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regretgirl

I'm a loser and my life is going nowhere.

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I am 24 years old, soon to be 25.

Female.

Still living with my parents.

Crap job.

Don't have one friend to talk to.

My future is going nowhere.

I apologize if this is jumbled up but my life is a wreck and I don't know how to express it very well.

To start, I have a part time job in retail, selling clothes, and I am completely miserable. I don't make hardly enough money to move out with my current salary and do not have the qualifications necessary to get another job, so I'm stuck where I am. My parents keep putting subtle pressure on me to move out - saying I need to figure my life out and get it together. They seem to believe that I can just go out and get an excellent job like that. I would do that in a heartbeat but how am I supposed to without necessary qualifications or experience? I look at job boards weekly and I don't qualify for anything that's in demand. I'm just a burden taking up space and adding to their electricity bill and I hate myself for it.

I got a bachelors in psychology which is completely useless. "What to do with a psych degree" is a popular google search which ends up fruitless. To become a counsellor requires a surprisingly large amount of certification and after all of that their salary is still low. I don't have a passion for it anyway so I don't know why I studied it. Typical me, making stupid decisions.

I have no passions or direction. If I knew what I wanted to do at least I could work towards it somehow, but I have no clue, no interest and no spark in my life.

I see my old friends from high school and they're mostly successful. Many of them studied accounting and finance which is a huge industry where I live. They got necessary experience from interning years ago alongside university, and are already living on their own and building a successful career. Although we graduated high school at the same time I am years behind them. I don't know why I was such an ***** and chose to study something that has little opportunity. It seems as if everyone got their life planned out early while I just went with the flow.. Until I realized it's too late and I've made nothing of my life.

On another forum site 2 years ago I wrote about the SAME thing I'm posting today. How I have no job, no friends, living with parents, etc. Yes two years ago.

Years have gone by and I haven't improved myself at all. 2018 will be the same and I'm ready to end it all.

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1 hour ago, regretgirl said:
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I am 24 years old, soon to be 25.

Female.

Still living with my parents.

Crap job.

Don't have one friend to talk to.

My future is going nowhere.

I apologize if this is jumbled up but my life is a wreck and I don't know how to express it very well.

To start, I have a part time job in retail, selling clothes, and I am completely miserable. I don't make hardly enough money to move out with my current salary and do not have the qualifications necessary to get another job, so I'm stuck where I am. My parents keep putting subtle pressure on me to move out - saying I need to figure my life out and get it together. They seem to believe that I can just go out and get an excellent job like that. I would do that in a heartbeat but how am I supposed to without necessary qualifications or experience? I look at job boards weekly and I don't qualify for anything that's in demand. I'm just a burden taking up space and adding to their electricity bill and I hate myself for it.

I got a bachelors in psychology which is completely useless. "What to do with a psych degree" is a popular google search which ends up fruitless. To become a counsellor requires a surprisingly large amount of certification and after all of that their salary is still low. I don't have a passion for it anyway so I don't know why I studied it. Typical me, making stupid decisions.

I have no passions or direction. If I knew what I wanted to do at least I could work towards it somehow, but I have no clue, no interest and no spark in my life.

I see my old friends from high school and they're mostly successful. Many of them studied accounting and finance which is a huge industry where I live. They got necessary experience from interning years ago alongside university, and are already living on their own and building a successful career. Although we graduated high school at the same time I am years behind them. I don't know why I was such an ***** and chose to study something that has little opportunity. It seems as if everyone got their life planned out early while I just went with the flow.. Until I realized it's too late and I've made nothing of my life.

On another forum site 2 years ago I wrote about the SAME thing I'm posting today. How I have no job, no friends, living with parents, etc. Yes two years ago.

Years have gone by and I haven't improved myself at all. 2018 will be the same and I'm ready to end it all.

Hi. I hope you are well there. I'm female, will turn 26 yrs old this year. 

Our situation are almost the same. I always think myself as a loser. Why? Many reasons. Career wise, I'm just a clerk with low salary. I had no degree cause I'm dropped from college when I was 19. I don't have any boyfriend and never had my whole life actually. I have friends but.... if compared myself to them, I am no one. Most of them are well educated, have boyfriend, getting married, have car. 

Trust me, at this age, I don't even have driving license yet. It's too expensive and so many things hold me back in the past. To add into burden, my dad and I are having health problems since last year and it is non ending. Although we're not diagnosed with chronic disease, but still, it's very disturbing. We don't have money to go for private hospital, so we went to government hospital and trust me, our government hospital treatment is so..... ###$&&. 

So, since we're facing the same issue, I want to tell you that first, you need to have the way of thinking that, there are a lot of other people in the world face a lot worse situation than ours. Second, you have to love yourself dear. You need to appreciate yourself. Third, I also don't have any passion. I don't know what I want to do in my life, same as you. But you know, I think I understand why I felt that way. I need to earn money first, only then I can pursue with what I want... I guess I just don't find it yet. That's why I'm doing clerking job as it's the only that can suit me for now. Who knows when I got savings later, time will guide me. 

It's 2018 and we can end this sadness. But step by step. Baby steps. Don't rush into things. Good luck for you. 

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I also feel like I'm in a similar spot. 25 years old, male, bachelor's in psychology, live with parents almost no friends, and seemingly everyone I used to hang out with are much more successful than me, whether that success be in the workforce or in romance. Only, I've never even had a job. If I'm being honest, I can't remember the last time I felt so hopeless in regards to my future and getting where I want to go in life. I have no confidence, I see myself as more and more of a loser every day, I can see all of my faults and none of my strengths, I have no clue what to do, and even if I did, I have no faith in my ability to do whatever it is I need to do.

Now that I've said all that, I'll say something totally different. Much as I may not feel it, 25 is still young, and a college degree is better than a high school diploma. I may live with my parents, but after looking at the cost of living, we've come to agree that the people who get out on their own and succeed are insanely lucky because around here (in Texas), it is very expensive to live comfortably. My friends are few, but I've been in a spot where I had literally nobody and anything is better than that. The people I used to know in my graduating class, turns out I just hung out with the winners. Some of them are already being forced to pay alimony, or are dead. I don't have a job, yes, but I also graduated without a single cent of debt to pay in student loans. And the rest, i attribute to the season, the confusion that comes right after graduation, and the natural depression everyone gets after recovering from their first break up, and they'll probably get better if I keep moving forward and stop beating myself up.

It's your turn now. I just broke down every stupid thought I've had and fought them all with facts. I'm not saying it's easy. Far from it, but as far as I'm concerned, there is nothing else to do. Even if you had something you were passionate about, I doubt you would be doing anything with it while carrying all of this emotional baggage. Write down the facts that counteract your negative thoughts. Try to see a therapist. Get medicated. Do whatever it takes to claw your way out of the pit of despair, because nothing is worth feeling like that.

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Im 27, and facing a similar situation. Living with parents, no (flashy) job, not a single soul to talk to, or go out with...

I'm starting college on Jan. 8 in an area I have some interest in I guess. I'm hoping things will change from there, but the feeling of being under water and so alone hasn't really gone away.

What, to you, would look like the logical next step? Is there any reason why you can't work full time? I wonder if a college type diploma, which usually only lasts 1-2 years or less would help you find a better paying job? Only suggestions though.

I don't know if simply going to school, or getting a better job will solve the internal issue which makes us depressed though. I think the answer lies somewhere in finding what it is that gets you going in life and sparks some life into you. If I'm not mistaken, it shouldn't be the job (which you have) that should dictate this, but rather, you should be following things that have meaning in your life that (ultimately) become your job. Either that or the job supports what it is you want in life. For some people that could be traveling, for others it could be art, music, or theater (as examples).

Just some thoughts on it


 

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I love each and everyone of you! I’m 30 and moved back two years ago with my parents to help pay their bills after I had a depressive episode. Got diagnosed with GAD and MDD and I am in law enforcement! The first time around I was working at the federal level and had a severe meltdown after a breakup and job switch. I was out of it for about five months but worked out vigorously and felt a lot better. I worked Police during the meantime in a reserve setting and logged minimal hours for a couple months. I can tell y’all that I went back full time after a year of feeling great and weaning myself off of my meds (celexa and remeron / Klonopin as needed). As time went on, I started having sleep problems and was put on Ambien to help regulate my schedule. Well needless to say, it’s a miracle drug for a little while and then hit the fan one night and I locked up again. Full blown depression and anxiety again. 

 

We we are all here to help each other and to find solace in others and I believe in each and everyone of you. I also attained a BA in criminal justice and damn near finished my MS in criminology! My days are ****ed up too but I believe forums like this will help us!

 

best wishes on a new day and a new year! You can always comment and keep the thread going to check on each other! We will beat this!

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9 hours ago, regretgirl said:

I would do that in a heartbeat but how am I supposed to without necessary qualifications or experience? I look at job boards weekly and I don't qualify for anything that's in demand.

Oftentimes the desired qualifications and experiences are just an employer's wish list, not firm requirements. Unless it's a job that requires a specific technical skill you will often find that they're open to applicants with other degrees if they make a good first impression. Many office jobs don't really require much of an education to perform, most of it can be learned on the job, the main reason they ask for a degree is to screen applicants, they want to see that you can stick with something (i.e. make it through college) and are reasonably smart. I don't see a single reason why a company wouldn't hire someone with a psych degree for positions such as executive assistant, inside sales, account manager, or marketing. All you have to do is convince them that your degree is valuable for that position which shouldn't be very hard, tell them that you're very good at understanding people's needs and desires. 

Companies like to ask for 2 years of experience even for entry-level jobs but again, that's usually not a firm requirement if you're good at selling yourself to them. The other option is looking for an internship, just make sure it's a paid one since companies that don't pay their interns are often just looking for cheap labor and have no intention of hiring them later on. 

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Hi there! You're truly not alone. Many people have useless degrees. I have one myself in Criminal Justice. Criminal Justice is only useful for law school or to be a cop. 

Have you thought about working as a security guard? Large companies like Allied Universal, G4S, and Securitas are scrambling for people, anybody really. Security work generally pays better than retail and full time jobs are plentiful. Most of the jobs are low risk, unarmed deals - more customer service and observe and report. 

You could literally walk into one of their offices and walk out with a job. You'll be hired before you've interviewed. I'm not making this up. They're especially impressed with people that have degrees.

I'm going back to security after burning out in IT except I'm going armed, higher profile with the hopes of eventually getting on a federal contact and earning in the 30.00 per hour range.

What state do you live in? In many cases, the security company will even pay for your license if the state requires one. PM me if you have questions.

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Well, I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling depress and worthless but you are not worthless

because you have already done something about your life.  You went to college and got yourself

a degree.  Don't let that depress you because I have six college degrees and I'm working in a similar

field but not exactly in what I went to school for.  However, with a college degree it is only meant

to help you be pointed in the right direction it does not exactly put you where you need to be.

The good news is that in studying for a college degree you learn many different things on

your way to achieving that degree.  So, I suggest maybe you need to stop and think about

some of the subjects you studied for that degree and it might just be some hidden jobs

in your degree that you can do outside your major study.  Your degree has already opened

up doors for you, you just got to decide which door to go through from here. Good luck my friend

in this new year of 2018. 

 

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Hi all.

 

I kinda relate to what everyone is saying here.  I'm turning 34 this week.  I have friends, but they're all too busy for me.  Busy with their kids, busy getting boyfriends, spouses, promotions etc. 

 

And I'm not.  I went to college for more than a decade, with nothing to show for it.  I failed math repeatedly, no matter what I did. Plus, I can't afford to go back. I wish all those partial degrees would equal a whole one, you know.  I actually feel lonely, which I never do.  Seriously, I seldom feel that lonely. 

 

College isn't very appealing to me anymore, but I wish I could do something.  I'm good at some things.

 

I have a celebrity obsession I can't shake.  Before I had other things to worry about, now I don't.

 

The only people I really talk to in RL are my therapist, my cousin and brother.  The latter two are annoyed with me.  They never said this directly, but I know they feel that way about me.

 

I just feel...stuck.  Like I'm super-glued to the track and everyone else is speeding forward.

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You said that you are good at some things, well whatever you are good at might be

a starting place for you to try to do something different in your life.  A college degree

does not mean that your whole world is about to change for the good. Try concentrating

on your strengths and your true talents are some where inside your strengths. Yes,

everyone have something that they are good at you might just have to dig a little deeper

inside yourself to find it but it is there hidden inside of you.  Try not to look at everyone else

around you accomplishment because this too can make you become depressed. Just focus

on one of your strength at a time and watch how your world begin to change. 

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I think you are being too hard on yourself. You are only 24. Did you ever consider working as mental health assistant? The hospitals and clinics usually train people to do that, and sometimes most of them do have not even had a bachelors in psychology. If you feel comfortable doing that I would consider that. The psychology degree would be helpful too in getting that type of job, and seeing if you want to continue in that field.

I wouldn't compare yourself to others, that's the worst thing you can do. People always try to paint this perfect image that their life is perfect, but no one really knows what goes on in people's lives. I have friends who post on social media about how much they love their family/spouse/kids, and then b*tch and complain non-stop to me about how much stressed out they are. They are debt, miserable, tired, etc. So like they say everyone is fighting a battle.

Retail isn't easy, and it does not pay a lot. Maybe consider working in a nearby company as a customer service rep or a bank teller? The usually pay a little more. And maybe you can keep the retail part-time for extra cash until you figure things out?

What are your hobbies? interests? Years ago when I felt better and I volunteered is where I met some of the most inspiring people in my life, and a few friends. Maybe you can find something nearby your area that seems interesting to you. Or a hobby? A sport? Perhaps learning a musical instrument? dancing? etc? I'm sure you have something that interests you. You can always save up some money and travel when you are better financially. Traveling helps a lot I believe to realize a lot about yourself. (In my experience it did)

I've known many people who studied one thing, and ended up doing something completely different, so there's nothing wrong with you. A friend of mine finished with a bachelors in psychology and is now a hairdresser and she loves it. That happens to many people. We change over time.

If I was you I'd try to be a little less harder on myself. I never finished my education. I had a specific career in mind since a young child, but because of my health problems I never made it, and it kills me every day just thinking about it. You've accomplished far more than you think, and the fact that you are still seeking out answers and looking for a better future for yourself says a lot..


Good luck!

 

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This might not apply to you, but could you possibly supplement your job with some social media marketing for smaller companies? 

Not totally sure how you break into it, but many companies will pay to have someone run their social media accounts. I'm 24 too, and know a lot about social media, but I know not everyone does- just thought I'd mention it .

I know we're all fighting our own battles, and I would never want to tell someone to just "look at the bright side" but atleast you live where you get to see your parents everyday! I just moved across the country with my fiance and we have no friends here. I'm very close with my family, and miss them every single day. 

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