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The "How Do You Feel Right Now?" (4)


Lindsay

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Returned to work last weekend, feels good to be on full time pay again as I had the bill for my surgery to pay. $1266 dollars, almost a month of work but I'll make up for it. Had my first DJ gig last night since my surgery which felt good. One bad thing to note though is the hernia surgery didn't clear up all of pain issues. I still have the varicocele bothering me which means another visit to see a urologist. The pain from it came back right around half way through my second day back at work. To help I'm taking rutin and horse chestnut extract for a few weeks. If that doesn't help the varicocele heal on its own then I guess that will be my next surgery.

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My right shoulder hurts. The pain is coming from inside.   This has been going on for four weeks and I did not tell my doctor as yet.  

I had a bad night.  I did not sleep at all.   Thursday afternoon I went for a short walk then I had a nap.   Later I went to Starbucks and met my friend.  We then went to the Next Act Pub.  The server Sky missed me and she was happy to see me.  She had been asking my friends about me and my health.

Shower and shave.   Now watching tv and about to do some home work from my group therapy.

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My sister whom I share a house with is very angry all the time.  Yesterday my brother in law came and after he left my sister was swearing and in a rage.   She wiped down all the door handles and the toilet and cleaned the inside of the front door because it was damp from his shoes.   It is crazy.   Everyday my sister is in a rage.   This is not helping me and my anxiety and depression.

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I am trying to lose weight. Last week I had 254 pounds and I want to drop down to 200.   I had 261 last month so I guess I am on the right track.    Today I see I have gained two pounds.  OUCH!   I want to lose weight not gain weight.

Back in 2013 I lost some fifty pounds in two months and kept it off until I started taking Effexsor then I had massive weight gain.

Any advice appreciated.

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5 hours ago, duck said:

I am trying to lose weight. Last week I had 254 pounds and I want to drop down to 200.   I had 261 last month so I guess I am on the right track.    Today I see I have gained two pounds.  OUCH!   I want to lose weight not gain weight.

Back in 2013 I lost some fifty pounds in two months and kept it off until I started taking Effexsor then I had massive weight gain.

Any advice appreciated.

Fast in the morning and at night.  I restrict my eating to the period from 11 a.m. to 7:00 p.m., though I will allow apples and a few walnuts sometimes.  It really works.  It's hard for a couple of weeks, but your body adjusts.  I really got my weight under control by following this regime for a few months.

Edited by One More Red Nightmare
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I got into a huge argument with my mom last night. I didn't go the support group. I cried all night. Today I am feeling that type of exhaustion when you have cried so much and your body and spirit is just tired.  I said a lot of mean things to my mom. We were all so stressed over my brother. I feel like a horrible person.

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5 hours ago, One More Red Nightmare said:

Fast in the morning and at night.  I restrict my eating to the period from 11 a.m. to 7:00 p.m., though I will allow apples and a few walnuts sometimes.  It really works.  It's hard for a couple of weeks, but your body adjusts.  I really got my weight under control by following this regime for a few months.

 

 Also--limit carbs drastically. Anything made from grain-based flour is going to turn into sugar, which your body will use for energy instead of raiding your "fat stores". The times I have been successful in losing weight were the times when I went as "carb free" as possible. I'm trying to do that again, along with upping my walking. I'm off to a very slow start though. :(

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I'd like to think my relationship is back on track. We are at least talking every day. I'm right up front telling her how much I love her. But I don't want to "overdo" it so that it sounds insincere. Because it ain't. I'm absolutely in love with her.

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10 hours ago, duck said:

I am trying to lose weight. Last week I had 254 pounds and I want to drop down to 200.   I had 261 last month so I guess I am on the right track.    Today I see I have gained two pounds.  OUCH!   I want to lose weight not gain weight.

Back in 2013 I lost some fifty pounds in two months and kept it off until I started taking Effexsor then I had massive weight gain.

Any advice appreciated.

Not sure if it's good advice, but Wellbutrin's side effect is weight lose. Not sure what kind of meds you're taking if you're taking any.

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On 2/2/2017 at 2:51 PM, LonelyHiker said:

Yeah, little dogs can be weird and a bit annoying lol. Pugs are an exception for me ...LOOOVVVVEEE that breed, and used to own two. I'd get another one, if they hadn't gotten so popular (and expensive). 

On a completely different tangent, my Xmas tree is still up on Groundhog day...Does that make me pathetic? Thinking about just leaving it up til next Xmas lol...

Mine would probably still be up too if I'd put one up.  I didn't bother with decorations, because I knew I was being evicted, and it would just be more stuff to mess with.  Plus it's hard to decorate a home you know you won't have much longer...it's just painful.

My mom's dog is a mix.  I really like miniature schnauzers because of how sassy they are.  I had a mini once, and she was fun and entertaining, not neurotic.  Unfortunately, her physical health wasn't good, and she died young.  I still miss her.  She wasn't particularly affectionate, but she was always doing stuff that made me laugh.

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3 hours ago, VictorianGoth said:

I got into a huge argument with my mom last night. I didn't go the support group. I cried all night. Today I am feeling that type of exhaustion when you have cried so much and your body and spirit is just tired.  I said a lot of mean things to my mom. We were all so stressed over my brother. I feel like a horrible person.

Try not to be too hard on yourself, VG.  :console:

I hope you will get some rest.

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I had been doing considerably better for a number of months. I wasn't doing great, but I felt more human and less anxious.  Now I feel myself slipping again.  Feelings of impending doom are returning, and I'm feeling more and more disassociated from people and the world. I feel like my mind is slipping away, and it scares me a lot.  

I'm also terribly worried about my 22 year-old daughter.  She lives with her mother, goes to school part time.  But she doesn't work and barely leaves her room.  I see signs of mental illness in her, and it breaks my heart. I know this curse was passed down from me. :(   Schizophrenia and depression run in my family.  I fear she'll never be independent. 

3 weeks ago I quit smoking green stuff. I had been a daily smoker for years. I actually feel a lot worse since I quit. Maybe I should go back. 

Life is so easy for a lot of people, it seems. For a lot of us on here, it's such a struggle. And the world is so effed up and divided. What a mess.

 

Edited by One More Red Nightmare
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Yesterday when I got home I started to feel some burning kind of sensation on my left side kind of like the same feeling I had on my right side before I had my hernia surgery. Seeing a doctor next week and if I did indeed tear another hernia then I am going for workers compensation this time around. I may have to start seriously looking for another main job because I can't afford nor should I be hurting myself or having surgeries because of my job.

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