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Tungsten Aromatics

What's On Your Mind Right Now? (2)

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12 hours ago, vega57 said:

I'm usually glad when vacations are over because they can be tiring.

I'm putting on a great performance.   Everyone thinks I'm doing great and they couldn't farther from the truth.

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16 hours ago, Asta said:

Maybe if I get another cat that's not obsessed 😻  with me it would balance my cat out.

Mine are obsessed with me, too. Follow me around like puppy dogs. I get confused if they disappear for a short time to nap somewhere away from me since I'm so used to them staying close!

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18 hours ago, Asta said:

Maybe if I get another cat that's not obsessed 😻  with me it would balance my cat out.

I was lucky and adopted an older "bonded pair" who had been together since kittenhood. How old is your feline?

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3 hours ago, surfcaster said:

gonna try to go back to work on monday, need to do it before the FMLA leave runs out which is keeping my job while i'm out

Best of luck. I filed for FMLA as a form of protection from getting fired. "Mental health days" don't go over too well at my office.

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7 hours ago, JD4010 said:

Best of luck. I filed for FMLA as a form of protection from getting fired. "Mental health days" don't go over too well at my office.

I hear you, but that's what it's there for so I'm using it, way i figure it im not stayin out the whole 12 weeks so I'm not abusing it

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25 minutes ago, surfcaster said:

I hear you, but that's what it's there for so I'm using it, way i figure it im not stayin out the whole 12 weeks so I'm not abusing it

I need to get out of this office for at least a 2 week stretch. Or else. My mood and patience have both decayed so badly.

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2 hours ago, surfcaster said:

I hear you, but that's what it's there for so I'm using it, way i figure it im not stayin out the whole 12 weeks so I'm not abusing it

I would abuse it.  If I was allowed 12 weeks I would use it all at once.   

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2 hours ago, JD4010 said:

I need to get out of this office for at least a 2 week stretch. Or else. My mood and patience have both decayed so badly.

Take 12 weeks in a row.  Your boss is an a****** and deserves it.

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35 minutes ago, sober4life said:

I would abuse it.  If I was allowed 12 weeks I would use it all at once.   

part of me agrees with you but a bigger part of me needs to be able to support myself , pride won't let me

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Like the saying goes: fake till you make and we can add maybe break it. Listen, we, sorry my granddaughter just now wants a hug and I lost my thoughts. So let me try: today we buried our twelfth family member, this one on my wife's side, my brother in law, Raymond. I'll tell a bit about him to hopefully inspire and encourage you. He spent a total of 18 years in prison for a crime he didn't commit, I know for certain he didn't cause I've known him since he was a child. He came out, got addicted, spent years living on the streets, fast forward a few years he's married, family, job, you know, the American dream.  He was an extremely funny, loving, self deprecating and giving, always laughing but like you, me and many more he lived with an inner pain of the soul. He wasn't very tall, about five-seven but very muscular, imposing and appeared scary but yet in lived with this inner pain. He told that in prison one has to put up a front, show no fear even when ur knees buckle, thus fake it till you make it. In the last few years he finally made it, he put his guard down and just enjoed life till last week when he died from the damage of long ago drug use. Please understand that I an minimizing ur pain just hopefully encouraging you a bit. Life in it's own merits is hard, sometimes extremely so, and that's where people like us find ourselves. If I'm have read some of my posts you'll find in them joy, anger, frustration, at my witts end, lashing out, encouraging others, feeling sorry for myself, all the emotions and feelings in the spectrum, it's called life. So let me encourage you to try and rise above the fog of mental illness and maybe try NOT to hide behind your smile but share ur pain with someone who is willing to hear you out and wont blab it out to others. sometimes that's all we need. You really cant hide always. What good comes of it besides nothing. 

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1 hour ago, sober4life said:

I want to break every mirror in the house so I don't have to see this monster anymore!

I know that feeling all too well. I have one mirror in my place and I rarely look into it. I don't like what I see at all. Sometimes I loathe it.

I was a weight lifter for many years. Even when I was in tip-top shape, I hated how I looked. Probably because I was looking into the mind of the thing I was seeing.

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Posted (edited)

My mistrust verging on paranoia. My dislike of people in general. The pints I intend to drink in an hour or two. Kickboxing and jujutsu. Sex. Quantum mechanics, cosmolology and sex. Oh I said that already.

Edited by samadhiSheol

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Posted (edited)
30 minutes ago, samadhiSheol said:

My mistrust verging on paranoia. My dislike of people in general. The pints I intend to drink in an hour or two. Kickboxing and jujutsu. Sex. Quantum mechanics, cosmolology and sex. Oh I said that already.

That's quite a variety of things to think about in combination. 😀

My paranoia is picking up as well. I'm more and more convinced that my boss has it out for me.

Edited by JD4010

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3 minutes ago, JD4010 said:

That's quite a variety of things to think about in combination. 😀

Hell yes and all at once just a jumble of trivia no sense in any of my thoughts. (Hypo)mania pushing through..

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I suppose it makes me smile reading the troubleshooting section for my coffee maker trying to fix it.  One of the problems listed is the coffee maker only brews water.  They have to tell someone to put coffee in the filter to fix that problem.  Some total a****** out there has to be told that!

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9 hours ago, samadhiSheol said:

My mistrust verging on paranoia. My dislike of people in general. The pints I intend to drink in an hour or two. Kickboxing and jujutsu. Sex. Quantum mechanics, cosmolology and sex. Oh I said that already.

I don't like or trust people either but at the same time I need them in my life because of depression so time and time again I seek them out so they can destroy me over and over.

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