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How Do You Feel Right Now? #7


Natasha1

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Thanks for the Happy Birthday wishes guys!!! ❤️ I don't like being 20 so far... I feel lost, stuck in life, embarrassed about my age and just weirder in general. I was beginning to turn my life around, until my birthday came... 

It's a weird thought... Have you ever thought to yourself "I was making progress but since my new decade of life started bad, it'll end bad?" Sorry if that doesn't make sense!!! Yesterday, I didn't sleep all night. I was tired through the day. I had a long, long (but fun) day with my brother because it was his Birthday too! Then some people ruined my Birthday by getting angry for no reason! I'm not getting into it...

I'm getting back on track right now. Of course, I'm still sticking to the "no alcohol" regime and trying to find peace within myself. Alcohol still tastes like rubbish anyway. It's gross and pure poison to your body! Getting drunk is fun but comes at a heavy price! 

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2 minutes ago, sober4life said:

I'm happier that way too!

Same. I tried being someone else for a week and it failed miserably. I have been myself since then. I feel better being my weird self. People try so badly to fit in during their teenage years, I’ll be myself instead, that results in me being an outsider, but I would rather be with someone who likes me for the way I am instead of some kind of fake persona.

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8 minutes ago, JustAnotherSufferer said:

@babyxgothxx

Yeah, the most important thing is to be yourself. Being yourself can hurt in the way that you’re treated though. People avoid people that are themselves, they just hang out with the sheep. It’s pretty sad if you ask me. 

I’m starting to be more accepting of who I am. I still dislike myself because of my low self esteem, but I don’t care about looks and all that anymore. I soon look like Jim Morrison with my haircut, but I don’t care. I like it even though it’s not hip and cool. I would rather be myself than to follow like a sheep.

You're right! I've spent my entire teenage years trying to be someone else. Only a few weeks ago (still 19) I started liking who I am! I compared myself to girls in magazines all the time... I had so many toxic crushes and I constantly compared myself to their girlfriends and celeb crushes! I have a new crush (who doesn't really fit in) recently and I think he's really cute and I'm obsessed with him! Most people find him ugly 😞 

That proves the whole "beauty is subjective" thing is true. I began to feel beautiful (as myself) and a really cool person! Please don't be a sheep just to fit in. Sometimes, even the most popular people are unhappy. They have everything but have nothing... PS I love Jim Morrison!!!! His haircut is really cool if I say so myself ❤️ 

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@babyxgothxx

Exactly! I don’t find today’s version of beauty attractive, it’s all subjective. People define beauty differently. 

Thats great that you have found someone that you like. 

I won’t become one. It’s already too late hahaha. People know me as the weird kid from day one. I don’t follow the trends that I’m supposed to do and I’m proud of that. 

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40 minutes ago, JustAnotherSufferer said:

@babyxgothxx

Exactly! I don’t find today’s version of beauty attractive, it’s all subjective. People define beauty differently. 

Thats great that you have found someone that you like. 

I won’t become one. It’s already too late hahaha. People know me as the weird kid from day one. I don’t follow the trends that I’m supposed to do and I’m proud of that. 

Yes! I think today's fashion and beauty is too fake with both male and female... The things they do, like pranks and stuff are completely pointless and stupid. It's not cool! 

Awww thanks! It's awesome to finally break free from those jerks... It was rough! I constantly craved a boyfriend but now I don't... I don't want one. I think it's too common and overrated I guess? I'm happy with me, myself and I ❤️ 

That's amazing how you're proud of being you! I think "weird" people have a higher chance of being successful because they stand out... Look at Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, some famous singers and they never fit in... I see "weird" as a blessing in disguise ❤️ 

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I had some skin cancer removed from my leg.

The incision should've stopped bleeding by now (almost 24 hours) but it started bleeding when I stood in the kitchen to cook my breakfast.

Now I'm sitting on the sofa applying direct pressure to the wound to stop the bleeding.

 

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@babyxgothxx

I have accepted the way I am and the life I’m probably going to live. I don’t have unreachable goals or big expectations of myself. I just do my best and see what happens.

yeah, Modern fashion really bugs me. It just feels so fake. Natural beauty is the best, no amount of hair products, skin care etc. can reach that kind of beauty.

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Pretty much constant anxiety today, and since I've been home I've been having stress reactions from something that I can't figure out. Like, both my face and hands are "falling asleep".

And I've been doing the things that I enjoy all day. *sigh* Why can't I just be better?

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Today, I'm bored as always, still very loney, wish I had a friend to do something with.I really hate doing everything  by myself.  My life is boring  and not exciting at all. Just want to sleep all the time. Depression runs in my family, I take meds, but I just don't like where I am at right now in my life. I really hate being depressed, it just controls your whole life. I wish my meds would help me be more out going and not feel depressed, I have try ed lots of meds. I'm on Viibrid right now, I feel really good when things are going good, but when things aren't going good I feel so depressed. 

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considering i suffer from depression surprisingly well compared to where i was but no where near where i need to be,  but good progress, therapist is working with me to get past the childhood trauma that has haunted me for a lifetime now that i am finally open, honest with her and letting her in to see what's in my head, no more hiding the true issue and burying it deep in my head,  hopefully i don't regret opening it all over again but for now anyway it's ok,  finally found a med combination that allows me to sleep all night and not be a zombie all day, woohoo sleep, this is what it feels like, awesome, now just to get to living my life the way i need to, soon, well someday anyway.

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