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Don't I forget about you.

7 posts in this topic

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I've fought depression for many years, but can only recall little of it. Little of anything. I forget what I did yesterday. Forget words I was seconds from saying. Forget in what years my children were born, and it kills me.

Alzheimer's runs in my family and though I'm thirty, I fear to have it before fifty. For the last year and a half I have been divorced and alone. Spending the rest of my life this way would be miserable, but what is the point of a relationship when every memory will eventually disappear? I've already wasted a decade of someone's life, and refuse to waste any of someone else's. This feeling is further exacerbated by the sense that virtually any woman could do far better than me anyways. 

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No. The doctors I have seen simply guessed that my memory would improve if my depression lessened and prescribed anti-depressants. It has not helped and I don't consider it normal to forget the names of people you've worked with for years within two weeks of leaving a job.

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Oh, my dear, my heart goes out to you for what you fear and are dealing with.  My hope and prayer is that you have consulted with a medical professional regarding the Alzheimer’s that runs in your family. If you would like, I can also recommend to you a free consultation service that perhaps can help with depression.  I am sending love and prayers to you to know you are not alone; please know that God loves you just the way you are and doesn’t want you to shy away from bringing loving people into your life.

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Thank you for the kindness, Susan. I have seen several therapists, including an in-patient stint at a mental health facility. Nothing really helped, though my little girl did save me from myself. She saw the bullet I used to carry. "What's that, Daddy?" I couldn't answer.

I don't really expect this to help. What words could anyone say that would? I just hoped that writing it out for people to see would give me some perspective.

 

 

I am glad that you can draw comfort from God. I never could.

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Wow,  I am sorry. I have seen a family member go through that and it was not fun. Have you given the meds a while to work? Because I know my memory is effected when I am anxious and depressed. I can't concentrate on anything, and it takes a lot for me to think and remember, because I am always so tired .

I hope you find the help and support you need.

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