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Lindsay

The "How Do You Feel Right Now?" (4)

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I thought this would be a good day, but I woke up sad, got better, then got sad again and now I'm just angry. What the f? I hate these mood swings and how over sensitive I am. Oh crap.

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1 hour ago, sairyss said:

i feel like crying... dont know why i try anymore .......

I don't like that you feel like crying. I wanted to let you know I read your post.

There will be better days. 

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An online game I'd played for years recently had some server issues and was completely non-working for like 5 months.

Now it's back and I'm happy about that, but what a timesuck it is!

Today I'm going to try to keep in my head that I cannot second-guess my spouse. If he looks "cross," or "annoyed," he may be frowning because he needs bifocals, or he pulled something while exercising, or the fresh-from-the-garden cucumber was bitter.

So, to tally: I'm happy about my game, wary about my time, trying not to be too much of a people-pleaser today.

@scienceguy, have I told you how much I enjoy reading your signature quote? 

 

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1 hour ago, MarkHollywood said:

eating a rotisserie chicken makes me feel like such a carnivore

I'm a carnivore and I love rotisserie chicken.

Don't have to cook it. It's tender. It will make at least 5 servings and if I get to the grocery early enough, the smoked flavor is still plentiful!

 

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My friends aggravating me he said he wants to hang out. then I say sure just let me know when your free than doesn't answer my message last time he did it he replied 3 months later asking the same thing ***. I don't even really want to hangout with him we don't have much in common any more I only do it because I feel bad when I reject someone.

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6 minutes ago, Dolphin2013 said:

An online game I'd played for years recently had some server issues and was completely non-working for like 5 months.

Now it's back and I'm happy about that, but what a timesuck it is!

Today I'm going to try to keep in my head that I cannot second-guess my spouse. If he looks "cross," or "annoyed," he may be frowning because he needs bifocals, or he pulled something while exercising, or the fresh-from-the-garden cucumber was bitter.

So, to tally: I'm happy about my game, wary about my time, trying not to be too much of a people-pleaser today.

@scienceguy, have I told you how much I enjoy reading your signature quote? 

 

I forgot my quote after a few months and I just looked at it right now and it still makes me so optimistic and hopeful what game were you playing dolphin.

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well i sent a message to my boyfriend because he has barely talked to me in the past week... im trying to be understanding loving caring and compassionate to the fact that he was in 72hr psych eval last week... since last week he has messaged me 3 times and has not called... i downloaded the dating app that we met on and this is the message i sent him....

 

andrew i just need to know what is going on... you have barely talked to me since wednesday when everything happened,,, im trying to be caring and supportive... i want to be there for you and help you... i think you have sent me a total of three text messages .... you asked me to delete this app when we started dating and i did... well i reinstalled it to see if you were on so i might be able to talk to you and as soon as i say hi andrew its kenny you logged off ... i knw you must feel embarrassed or ashamed about wednesdaybut you dont know this but i already been thru this with my mom.. there is nothing to be ashamed of... if you dont wanna date me or talk to me... just atleast give me the decency of letting me know whats going on ... ok?

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7 hours ago, RiverLight said:

:console:I have felt that way, too, Lady. I went through a deep depression this week and couldn't have cared less if I died today/tomorrow.. I was hoping to go peacefully though, obviously that is most ideal. Anyways, my dear, you are alive, you are surviving each and every day despite your feelings, and you have your physical health...at least you have your physical health! Maybe take a walk to the river today, get outside, enjoy the fresh air, and maybe it will revive you a little. And give that dog of yours a big hug!!!! :console: Hope you feel better, and hope that therapy helps today. I know it usually does help you...

Therapy was OK. I was not really into it today. I am actually considering maybe stopping it and the psychiatrist too. Just stay home in bed all day, everything is useless, so what's the point?

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I know that every woman thinks I'm an ugly-@$$ creep. But at least I'm bright enough to figure it out.

I can feel the negative vibes. I'd have to be out of my mind to miss it. I know I could never win, but I do know the game.

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5 hours ago, salparadise6132 said:

Praying for a miracle.

Just when it looked like some things might be getting better for me, trigger, trigger, trigger, four since Monday alone.  Four events that have shaken me.  I am terrified that I won't be able to get back to work and will lose my job.  I am lonely.  I am besieged.  It is all falling in on me, all the walls in the world, and the ceilings and the trees and the mountains, too.  There just seems to be no escape.

That how I am feeling right now.  But hopefully, with a miracle, I will be able to choose not to dwell on these feelings, and will be able to pick myself up.  It's just that I am so worried I won't be able to.

Brian

Anxiety is so painful.  It projects us into a potentially horrible future and ruins the present.  I trust you will see it for what it is and recover quickly.

I, too, am lonely.  I have no friends in this town who are my age, and though I have joined a couple of groups in town, I've made no real connection with anyone.  My friends are far away and I don't contact them because I feel like I bring nothing to the table.  They all have jobs, at least, and I feel like such a drag saying that I have nothing like that right now, and health issues, and blah-blah-blah.  I bore myself to death.  What would I do to them?  I got an unexpected windfall of money (just a couple thousand dollars), which will help me survive the next couple of months without living off my parents.  But, I'm disappointed that I wasn't able to schedule a meetup of people here at DF, and think I'll make that trip by myself (I love a roadtrip and staying in a hotel).  I just wish there was more in Ohio (nature-wise) that I found beautiful, as nature is a great healer for me. 

Anyway, my dear, you don't need a miracle.  You just need that subtle shift that turns the dark to light and then lighter and then you'll keep right on steppin'!

Love,

WOTL

 

Edited by womanofthelight
grammar grammar spelling

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People ask me if I have a girlfriend or that why don't I go open up a profile on dating sites. What a joke!!

I may not be able to catch with anyone. But considering how people view me, it's a miracle that I was able to keep a job the amount of time that I had.

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Hugs to all who need them. :console:

 

I'm feeling down about the rudeness I've seen on some of the threads here.  I understand that many people here feel hopeless, but it seems like some are crapping on people for having some sort of hope, and that's not right. 

I've chosen to look for positives in situations.  I sometimes fail at it, but I'm doing my best.  I don't see why other people feel the need to dump on those who are just trying to have a good day now and then and hopefully get better.  (To clarify...I know why they feel the urge to do it, I just don't know why they feel like they have a right to.)

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3 hours ago, Fenris89 said:

I thought this would be a good day, but I woke up sad, got better, then got sad again and now I'm just angry. What the f? I hate these mood swings and how over sensitive I am. Oh crap.

i have them too, unfortunately.

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Like complete sh!t... it's been a long time since I've had such a bad day as this one. 

One of those days when everything goes wrong and it just keeps on happening.

Edited by Aki Sky

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3 hours ago, Dolphin2013 said:

@RiverLight I loved that green photo. So green. I love green. It's my favorite. All shades, tints, it makes me happy.

Green is the color of the heart chakra, and I'm sure it's not accidental that green is your favorite color.  You have much heart, Dolphin, and share it generously.

 

4 hours ago, MarkHollywood said:

eating a rotisserie chicken makes me feel like such a carnivore

Ah yes, I'm one of those people who likes to eat something that walked the earth.  (I eat chicken almost every day; other than that it's fish.)

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I am feeling odd. Like, I feel okay one min and then kind of blah the next. I am excited about going out this morning though. It is time for my little doggy girl to get her nails done and as I have stated before I love going places with her. I picked out her dress to wear out and she is going to look fantastic. I love that she loves to wear clothes as much as I love to dress her up. When it is time for her to find a new outfit to wear she gets very excited. Today she is wearing a lovely pink and polka dot dress with a bow and a gem on it. :icon12: We are then going to The Christmas Tree Shop to see if they have any Halloween stuff there. I was married on Halloween and it is my all time favorite holiday ever!

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Im pretty mad bitter just told my sister I get  jealous of her. She has always been one of those people who have a bunch of friends she is always on the phone and I hear her all day through her door having a ball. Makes me miesarble I honestly feel like getting in my car holding my finger out and flipping everyone off while im driving, telling everyone  I ever new from highschool college that has a better life then me to go **** themselves. I want to start ranting about how I hate mylife and how its not fair I ended up like this.  Borderline personaility disorder sucks!! No body has given a about me in years in my life and it has turned into unbearable bitterness and jealousy

Edited by scienceguy

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