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Star Glaze

Another bad day, I am scared

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I suddenly woke up at 4:20 in the morning when I usually don't until 6, and I am starting to be worried.

About a month ago I hurt my hands scratching them on a wall and now I've got terrible terrible scars on both of them. Nobody knows about it fortunately, but it's only a matter of time for my parents and friends and probably everyone to notice. I keep hiding them under extra long sleeves, but it's not normal to do it on a daily basis, they are super obvious and I didn't intend for them to be so notorious, I thought they'd just go away in few days, but now I'm ****ed forever.

I don't want to get up and get out of my house. I have school again today and I'm terrified. I don't even want to see my parents face because I feel such guilt building up inside constantly. I am scared, just yesterday my mom told me she was utterly dissapointed on me, and I just keep imagining how she'll feel after she sees my scars. I am a shame, and I don't know how I will get out of this one.

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Why are you so worried about this? Scars on your hand are easy enough to explain away, just say you fell off a bicycle or you were carrying something heavy and slipped. No one will suspect anything or judge you for them, it's not like scars from cutting where it's very obvious to others that they are self-inflicted. 

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3 hours ago, Star Glaze said:
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I suddenly woke up at 4:20 in the morning when I usually don't until 6, and I am starting to be worried.

About a month ago I hurt my hands scratching them on a wall and now I've got terrible terrible scars on both of them. Nobody knows about it fortunately, but it's only a matter of time for my parents and friends and probably everyone to notice. I keep hiding them under extra long sleeves, but it's not normal to do it on a daily basis, they are super obvious and I didn't intend for them to be so notorious, I thought they'd just go away in few days, but now I'm ****ed forever.

I don't want to get up and get out of my house. I have school again today and I'm terrified. I don't even want to see my parents face because I feel such guilt building up inside constantly. I am scared, just yesterday my mom told me she was utterly dissapointed on me, and I just keep imagining how she'll feel after she sees my scars. I am a shame, and I don't know how I will get out of this one.

You are not a shame!  I am worried about your hiding this from everyone.  I wonder if getting found out would be the best thing for you? You need love and help, it sound like to me. If the people around are capable of giving you that, I think you should consider it.

 

Hugs!

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4 hours ago, lonelyforeigner said:

Why are you so worried about this? Scars on your hand are easy enough to explain away, just say you fell off a bicycle or you were carrying something heavy and slipped. No one will suspect anything or judge you for them, it's not like scars from cutting where it's very obvious to others that they are self-inflicted. 

The scars are on my hand dorsums, all around and close to some of my knuckles. They look like blisters there and I've been watching people's hands are quite smooth and beautiful, this scars are ugly. 

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2 hours ago, Star Glaze said:

The scars are on my hand dorsums, all around and close to some of my knuckles. They look like blisters there and I've been watching people's hands are quite smooth and beautiful, this scars are ugly. 

Scars are always ugly but it really isn't something you need to be ashamed of. They'll fade over time, I wouldn't worry so much about it. May take half a year or so but it'll get better. Keep applying lotion that helps the healing process, there are some special ones to reduce scarring. It probably won't heal 100% but you should be able to get to a point where they won't be immediately noticeable. 

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6 hours ago, lonelyforeigner said:

Scars are always ugly but it really isn't something you need to be ashamed of. They'll fade over time, I wouldn't worry so much about it. May take half a year or so but it'll get better. Keep applying lotion that helps the healing process, there are some special ones to reduce scarring. It probably won't heal 100% but you should be able to get to a point where they won't be immediately noticeable. 

Thank you for the advice. I will do so, thank you :)

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I'm sorry you're feeling this way.

Dont be ashamed. Things happen. Scars add character ;)

However, I'm worried that you might get an infection in your hands if it's been that long and they still look bad.  Be careful. You may need medical attention.

i know it's hard to face, but hiding it from everyone will only make it worse for you.

face your fears.  Show them and get it over with. What is the worst thing that can happen if they see them?

Hang in there & best wishes to you.

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19 hours ago, 1966michigan said:

I'm sorry you're feeling this way.

Dont be ashamed. Things happen. Scars add character ;)

However, I'm worried that you might get an infection in your hands if it's been that long and they still look bad.  Be careful. You may need medical attention.

i know it's hard to face, but hiding it from everyone will only make it worse for you.

face your fears.  Show them and get it over with. What is the worst thing that can happen if they see them?

Hang in there & best wishes to you.

I am sure there's no infection. I picked my scabs in anguish and that's probably why the scars are so notorious. I regret everything so so much.

I really don't want to. No one has this type of scars and that troubles me. I don't want my family to worry, they are so happy right now and seeing them would be awful. I'll try to apply something to fade them a little eventually. Thank you :)

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@Star Glaze   I'm sorry about the scars  Maybe you can search for the cream for scars. It can help you. It may takes few weeks or months for the scars to be invisible. I have a big scars on my cheek after I attempted suicide. I use the cream for scars. But it took a few months. It helps. Sorry,  I cant recall the name of the cream. I bought it at the pharmacy. 

I hope you will keep strong. 

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Hey,
I'm sorry you feel the way you do and what your mum said to you. Was there any reason for her doing so, anything happen recently to make her come out with that? I feel that's quite a harsh thing to stay to their child, but hey I'm no parent. As for the scars, if you want them to heal quite quickly look out for a product call Bio-Oil.. it's exactly what you need! :) 
Keep strong pal

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11 hours ago, Stencils118 said:

Hey,
I'm sorry you feel the way you do and what your mum said to you. Was there any reason for her doing so, anything happen recently to make her come out with that? I feel that's quite a harsh thing to stay to their child, but hey I'm no parent. As for the scars, if you want them to heal quite quickly look out for a product call Bio-Oil.. it's exactly what you need! :) 
Keep strong pal

I'm not mad at her at all, she and my dad and my sis are the things I love the most. I did something wrong she had asked not to do and she was very angry. The problem here is I don't want her to discover my scars because she'll have a really hard time.

I've read a little about Bio Oil, but there's so much info out there I don't even know what works and what doesn't. Thanks for the advice.

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12 hours ago, Camellia said:

@Star Glaze   I'm sorry about the scars  Maybe you can search for the cream for scars. It can help you. It may takes few weeks or months for the scars to be invisible. I have a big scars on my cheek after I attempted suicide. I use the cream for scars. But it took a few months. It helps. Sorry,  I cant recall the name of the cream. I bought it at the pharmacy. 

I hope you will keep strong. 

Did the cream really reduce the redness on them? Mine are quite red and they look terrible.

Thanks for the advice!

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On 02/10/2017 at 6:41 AM, Star Glaze said:

Did the cream really reduce the redness on them? Mine are quite red and they look terrible.

Thanks for the advice!

Your welcome. Yes @Star Glaze   the cream reduce the redness. Mine was very red and its was huge on my cheek and they looked terrible too. I hope the pharmacist there can help you. 

Edited by Camellia

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I recommend silicone scar sheets over creams. I had some abdominal surgery and ended up with a big, uneven scar. I used the silicone sheets on all but a small portion of the scar (I was skeptical and wanted to have something to compare). It took months, but the sheets did make a difference. The trick is to find a brand that is most comfortable, to wear as long as you can (24hrs/day, if possible).

I hope you find something that works for you!

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