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talbotann41

Do they deserve dealing with my depression?

8 posts in this topic

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I'm  not sure if the title is okay, what I am trying to say is that I have a family and a boyfriend who support me, but I don't think this is fair for them. I want to die, sometimes I think the best thing I can do is going away from everyone in order they don't have a bad time if I disappear from this world. I don't know what to do, I look for help but it seems nothing can help, the suffering increase with the time and I see how I hurt my family and bf too everytime they watch me in a bad situation.

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Posted · Report post  

Hello Talbotann41,

I understand your pain and desire to disappear.  When we are in a bad state in our depression, we can feel this way.

I'm certain that your family loves you based on the fact that they care and support you when you are down.  You must know that they would be much, much worse if you weren't around.  Good families love and support us in times of trouble, just as you probably do for one of them during a bad time.  The only reason it causes them pain is because they want to see you happy, so they'll keep trying, and you really need to let them.  It is through them that you will probably see some measure of happiness.  

Don't give up!  There are people here who can talk to you and will give support.

Sincerely,

MaddieLouise

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Thanks a lot @MaddieLouise, I really appreciate your words and I understand very well what you say, the thing is I cannot assimilate it, assimilate the fact someone feels bad or sad because of me, and I don't man the decision to finish with my life because I assume they're going to have a hard time dealing with it... it's so confusing. Be well.

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Talbtann41,

When we feel so terrible about ourselves, it's hard to imagine that anyone would love us enough to be hurt by our actions.  I guess it's one of those areas where we have to take a leap of faith and just know it's true.  Logically, why else would they even bother to help you?  That has to tell you something.  Imagine someone you deeply love and care about hurting himself/herself. Wouldn't you feel overwhelmed with sadness, confusion, guilt that everything you did or said, didn't help?

Have you looked into seeing a pdoc or therapist, so you might talk about this with a professional?

Warm regards,

MaddieLouise

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Posted · Report post  

Just psychiatrists, the last one told me to visit a therapist, but still haven't made an appointment, it's funny sometimes how we care and worry about others but don't let them get in into our problems.

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I'm sorry about how you're feeling, and I understand.  I don't want to tell people about my problems, because I don't want to burden those I care about  But I know that I have benefited every time I have told a close friend or a family member

Those in your life truly care about you, and people like that are hard to come by.  I know it's a hard concept to understand, because I couldn't understand it either and I still really don't.

Feel free to talk to anyone here.  We'll support you, too!

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I wish I had more to contribute but I wanted to tell you you're not alone. I struggle with the same thing but have yet to do anything about it. I wish you the best.

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