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knitter

therapy and age

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Yes I belive so. Many of the people that have helped have either been way younger or older than me. Its not necessarily age that always keeps people the tools to help other depressed people. Depression is a heal of a mental state to be in and no matter how old you are when you have it you can relate to othets that do also that have been there. 

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Yes because whos to say when life begins and ends. Define "living" we all have two important things in common when alive and that is life and earth. Being alive at any age can be a difficult thing to grasp. Existence is weird. Were all going to die theres no escaping that. when is the real question. No one really knows when their going to die. Young people die old people die. To say that a young person has more life than the old is to predict the future. If life werw defined by age all of young people would be happy simply because their young. To be alive is to know how to live life in a way that gives you meaning and purpose. To live life feeling happy that youre alivem to be able to make decisions that give your heart fullfillment. Thata what it means to be alive. Life ends when you give up. Im not more alive at 22 than my mom is at 50 because while she strivea everyday to make a better life  I sit at home and wallow in my depression im the one thats dead shes the alive one whos life is just beginning because of her actions.

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can anyone relate to a life that has been lived when they only have a life that is beginning?

Also may I ask are you the 20 someting year old therapist or the 70 year old ?

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42 minutes ago, knitter said:

can anyone relate to a life that has been lived when they only have a life that is beginning?

 

Probably not relate, no. But they can listen, learn and give a fresh look on things.

 

My psychiatrist is from a different culture, older than me and a man. Can he relate on a personal level with me? Highly doubtful.

Can he help me though? He sure is trying!

 

I remember I had a cleaning job during a  summer many years ago, I would have clients who needed the help due to age or disability. Most of my clients were old age pensioners and at the time I was in my early 20's. Some of the clients didn't really need any cleaning done as they didn't move around their house all that much to begin with. What they did need, was a cup of coffee and someone to sit there and listen to them. So that's what I did, I'd clean their home and then I would sit there and listen and ask questions. That was good, it worked for them as I had the interest and it worked for me because I learned a lot.

So yeah, I do think a 20 something year old can help a 70 something year old.

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I am the 70 something. does she have the life experience ? when your 70 you know the end is near.. most people think they have  forever and don't give much thought to it   

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I went to see a therapist who had just recently finished her PhD. The age difference was not as large as you indicate, but she was quite a bit younger than me. That worried me a bit, because she would not have many of the life experiences I have had. On the other hand, she just finished school and is more up-to-date on advancements in the field. I saw her for nearly two years, until I felt I did not need any more therapy at that time. She helped me a great deal.

 

But it is also important to be comfortable with a therapist and feel that you can establish a good rapport. If you don't trust her to help you, she likely won't be able to.

Edited by BrotherZoot

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I am the 70 something. does she have the life experience ? when your 70 you know the end is near.. most people think they have  forever and don't give much thought to it   

Im 22 almost 23 and I think about death constantly. Believe me all ive been thinking about is time aging and death since i was 18.Were all going to die and age. And we never know when death is going to reach us. Is death what scares you ? Because if so I think she might still be able to help you. Im scared of death and my mom  is double my age and she isnt. Im so sorry youre going through this I really hope you feel better soon and youll able to live a peaceful life. Therapist are super helpful I agree with brotherZoot its all about finding a theraphist you feel comfortable with if you feel like your current one isnt helping look for a different one!

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I think it depends on the type of therapy and what you want to get out of it/what you want from a therapist. When I first started trying to find a therapist, I was about 30 and was given an appointment with a woman who was probably about 22 or 23. I was really put off by that at the time and didn't go back for another appointment. Looking back now, I think there were also some other things playing into my uncomfortable feeling with her (like me feeling less successful and embarrassed about that) and she might have been a fine therapist if I had continued. But at the time, she wasn't the right therapist for me, no matter how good of a therapist she was.

Now just last month, I worked with a therapist in an intensive program who was probably also about the same number of years younger than me and also the first male therapist I've ever gone to. I was super nervous about both of those factors, but he ended up being one of the best therapists I've ever had and I wish I could have continued working with him after I finished the program. But besides him just being good at his job, I think he was a good therapist for me at the time because I was doing more skills based therapy (CBT/DBT) and not necessarily psychodynamic ("talk" therapy).

That's my long winded way of saying, yes, I think it is possible for a 20 something therapist to help a 70 something depressed patient. However, it might not be the kind of help you need or in the way that you need right now, or it might just be that that 20 something therapist can't help you specifically, even if they are a good therapist.

If you are not comfortable with this therapist for whatever reason and you have the option of finding a different therapist, there's nothing wrong with that. It's fine to just say that you think the fit isn't right and even ask for referrals to other therapists.

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