Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Hi all, new around these parts :)

I'm 25 years old and I'm pretty sure I've depression all my life. It wasn't officially diagnosed until last summer and life has been slowly improving with the help of medication and talk therapy, so I'm managing. But I always wonder if I'll ever really truly be happy like "normal people" because I don't have a bad life. I go to a great university, I have a well paying job (that I dislike in some ways, but that's another topic all together), wonderful family and friends and a loving and supportive boyfriend. Logically speaking, there's nothing on the surface that makes my life seem terrible. But I feel like just hiding away and never coming out almost all the time. I feel like I'm a burden to my friends and family and boyfriend (well...not so much to boyfriend, he's the most understanding person out of my group of people, but I still can't help but feel he doesn't deserve the mess that is me). I feel like I'm the stupidest student in my program and that I'm not cut out for my major (dietetics, for those curious); body image issues (I'm overweight, though I have lost some pounds!) plus the constant feelings of being judged for that weight I carry by my peers is very discouraging. I flunk one exam or do poorly on one assignment and I have to fight the urge to just quit. AND on top of it all, I need to keep up a happy face for my mother, who always feels like she's at fault for my feelings and that if she just tries harder, I'll feel better to avoid any drama and problems. 

In a nutshell, I feel like I'm constantly in a corner. I want to reach out for help and support, but a part of me just...can't do it/won't do it/is afraid to do it/I don't really know.

I need a safe place to vent, to feel as though someone understands me and my problems outside of my therapist's office (because lol college doesn't leave a lot of time for therapy) and I want to help support others as well. I look forward to meeting and talking with you all!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Welcome aboard to our depression forum. This is great place for venting and maybe even some inventing.

We all have some insights and we need input from anyone willing to offer it.

Depression /caves can be sheltering and comforting but a depression/cave is not a place to fool around. 

Keep posting and check out the other posts. We are here for you and you are not alone with depression issues.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

:welcomeani:CatDeeDeeDee, I think you will find it "relaxing" and safe to talk about some of your problems, here, in our forums. I'm glad to hear that you already are in therapy because that may probably be your ticket either out of depression or to live better with your depression if it is "deep-rooted". It's OK to be overweight. If you want to change that, please do it for your own sake and not for others. 

All the best

Rose 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hello.  I'm new too and I'm about the same age as you too (I'm 25). I feel for you.  It sounds like you have a somewhat stable life.  That's a positive.  And universities have free resources, I'm glad you're using them!  That's something I didn't take full advantage of when I was in school.  Anyways, see you on the forums!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ms. Cat,

     Howdy and welcome! I'm sorry you feel the way you do. I'm going to try to ease into my response because I don't want you to think that I'm being rude or anything. I have sat for a moment after reading this thread to think about things and this is what I came up with.

     First, being in therapy is always a good thing. There are other ways of 'unloading' or venting without being a bother to anyone or it even costing anything. One is to take all of the things that are bothering you, whether it be people upsetting you now, or from the past, a comment from a stranger, a look of disgust from another,...doesn't matter what is bothering you, and simply write it on a piece of paper then throw it in the garbage. It's kind of like the talk therapy without someone listening. It worked wonders for me for over 7 years when I was in foster care.

     Second, you're always welcome here to vent, talk, chat or 'unload' anytime. I'm sure you'll find almost anything and everything you could ever imagine about depression or anything related. Odds are you'll find a few friends as well.

   Third, I understand, in more ways than 1, about the losing weight. This is where I may get a little long winded...lol. At one time in my life, I was 60 pounds over weight. You may not think that is that much, but we're in different shoes with different medical issues. I have more physical issues than mental or psychological.

    Without telling you how to run your life, I'd like for you to consider something and then try it. If you try it I can almost guarantee that you'll feel 5 times better than you have in the past 10 years all combined. You can think of it as either a reset or a cleansing. You may think it's not possible but it is and without too much heartache. Erase everything in your mind about what you've heard that was healthy for you, no matter the source. The reason is, is that the best teacher is experience, not someone being paid a salary or someone that has been misled. This will also help your mental state as well, being more positive and having the feeling of being fulfilled or with a purpose.

    You're not going to like it. I understand it may be hard because of school or college being time consuming. But I feel you need to completely change your mindset about everything you either use or consume from anywhere, no-matter there use.

     This is the challenge for 30 days:

     Extract any and all things that you use or consume that isn't 100% organic. This includes soaps, shampoos, clothes cleaner, dish cleaner, any type of chemical that comes from a 'manufacturer'. Stop eating any ketchup and whole wheat bread from all of the gluten in it. Those are the worst of the gluten filled foods. Extract all of the sugar from your diet if you can. Sugar is the number 1 cause of bone inflammation in the world. Your body can metabolize cabbage in a way that your body will think of as sugar.

     You'll also need to only eat, if possible, organic foods. Keeping in mind this also means anything with GMO's in it, (Genetically Modified Organisms). Any and all things the body can and will consume is what I'm talking about.

    Ms. Cat, if you do these simple, sort of, things, I promise you'll feel like you never have in your life because you've consumed or used poisons for all of it. If you do it honestly, without smudging or cheating, you know I'm right. Give it a try. You just may amaze yourself and your family. I wish you all the best and let us know what happens please.

 

                                                                                                                   Sincerely,

                                                                                                                   Curtis  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 4/29/2016 at 8:29 AM, CatDeeDeeDee said:

 Hi and welcome! You're definitely in the right place! I totally understand the college lifestyle and how you feel that you don't have time for therapy, but speaking as someone who greatly benefited from it, I highly recommend it. Maybe you could start with phone counseling, as that  might be easier? I know Focus on the Family offers   free phone consultation with licensed counselors. If you feel comfortable telling the counselor what area you are located in, he/she might even be able to direct you to a good local counselor or support group. If you call 1-855-771-4357 you can talk to someone! Just make sure you call between 6a-8p Mountain Standard Time. And if no one answers, you can leave a message so someone can call you back. And in the meantime, keep posting! A lot of us are ready and waiting to encourage you :Coopyahoo:

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Welcome here and I hope that you like it here!

I do think that you might be taking things a little too hard on yourself.. you're not at fault for everything, and sometimes these things just happen. When we're growing up... we can deal with hormones , feelings, love and sometimes the mixture of emotions can just create a mood which makes you want to escape from everything that creates pressure. To deal with it, I suggest getting involved in more fun stuff, perhaps some parties or good , nice fun like gaming, sports and the like. The more things you have to look forward to, the better things will be because they'll take your mind off your body image issues, and sports will also enable you to work towards building a healthy self-esteem and happiness in the future. I also think that the people who judge you are in some way jealous of the company and the good life you have : That's why they make such an effort to ruin your day because of jealousy or anger .. these two are powerful forces, and it's better for you to not really care too much about them ( be wary if they've any schemes or any of the sort, though ) because they probably do this to everyone they're jealous about. Also, reading or listening to more instrumental music can help you calm your mind down and not think too much about what others think of you: Rather, remember that those who like you for who you are will appreciate you regardless of your circumstances and appearance: They want you as who you are right now, and you're clearly a nice person. Offering to help others around here and wanting to make a positive difference clearly shows that.

I do understand wanting a private place to vent: If you have any worries or negative thoughts on your mind... we want to hear them and help you deal with them because you deserve happiness and nothing less. I think that some of the activities I suggested to you will definitely also enable you to get to know even more people: Leading to you having even more bosom friends that you can share happy moments with in the future. There's no reason to be fearful: Things are getting better and if you allow it to improve, then you'll be really really happy. 

Most of all, you wanting to help other people definitely shows that you're anything but a burden. You're a blessing, and nothing less than that. You're probably a friend who won't let other people down, and that kind of friend usually stays loyal... you're a blessing to people, and you should be proud of yourself. You've the power to make people happy and you want to exercise it! 

If you need any advice for any of your worries or problems, we'll always be around for you! 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

×
×
  • Create New...