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rhyl

Intense symptoms from Complex PTSD last few weeks

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I've been dealing with intense symptoms the last several weeks that my therapist reminds me are common with complex PTSD. We've talked about this before, in a vague sort of way, and I know I meet all the criteria, but it (like the depression) has never been so severe or "in my face" has it has been lately. There was an incident at my primary care's office maybe 3 weeks ago that my therapist says was a "trauma reaction," and now I simply cannot go back.  I have had so many traumatic experiences with doctors over the years that I think this one hit me at a bad time and it was just the final straw. 

I am terrified to go back. I think the only way I can see a primary care doctor again is if s/he is someone I know for sure is experienced in dealing with trauma patients. I'm not likely to find that around here. I already can't go back to see a psychiatrist, because of what happened with the last one. I do see a therapist, who I really like, but my trust for him comes-and-goes and has since the incident with the psychiatrist.

I feel like I'm on a very badly operating merry-go-round and that I can't get off.  

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Rhyl, 

So sorry for the ptsd symptoms. I feel like I have ptsd about everything these days. Going to the doctor is wierd and scary enough as it is. I find I am always seeking out female practitioners so I can feel more open about telling them some of my issues if need be. I wonder if taking someone with you might be helpful.  I can relate to the back and forth feelings about therapists. One day its like the best thing and I cant wait to go and the next day I am ambiguous or its like a chore that seems scary just going there. 

sorry I am not more helpful. All I can say is I try to see women doctors only, and  if they suck I try to see someone else. The last time I did not listen to my own wisdom I ended up in a bad place. So take your time. 

Other than that I wish you well. 

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Rhyl,

So sorry to hear this has been going on for you.  I do understand the ebb and flow of PTSDc as well.  I don't know all the details of your history with your psychiatrist and now your general physician but I wonder if you would be able to call the office and ask to speak with the doctor directly?  Or if you are needing to change physicians doing the same with a new physician of your choice?  Explain the situation you are in and your history with PTSD and what you need and if they are willing to provide that.  Just a thought.

Again, sorry you have been triggered and things are so tough right now.  You are in my thoughts

 

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