surfcaster Posted June 14, 2018 Share Posted June 14, 2018 18 hours ago, velvetpuddles said: Does she not ask something like that regularly? Everytime I see my psychiatrist, he asks me if I've had any thoughts or concerns of self-harm. I just thought that was normal. Of course, my second visit to his office, I saw someone taken to the hospital. Sooo... not entirely comfortable expressing the extent of those thoughts anymore. Not that I'm concerned for my safety or anything. Anyway, I digress. Keep your head up! You always have friends here to help you. not right up front like she's saying you probably need to, usually kind of in conversation , like how do you feel, do you feel safe, never the added there's no disgrace in inpatient care 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velvetpuddles Posted June 14, 2018 Share Posted June 14, 2018 56 minutes ago, surfcaster said: not right up front like she's saying you probably need to, usually kind of in conversation , like how do you feel, do you feel safe, never the added there's no disgrace in inpatient care Well, keep in mind it's entirely possible that she didn't mean it how you took it. Why not ask her about it next time? Especially if it's eating at you. Anyway, what's important is how you feel you're doing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roadking02 Posted June 14, 2018 Share Posted June 14, 2018 Not ready for tomorrow because of having to be back on the 12 hour day grind. Getting up at 4am certainly is getting old really fast and standing around being bored doesn't help either. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
surfcaster Posted June 14, 2018 Share Posted June 14, 2018 1 hour ago, velvetpuddles said: Well, keep in mind it's entirely possible that she didn't mean it how you took it. Why not ask her about it next time? Especially if it's eating at you. Anyway, what's important is how you feel you're doing. well yeah, i do see your point, maybe i am reading too much into it, as i have a tendency to do i guess, thanks for the input 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bellerose Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 my day changed drastically. From using my medication correctly, to changing my outlook, to talking to my mother, to feeling more mature and secure, to learning through failing but not giving up, I've feel as if I am a different person. I even received an offer for an interview that is very important to me. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 Things went well today. Someone offered me full time work today. I'm not sure what I'm going to do. This life is crazy anymore and things seem to change constantly. I'm just trying to take each day as it comes and try not to completely lose my mind. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anxiousE Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 11 hours ago, babyxgothxx said: Yes I told him before! I told him the reason why I keep unfriending him is because I'm trying to move on! He didn't know what to say, so I said that "I didn't mean it" straight after! He told me that he doesn't "find any awkwardness" in me liking him and that he's committed to his girlfriend. I think that was a rejection right there. I just know it! I'm obviously not ready to move on. I try! It's this feeling in my gut, saying we must be friends or life is hopeless. That is what's stopping me. I don't think he likes me because he's taken and I hate myself. So, I expect others to hate me too! Maybe he friends me back because he's desperate for more Facebook friends? I don't know lol He has over a thousand so maybe he's trying to grab as many as he can?? Haha Oh ok. Well, he's committed so while he's probably genuinely flattered you want to be his friend, but the relationship doesn't mean the same to him. It sounds like he might have some immaturity issue of not letting you go if he knows how painful this is for you, so in that sense, he may not actually be perfect. Anyway, The reason I pry and comment so is because I can relate. I thought I needed to move on from someone because I couldn't trust their intentions (even though they seemed perfect, right?), but it was very hard and I felt that same way that life is hopeless without them. Coming out on the other side of this I can tell you it's not hopeless, but it will take some time to heal. I honestly don't know what's worse, walking away knowing they won't reach back for you or having them leave you. Probably the latter, then again I couldn't walk away in my situation so that was pretty hard. They left me though in the end though, so my choice was made for me. But I was thinking if I could do anything different, I would have unfollowed them on FB rather than unfriend. Give some time to see if you can be without them, without actually being without them. Know what I mean? Stop looking at their page for a given amount of time until you feel less and less attached. Meanwhile, try to move on to other folks and things that gain your interest. Try to challenge yourself to see how long you can go without looking and don't comment. And maybe stop drinking for awhile if that's what gets you in trouble. It's a last resort. Maybe in time you can have the relationship that fits you both. Emotional space is what people would tell me and had I known it sooner, this is what I would have done. Again, don't mean this to make trouble for you, just giving you something else to try if moving on is too hard right now. I mean, if you do have a choice, I'd try this. Good luck! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velvetpuddles Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 26 minutes ago, sober4life said: This life is crazy anymore and things seem to change constantly. Ain't that the truth!! I feel like I have whiplash from it all! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anxiousE Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 How I feel right now? Well, I've stopped bawling my eyes out, so I'd say better. I started back up on the Zoloft today. I'm wondering if that would have kicked in so soon or maybe I just had enough of the hopelessness and ...haha. It's gotta be the Zoloft, or some miracle. I haven't been able to turn off the sadness or whatever you call it in days! Whatever. I'm glad to be better. Hoping it stays. Sending positive vibes. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velvetpuddles Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 3 minutes ago, anxiousE said: It sounds like he might have some immaturity issue of not letting you go if he knows how painful this is for you, so in that sense, he may not actually be perfect. Good point! You made some great suggestions. Healing definitely takes time, and everyone does it at their own pace, but I think the key is consciously and will-fully making the decision and then the effort. Good luck, @babyxgothxx. We're rooting for you 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velvetpuddles Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 Just now, anxiousE said: How I feel right now? Well, I've stopped bawling my eyes out, so I'd say better. I started back up on the Zoloft today. I'm wondering if that would have kicked in so soon or maybe I just had enough of the hopelessness and ...haha. It's gotta be the Zoloft, or some miracle. I haven't been able to turn off the sadness or whatever you call it in days! Whatever. I'm glad to be better. Hoping it stays. Sending positive vibes. To you, too! Regardless of what's going on in my life, I seem to get those random dips, too. I just start crying about anything and everything for days. And just as suddenly, I stop crying. I don't get it at all! Hugs to you! Keep believing you'll get better 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velvetpuddles Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 I'm feeling okay today. I had a really bad day yesterday; I let things get to me that I shouldn't have and couldn't shake it. Had a decent mood day today. I did slip a little while doing laundry and indulged a train of thought that I KNEW would only upset me. And it did, of course. I let myself feel it for a few moments and then forced myself into some mental distractions (reading, friendly chatting, posting here and on another site I frequent). The power of that thought train seems to have faded. So now I'm back to feeling okay. Not great, but okay, which is all I can ask for right now. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faeriefate Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 I feel completely abandoned. I'm going through the biggest change I've ever experienced, and I have no one. Those I try to go to just don't get it, what it's like living with depression, especially when dealing with big changes. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
salparadise6132 Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 On 6/13/2018 at 2:53 PM, _E_ said: suicidal i cant deal with things right now i give up Hi _ E_ I hope you're feeling better today, my friend!!! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Natasha1 Posted June 15, 2018 Author Share Posted June 15, 2018 Unloved Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
salparadise6132 Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 11 hours ago, bellerose said: It's here again. Don't want to be on this earth. People i love leave me when i need them and my family only makes it worse with their concern. i wish i could just end all of their concerns, then they wouldn't have anything to worry about anymore. And the ones who are supposed to be there for me won't have anything to leave behind anymore. I have the whole day to myself. I'm nervous. bellerose, you, I know from following this thread closer than I do Game of Thrones, always weather these storms!!! I know you're low, but, you do come through. You're a sailor, and sometimes there are rough seas. Getting through them is your special talent!!!! In a few days or a few weeks you will not be thinking of not being here. Please remember that. Hugs!!! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TopekaK Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 On 6/10/2018 at 1:08 PM, JD4010 said: Me too! Gord's Gold eh? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TopekaK Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 All I'm good for is staring out the window. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Misguided_ghost_ Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 Like the cloud is lifting a little. I hope it lasts. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 4 hours ago, Natasha1 said: Unloved We all love you here! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 8 hours ago, velvetpuddles said: Ain't that the truth!! I feel like I have whiplash from it all! Yes I'm a survivor though. I'm sick of having to be a survivor. Today I'm hosting a party for the whole family. What a nightmare this is going to be! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_E_ Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 20 hours ago, velvetpuddles said: That seems strange to me! Have you been seeing her long? If she's not a dedicated psych professional, it might be worth looking into one if you can. I'm so sorry you're having a difficult time! Hang in there; we're all here for you. the dr said she would see what am like in a months time but i have to go through being even more depressed than what i am now my psych already says am on too much meds unsure what she might say i see her on monday hopefully she does something Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladysmurf Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 That pretty soon I am going to explode. I can't take it for much longer.......This is so unfair for someone to feel this way.. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Natasha1 Posted June 15, 2018 Author Share Posted June 15, 2018 3 hours ago, sober4life said: We all love you here! You are loved back 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
feellikeitwontend Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 On 6/13/2018 at 5:21 PM, sober4life said: Tomorrow I have to make big life decisions that will affect the rest of my life. Tomorrow really begins the days where we will see just how strong I am. My brother is here visiting. He doesn't visit anyone. He is here to decide what is going to happen with mom next. How are you doing today? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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