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Im 18 year old guy Im depressed and sad and everyday since bullying started 5 years ago Im no longer being bullied but they made me realize that Im ugly faced loser no life guy, I have no friends or gf I sit alone in class have been sitting for last 5 years as far as I can remember a girl never sat near me I sit alone in public transport  because people dont want to sit near me I never had female friends I was bullied in school/by my former friends and online mainly for  being ugly and also racial abuse an insults(Im middle eastern) girls always reject me ,I stopped studying since the bullying started I just dont know what to do or how  to deal with this dont tell me Im not ugly or looks dont matter or its about the beauty on the inside because it doesnt help Im so lonely sad and depressed

Edited by BlackDevil

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BlackDevil,

Painful tendinitis is both hands prevents me from writing much today but I just want to say how sorry I am that you are suffering misfortunes which you do not deserve and which are heartbreaking.  You deserve so much more from life than it has given you:  so much more!!!  Forgive me for not writing more, but the pain in my hands is too much now.  You are in my thoughts and prayers!!!

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Hey BlackDevil :grinning:

I was bullied in school too and it's rough, I totally understand. I'm half Lebanese so I'm part middle eastern too. It damages your confidence and self-esteem which can make it hard with girls. 

But just know that your pain stems from within not from lack of girls  Even if you had a great gf you might feel happy at first but that inner pain would eventually poke through to the surface and still be bothering you. So that inner pain must addressed and healed in order for you to feel happier.

I know of guys who we might consider 'ugly' that have done very well with girls. This is not tooting my own horn but I have been told I am fairly good looking guy by a number of women yet I still have struggled to do well with them myself. Even when I go out looking sharp I often feel invisible or get poor reactions from girls. 

It's because I'm virtually always in a sad, low energy state. The few times in my life when my mood was even slightly higher than average and I felt brighter girls are attracted to me like moths to a flame. So I can tell you looks really don't matter. I would say it is a little more important to maintain your 'appearance' though. For example keeping your facial hair well groomed, wearing clean well fitting clothes, make sure your teeth are clean, make sure you smell good etc. 

It's really about your confidence/self-esteem that girls are looking for. So by all means continue to improve your appearance and do what you can to meet someone, but in the meantime work on healing the pain inside you. Because again I can tell you in the past when my mood was higher I couldn't have cared less if I had a girl or not. I had what I needed inside.

Try working on some of these things. There are ancient modalities people have been doing for thousands of years and they work. Especially start doing the 'I love you' exercise. You feel unloved so it's important to direct love into yourself. It will heal and release the painful trapped emotions inside you. It really does work. I am confident you will feel better if you start doing this daily.

Also see if you can find someone on youtube you like listening to for guidance or comfort. I'm sure someone's got a channel related to bullying who you can follow and find support from.

All problems are blessings in disguise. You can't see it now because you're in the thick of it but one day you'll look back and see it was actually a gift that brought you to higher levels that you would never have gotten to had you not experienced what you did. Rest assured that everything is working out perfectly and all is well.

If you ever wanna chat or vent feel free to message me :thumbsup:

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20 hours ago, Epictetus said:

BlackDevil,

Painful tendinitis is both hands prevents me from writing much today but I just want to say how sorry I am that you are suffering misfortunes which you do not deserve and which are heartbreaking.  You deserve so much more from life than it has given you:  so much more!!!  Forgive me for not writing more, but the pain in my hands is too much now.  You are in my thoughts and prayers!!!

Hey Epictetus,

I know this is a side note but if you open google docs and go under the tools tab there is an option called 'voice typing' that writes everything you say. You can open that, say what you want written and then copy and paste to here to save you so much work physically typing.

I hope that helps!

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1 hour ago, durandalblue said:

Hey Epictetus,

I know this is a side note but if you open google docs and go under the tools tab there is an option called 'voice typing' that writes everything you say. You can open that, say what you want written and then copy and paste to here to save you so much work physically typing.

I hope that helps!

While I haven't added anything else to this conversation, Thank you for this information.

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Hey BlackDevil,, how are you doing today? I must say, I have a great deal of experience with being bullied. I have a neurological disorder that when I was a boy, I walked different than others. I got bullied and called names a lot by a lot of people. My depression and self-esteem was shot so I didn't take up for myself near enough. And meeting girls to be with was out of the question. I went blind about 15 years old to add to all this other . I have been with two love 's (girl's) in my life but distance kept us apart. I am now 48 and I never got married or had kid's. One of my greatest fear's is that I am going to die all alone. I stay trapped in the house with my severe depression and my computer. It is no way to live. BlackDevil I'm going to say this to you and it is very important, I don't care if you think that your ugly because that is just a big lie. As far as I'm concerned there are NO ugly people, just ugly beliefs about one's self. I know the bullying is way to much for you and you may just want to give up. But that will change, all things do. It is very hard but you do have to believe in yourself and know that your a good person and that you deserve every thing that it takes to make yourself a better person, inside and out. As for girls, they do really just want a confident, secure and goodhearted man that will listen to them and build them up. A lot of girls are more insecure than you will ever be. So please take a leap of faith and look yourself in the mirror and know that person staring back is just an 18 year old young man with a totally awesome future ahead...Be Good To Yourself...

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BlackDevil, I find several things utterly repulsive: being treated with disrespect for one's looks, for one's race/ethnicity, and being bullied for any reason.  I cannot be the only female who does not care about a person's looks.  I don't believe in "ugly" or people being rated for how hot they are, like on a scale from 1-to-10.  How superficial can someone get.  You are not a loser.  Just because others have made you feel this way has no bearing on anything.  You are a person, a human being, who merits and needs respect at all times.  You're very young, and I have to tell you, life can change for the better.  I know there are many guys here who feel badly because they don't have a girlfriend.  This does not make you any less of a person.  I see no connection.  As usual, I feel helpless in trying to find the right words.  I'm no wizard, I just wanted to echo what others have said far better than I ever could.

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