womanofthelight Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 That time of night . . . listening to some Music to Cry By, trying to exorcise the grief I feel about my life and the many mistakes I've made. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
babyxgothxx Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 It's my Birthday today Can't stay on long though... Gotta leave soon! Hope you guys are alright... Love you very much and thanks for being there for me... You are like a real family in my eyes 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 I celebrated 11 months sober yesterday by eating 18 blueberry waffles for supper. Now I have to walk all day today. Was it worth it? Of course it was. 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steveab63 Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 Mmm waffles. Congrats on the sobriety. It will pay off in the future. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bellerose Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 I can break myself down just by opening my mouth. Just now I realize, I’ve been acting in a way which I’ve appalled seeing from others. I feel so much shame and fear. the next three days I am surrounded by people, literally everywhere. I have a feeling I’ll go hard on the drinks n smoking until I have to come back to reality. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladysmurf Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 22 hours ago, BeyondWeary said: What do you believe happens after you die? Even resting in peace forever sounds good to me but how can we know that is a sure thing either? we don't everyone has their own beliefs. mine is that you end up dead, and its nothing emptiness. it's like being on anesthesia forever .. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pusheen Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 This morning I feel overwhelmed and sad. Missing my ex and my old life. Life goes on and I get reluctantly dragged along behind it. Maybe I'll feel better after a proper meal, a walk, and a bath. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustAnotherSufferer Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 I feel like trash to be honest. Saw a group of people and got really depressed. They remind me how lonely and isolated I am. People my age are going out and having fun together while I’m questioning the meaning of life. I’m stuck in my own little world. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wisteria Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 I didn't want to be born. Human life is exhausting and lonely. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
babyxgothxx Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 I'm 20 and don't believe it! I'm not gonna make it to 30, that's for sure 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeyondWeary Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 I'm feeling out-of-sorts more than usual. Yet the weekend is almost here and I have some hope. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
babyxgothxx Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 I was doing fine... Now I'm back to that crazy, suicidal freak again and it's my Birthday... That's just sad. At least I'm not drinking anymore 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustAnotherSufferer Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 @babyxgothxx Same! My birthday sucked as well. I’m back to feeling depressed, lonely and anxious. It didn’t help seeing a bunch people having fun and hanging out while I was outside. It hurts so much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
babyxgothxx Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 17 minutes ago, JustAnotherSufferer said: @babyxgothxx Same! My birthday sucked as well. I’m back to feeling depressed, lonely and anxious. It didn’t help seeing a bunch people having fun and hanging out while I was outside. It hurts so much. Aww dear... I know how you feel. I wish today was my last day alive Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustAnotherSufferer Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 @babyxgothxx I have been feeling that way lately as well. Been talking to a suicidal person. We made a promise to eachother to stay safe, I’ll do my best to keep that promise. living life as an outcast/loner sucks. Sadly, I can’t fit in with other people, even if I tried. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
APFSDS Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 Feeling low but have more energy than usual. Don't really want to go to sleep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Floor2017 Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 Don’t waste that energy go try to do something positive with it. I’m glad you are feeling energized instead of down and out Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Floor2017 Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 I really don’t feel like doing much today so I’m taking me a down day before returning back to work this weekend 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD4010 Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 On 8/9/2018 at 11:40 AM, BeyondWeary said: What do you believe happens after you die? Even resting in peace forever sounds good to me but how can we know that is a sure thing either? We can't know. I don't fear death. But I do fear the process of dying. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD4010 Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 11 hours ago, babyxgothxx said: It's my Birthday today Can't stay on long though... Gotta leave soon! Hope you guys are alright... Love you very much and thanks for being there for me... You are like a real family in my eyes Happy birthday, of course. I hope you had a great day. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD4010 Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 1 hour ago, babyxgothxx said: I'm 20 and don't believe it! I'm not gonna make it to 30, that's for sure Ha. Sure you will! I never thought I'd make it as far as I have...but here I am. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeyondWeary Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 1 hour ago, babyxgothxx said: I was doing fine... Now I'm back to that crazy, suicidal freak again and it's my Birthday... That's just sad. At least I'm not drinking anymore Blessed Birthday to you! You have come a long way if you're not drinking anymore! Hang in there. Things always change. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD4010 Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 I screwed up something big time on a personal level. I let myself get carried away but had to pull myself back. Somebody got emotionally hurt as a result. I was trying to be a "nice guy" but wound up getting too involved. I apologized profusely but the emotional pain for the other person remains. This is the way my life proceeds. I'm a profoundly negative force within the universe. No wonder it hates me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheSandman Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 (edited) I just wrote down everything I've felt over the last few years that's bubbled up. I don't want to let my feelings bottle up anymore, but looking back at stuff it's never easy, especially when you feel like you're to blame for all of it. I can't decide whether I'm relieved that it's out or still just as scared as I was before. Edited August 10, 2018 by TheSandman 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeyondWeary Posted August 10, 2018 Share Posted August 10, 2018 4 minutes ago, JD4010 said: I screwed up something big time on a personal level. I let myself get carried away but had to pull myself back. Somebody got emotionally hurt as a result. I was trying to be a "nice guy" but wound up getting too involved. I apologized profusely but the emotional pain for the other person remains. This is the way my life proceeds. I'm a profoundly negative force within the universe. No wonder it hates me. Hi JD. I think you are a human being that is perfectly imperfect. You did as well as you could at the time. Negative self-talk just does more damage and it is something we have control over. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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