Jump to content
Honeyflower

How do you feel at this very moment in time?

Recommended Posts

Not too bad. Just saw my Pdoc and was honestly able to report that I feel "better" than I did last time I saw him. I'm feeling motivated once again to begin an exercise routine. I got about 2 miles of walking in today, with the possibility of another mile a little later.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I feel terrible.  This life has been so impossible for me.  I want to wake up every day and have no fear at all about being my full self.  Everything I do and everywhere I go there will always be that fear in my mind.  I so desperately need to be me at all times.  Something as simple as being able to dress the way I want when I go out every time would be nice.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have gone out dressed the way I want to dress in far off cities.  Sadly I would be attacked if I dressed as myself here.  There was someone else with my same exact situation as I am in that was put in the hospital for dressing in girls clothes.  I hate it.  I want to wear women's clothes all the time.  I feel much more comfortable that way.  The times I went out as myself were the only times I have felt free in my life.  It was an amazing feeling.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sure I guess I am romanticizing it.  When I went out I was wearing lipstick and a dress.  The truth is I have always been female but I have always had to hide it so now I'm not going to do that anymore.  When I went out I wasn't trying to attract anyone.  I was just trying to go out as myself for the first time in my life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
12 minutes ago, JD4010 said:

Right now? Overwhelmed. I need to take a break from everything.

Yes I desperately need a break.  Now that my secret is officially out to the world maybe I can finally get some sleep.  I feel so relieved right now and happy.  It feels like I was just released from prison if I'm being honest.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

To quote A. Lincoln:

 

I am now the most miserable man living. If what I feel were equally distributed to the whole human family, there would not be one cheerful face on the earth. Whether I shall ever be better I can not tell; I awfully forebode I shall not. To remain as I am is impossible; I must die or be better, it appears to me.

 

 

Yeah, that about sums it up :(

Edited by LonelyHiker

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm crying my eyes out right now.  What hurts the most is knowing I have tried to **** myself over my situation.  That hurts a lot.:coopcray:I guess I hope other people out there like me will have the courage I have had.  I'm quite certain that others are going through the same hell I am going through.  I know they are thinking how do I even begin to tell people.  I'm sure people think why did I even have to say this.  Why would someone choose to say what I have said about myself.  It takes a lot of nerve that's for sure but it makes me feel strong for the first time in my life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...