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Too skinny for love


regretgirl

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I've been talking to a local guy online for about two weeks. As depressed as I am, he brightened my mood and we exchanged a lot of laughs. He seemed to really care about me and would always be interested in what I'm doing and how I am. I thought it was heading in a positive direction.

Tonight after a bit of flirting, he asked me for a full body pic in my mirror (fully clothed, nothing risky). I was a bit reluctant because I don't have any confidence, but I agreed because he mentioned a few times he really likes thin girls. I'm on the brink of 100 pounds and this is a huge insecurity, but since he was so adamant about liking it, I felt kind of safe to share one with him.

I took a lot of pics trying to get the perfect one, and finally settled on one I thought looked the "best". I sent it to him and in response... he put a bunch of laughing faces. 

I said "I'm guessing you don't like how I look" and he said "yes" and stopped replying to me.

I didn't expect this because he had been so nice to me. Even if he thought I was disgusting (I don't blame him), I wish he would have rejected me with more kindness.

Now I feel very stupid and it has reinforced the fact that I am a joke to everyone. That men see me and immediately block me out as a potential partner based on how I look. I've been battling suicidal thoughts and self hatred for a long time and I should have known not to do this. I should have stayed in my place instead of trying to appeal to someone. I am such a dumb person.

I don't know what sort of responses I expect from this, but thank you for reading.

Edited by regretgirl
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Glad you came here to vent. And I'm sorry that you had to experience this 😕

First of all, you are NOT disgusting. I'm sure you are beautiful, inside and out ❤️

I have the opposite problem, as I am on the bigger side and there are many men who don't like that. And you know what? That's okay ! I'm not everyone's cup of tea, and I'm sure some of the guys who see my profile would prefer someone of your size. 

Not everyone is going to like the same thing....and that's good 😊 

I suspect I'm likely much older than you but as you get older , men's views of women change. The perfect 10 body isn't as important as someone who is loving and kind and caring. Don't get me wrong, physical chemistry is important but it can often come after you get to know the person. 

I'm sure you know that looks aren't everything. And while it's okay not to be someone's type, the manner in which he responded was hurtful and downright cruel in my opinion. You don't need him, nor his opinion. 

Its tough to hear that you have such negative thoughts about yourself 😕 and I wish I could help you. 

I hope that you have other people in your life, not just men, who can tell you how beautiful and wonderful you are. 

Please don't let the opinion of one , or two or three people get you even more down on yourself. It's really not worth it. 

Are you in therapy at all ? 

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Unfortunately were all rejected for some reason in our lives. If a person is dumb enough to stop talking to you abruptly after  speaking for a few weeks that means that they had nothing to offer you and even though it may seem though you are far better off by not having a relationship with him. I'm sorry you have been battling suicidal thoughts and struggle with insecurities. Confidence makes a big difference in having a relationship. You don't have to boast and make others feel belittled, you just have to believe everyone has something to offer.  I hope you feel better soon and  u you cherish yourself more, life is too short to focus on what is out of our grasp, try to hold on to what makes you happy.

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Wow. That guy sounds quite shallow. I'm sorry you had to experience that.

As @mayita said, we all get rejected for some reason. If I had a dollar for every time I've been rejected, I'd be a wealthy man.

Edited by JD4010
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1 hour ago, JD4010 said:

Wow. That guy sounds quite shallow. I'm sorry you had to experience that.

I agree, his reaction was very shallow and immature. OK, sometimes someone isn't our type but there are better ways to communicate that, laughing is disrespectful beyond belief. Not sure how tall you are but depending on your height 100 lbs is OK, I doubt that it was because of that. Maybe he expected to see a super model, who knows. Some guys just watch porn all day and develop ridiculous standards...

Either way, try not to take it personally. It doesn't matter what you look like, you'll never be able to please everybody. Just do the best with what you have and find someone who appreciates you for who you are. No point in beating yourself up over what some jerk on the Internet said. I know, easier said that done... 

32 minutes ago, sober4life said:

The people that reject us by laughing need to be punched!  The nerve it takes for people to laugh!

Let's start a hit squad 😁

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Some people 'say' horrible things online when they can be anonymous. Better to find out early that the guy is a jerk.

Im sure there are lots of guys that would be thrilled to be your friend. Just keep trying.

Isnt there a saying about kissing a lot of frogs before finding a prince? Something like that...

Dont let that :!$@** get to you, just move on.

 

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18 hours ago, Steveab63 said:

Some people 'say' horrible things online when they can be anonymous. Better to find out early that the guy is a jerk.

Im sure there are lots of guys that would be thrilled to be your friend. Just keep trying.

Isnt there a saying about kissing a lot of frogs before finding a prince? Something like that...

Dont let that :!$@** get to you, just move on.

 

Wow. That's a great post! I love the line "Better to find out early that the guy is a jerk." Very true. Who knows what this loser of a guy would be like down the road?

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