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Lindsay

The "How Do You Feel Right Now?" (4)


14,429 posts in this topic

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I'm down to 152 pounds now and I still look in the mirror and think I'm fat.  The madness of this never has an end to it.  Am I really going to let myself get into the 140s?

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On 10/4/2017 at 11:13 PM, CoolCat7 said:

I'm planning to write a novel for NaNoWriMo in November.  But I need feedback - I'm struggling with which one to write.  1) A fairly lighthearted teen Fantasy book or 2) a book about 3 siblings struggling with an extremely and emotionally abusive father, based on my life.  The 2nd book is one I've wanted to write my whole life, and if I found out I were dying of cancer, I would want to write.  Writing it fairly quickly is appealing because it is so emotionally heavy.  But I am recently back to work and struggling with that, and I'm not sure I should be taking on an emotionally laden project. 

I would go with option 1) Write a lighthearted teen romance.   You mentioned going back to work and the emotional expense- seems like it would be a lot.  As a fellow writer, I would probably work on the story about your life when you have more time to succumb to the emotions. 

*****

As for how I am feeling today, it's been up and down. I am in the middle of an episode for sure. I have been so mean to family members for no reason. Just snapping. I'm so irritated at myself. All I've done for the past three days is sleep.  I called off of work on one of those days and did nothing but sleep. Just too depressed to do anything else. 

Edited by VictorianGoth

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Yes winter used to be fun.  There was sled riding and driving on snowy roads like the dukes of hazzard but now I am grown up and actually care if I wreck the car I'm driving.  I'm still a great driver but I actually have common sense now.

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Overwhelmed.

Turkey isnt thawing (the effer)

House is a mess. 

I still work today

Company coming tomorrow

Thabjsgiving dinner is tomorrow

Turkey isnt thawing

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3 hours ago, Natasha1 said:

Overwhelmed.

Turkey isnt thawing (the effer)

House is a mess. 

I still work today

Company coming tomorrow

Thabjsgiving dinner is tomorrow

Turkey isnt thawing

I am with you, Natasha.  I am also hosting family tomorrow and am busy today, will be baking until late tonight.  I just want to sleep!

Good luck with it.   Turkey Freezicles could by a new Thankgiving thing!

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18 hours ago, sober4life said:

I'm down to 152 pounds now and I still look in the mirror and think I'm fat.  The madness of this never has an end to it.  Am I really going to let myself get into the 140s?

I have to shed 30 lbs. All I need to do is step up the exercise. A lot. Right now, 2 blocks is about it for me. Maybe 3.

Edited by JD4010

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5 hours ago, JD4010 said:

I have to shed 30 lbs. All I need to do is step up the exercise. A lot. Right now, 2 blocks is about it for me. Maybe 3.

I go running every morning.  I start before sunrise and run 5 or 6 miles.  I'm at the top of my game physically.  Mentally is a different story.  I'm never well mentally but I'm used to it.

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26 minutes ago, sober4life said:

I go running every morning.  I start before sunrise and run 5 or 6 miles.  I'm at the top of my game physically.  Mentally is a different story.  I'm never well mentally but I'm used to it.

I love working out. I go to Zumba class and stay in the back. I watch all the women dancing to the great music and I feel better.

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Finished. My "family and friends" can go to hell. As a matter of fact, so can I.

I don't give a **** what happens after life, it's better than this. I can't wait for that day when my life's done.

Nobody, including me, can convince me that life is worth living. No one can be trusted anyway.

Nobody, in real life or on DF, will have to deal with me anymore.

 

- KS

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8 hours ago, duck said:

I love working out. I go to Zumba class and stay in the back. I watch all the women dancing to the great music and I feel better.

Sounds like fun.:Coopwink:  I've been thinking about joining a dance class and also trying to learn some type of martial arts to protect myself as well.  I have a very healthy heart but I neglect everything else really.  

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This morning I woke up and started thinking about Natalie, Kayleigh and a few other women I had crushes on, asked out and got turned down or just never bothered to ask because of living inside my head all the time. So I'm here at work depressed because of that. Christine walked by, smiled at me but I don't know if I'll talk to her. I guess me wanting to be with someone and wanting to have a girlfriend is just wishful thinking. Like a lot of things are. Keeps making me just want to die.

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5 hours ago, KidSurvivor2011 said:

Finished. My "family and friends" can go to hell. As a matter of fact, so can I.

I don't give a **** what happens after life, it's better than this. I can't wait for that day when my life's done.

Nobody, including me, can convince me that life is worth living. No one can be trusted anyway.

Nobody, in real life or on DF, will have to deal with me anymore.

 

- KS

KS please don't say that to yourself... You ARE worth more than you realise. If people are treating you wrong, they should go to hell. Karma will get them in the end. Trust me, I feel the same way as you do... "It will never get better..." "depression is just getting worse..." "my life will just get worse..." "people hate me...." "getting help doesn't work..." "I'd be better off dead..." etc It's a huge struggle dealing with mental illness day by day... It just wears you down. Pair that with a horrible life, that just tears you apart and you feel hopeless/unworthy of living. I could never let people convince my life would get better or is worth living like you... Last week, I was so going to end it all... Like really... I don't know what you're going through in your life but I understand how you are feeling. 

But you DO have the power to pull through... You just don't realise it yet because of your current situation... It will take time... Maybe even years but you will get there. Small baby steps at a time. You will be free. You life will then be better and much easier to manage. A good therapist will help you through your journey. If your current therapist/doctor don't work, find a new one... Anyway *hugs to you* We members at DF forums are here to help. You're NOT a hassle to us, we love helping people out. Yes you may not listen to my advice... I'm a newbie junior so... I am aware nobody can convince you but I responded to your post anyways because I care...  x :hugs:

Edited by babyxgothxx

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I was born into a wrong century.

I feel guilty and ashamed to be naturally more quiet and introverted than most people. I feel like I should be something that I'm not. I value own time and space so much and dislike useless small talk. Why I didn't born to be like everyone else?

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On 2017-10-06 at 8:16 PM, VictorianGoth said:

I would go with option 1) Write a lighthearted teen romance.   You mentioned going back to work and the emotional expense- seems like it would be a lot.  As a fellow writer, I would probably work on the story about your life when you have more time to succumb to the emotions. 

*****

As for how I am feeling today, it's been up and down. I am in the middle of an episode for sure. I have been so mean to family members for no reason. Just snapping. I'm so irritated at myself. All I've done for the past three days is sleep.  I called off of work on one of those days and did nothing but sleep. Just too depressed to do anything else. 

Thanks for the feedback.  :)

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21 hours ago, JD4010 said:

I have to shed 30 lbs. All I need to do is step up the exercise. A lot. Right now, 2 blocks is about it for me. Maybe 3.

I hear you.  My next big project is to lose weight.

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