor so she understands what it's like when someone takes something of yours without your permission and destroys it. And she's done this before. She's done this a lot throughout my life. Whether it's clothes, toys, or furniture, she'll take it, throw it in the trash, and never say anything. She doesn't care if it's someone else's stuff, she doesn't like it so it goes in the trash without a word. It makes it impossible for me to trust her with anything. She'll also parrot anything I say back to her friends regardless of what kind of information it is.

Neither of them care about how the things they say or do affect other people. They're difficult people to live with.

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This breaks my heart DarkRain.  I'm a cat parent.  I know my cats have been family.  I know EXACTLY how upset you are about the possibility of losing your companion.  (I'll add I've had a bit of a green thumb over the years and, yeah, many of my plants move with me).

I've reread some of your older posts.  I certainly don't know all the specifics of your situation, but my deepest hope is that you somehow can use this as an opportunity to break free of what sounds like has been years of emotional torture.  I feel so helpless.  I'd hope you can find a family of YOUR choosing.

I know you're feeling completely overwhelmed right now and the last thing I want to do is add to that feeling.  Can you think of any resources you might have who could help you?

 

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Thanks MarkintheDark. I don't know anyone. We have family friends but I'm not that close to them and they're more my parents friends. I have no other family where I live and no friends, so there really isn't anyone I can go to for help. I'm trying to finish school and hopefully get a job that'll get me enough money for at least an apartment. It seems like a long way off though and the job market isn't encouraging.

I really wouldn't know where to look for help.

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  • 3 weeks later...

had another run-in with mom today. I'm out of contacts and needed to order more so I asked my mom how to order them since she always does it for me. I asked her for the phone number for the place and she wouldn't answer me. Just went on about how I hadn't had an exam in two years (untrue I had one last year) and how I'd need to schedule an appointment and how we should drive over to the place to do it.

I just wanted the phone number so I could call in the prescription. That's all. I gave up and googled the phone number and put it in my phone. I was going to call the place after grocery shopping since she wanted to do it in the morning, but just as we're ready to go she decides that she's going to call the place and make an appointment. So I have to sit down and wait and I don't dare argue because she's blown up at me before. She made the appointment for me and everything. I don't get the chance to do anything myself.  I don't want to fight it because she's gone off at me before for trying to do things by myself.

I just wanted the phone number. I stood there for a minute waiting for it and not getting it, I go onto google and get it within two seconds with no fuss....

don't do this to your kids. Please. Just let them do things and if they ask for help just nudge them in the right direction. Don't take the learning opportunity away, do it yourself, then hand it back to them. That doesn't accomplish anything. Part of being a parent is raising your kids to be self-sufficient. This is the opposite of parenting. I should have kept my mouth shut in the first place and asked google instead.

Dad does the same thing with refusing to work out the steps on how to parallel park and instead just tells me to go watch a youtube video.

Always with both of them it's all or nothing.

Edited by DarkRain
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13 minutes ago, DarkRain said:

had another run-in with mom today. I'm out of contacts and needed to order more so I asked my mom how to order them since she always does it for me. I asked her for the phone number for the place and she wouldn't answer me. Just went on about how I hadn't had an exam in two years (untrue I had one last year) and how I'd need to schedule an appointment and how we should drive over to the place to do it.

I just wanted the phone number so I could call in the prescription. That's all. I gave up and googled the phone number and put it in my phone. I was going to call the place after grocery shopping since she wanted to do it in the morning, but just as we're ready to go she decides that she's going to call the place and make an appointment. So I have to sit down and wait and I don't dare argue because she's blown up at me before. She made the appointment for me and everything. I don't get the chance to do anything myself.  I don't want to fight it because she's gone off at me before for trying to do things by myself.

I just wanted the phone number. I stood there for a minute waiting for it and not getting it, I go onto google and get it within two seconds with no fuss....

don't do this to your kids. Please. Just let them do things and if they ask for help just nudge them in the right direction. Don't take the learning opportunity away, do it yourself, then hand it back to them. That doesn't accomplish anything. Part of being a parent is raising your kids to be self-sufficient. This is the opposite of parenting. I should have kept my mouth shut in the first place and asked google instead.

Dad does the same thing with refusing to work out the steps on how to parallel park and instead just tells me to go watch a youtube video.

Always with both of them it's all or nothing.

Yes, you are right they should allow you the opportunity to learn how

to do things on your own and it will help better prepare you for the

real world when they are no longer around to help you.  Hang in there

my friend

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