Jump to content

At what age did depression first affect you?


ejc

Recommended Posts

Depression/bi-polar disorder runs in my family. but, I wasn't plagued by depression until 32 (I'm 34 now). .. so, now I wonder, how old were you when depression first plaited you and what do you believe triggered it? 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

probably about 9 or 10,I think I was triggered by my grandmother who I was close to get put in prision for speeding away from a cop and crashing into a house,my dad would always degrade me and threaten to physically abuse me.I was a only child to and my siblings were just born so I probably wasn,t use to sharing the attention from my mother.I don,t think I have been content with my life for a single day since then.I don,t want to talk to my family anymore most of them are toxic people.Depression and bipolar run in my family my grandmother is bipolar and I am sure my father is a narcissist or a sociopath.

Edited by scienceguy
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My depression has always manifested more physically for me than emotionally, so I think I've had it since early high-school.  I didn't see a Dr and get a Dx until I was 30. As for a trigger, well I took Wellbutrin to stop smoking and all the sudden life was different.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

22 minutes ago, Wisteria said:

I already had suicidal thoughts in age of 9 or 10, so probably then...

Hi Wisteria, 

I am sorry to hear that you were feeling this way so young, but you are not alone. 

I remember when I was about six years old, I was watching the news with my Mema and there was a story of a woman who had tried to k*** her child. I asked my Mema if that woman was trying to have an abortion, and despite her shock, she told me no and asked what I thought that meant. I remember telling her that my mom told me that she wished she would have had one and that I knew it meant to k*** a baby. 

I think that is the first time I remember feeling depressed. 

Edited by Rae81
Link to comment
Share on other sites

33 minutes ago, Rae81 said:

Hi Wisteria, 

I am sorry to hear that you were feeling this way so young, but you are not alone. 

I remember when I was about six years old, I was watching the news with my Mema and there was a story of a woman who had tried to k*** her child. I asked my Mema if that woman was trying to have an abortion, and despite her shock, she told me no and asked what I thought that meant. I remember telling her that my mom told me that she wished she would have had one and that I knew it meant to k*** a baby. 

I think that is the first time I remember feeling depressed. 

Yeah, no one took mom seriously (health care people etc.) when she said that her daughter who is 10 years old wants to hurt herself... ;___; I wonder how different or ''healthy'' I would be now if they would have taken care of the issue many years ago.

I'm so sorry to hear that! :hugs: 

Edited by Wisteria
Link to comment
Share on other sites

24 minutes ago, standup said:

I can remember feeling high anxiety in childhood. At first, it may have manifested as shyness, but by the time I got to middle school, I remember feeling anxiety about finishing my schoolwork to the point that I would lose my appetite. The depressive symptoms didn't start until high school.

I remember having anxiety over having anxiety.

I still have anxiety over having anxiety - it can be a vicious cycle.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 minutes ago, standup said:

Absolutely. I still experience that, but I know more about the disease now, so it doesn't bother me as much because I don't beat myself up over it as much....Back when I didn't know what was going on, I viewed it more as a personal defect. Now, if I catch myself having anxiety over having anxiety, I can at least deal with it better.

I have not made it as far as you have. I still feel like I am defective. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think there was a shift to a more extreme scale when I was in middle school. A friend of mine had mentioned it to me, the contrast in how bitter I had gotten. The overall shift in just how I carried myself. Now I look back and try to remember what I was like before that shift but it seems rather lost to time. I'd always been a rather shy, and seemingly rather down trodden, individual though as I was raised in an unhealthy environment. There was this wall hanging in our home that said "If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn. If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive. If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy. If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy. If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty." It's much longer and there are other lines that are more positive in nature but these were the ones that in my youth I felt resounded with me. My grandmother at one point said that I seemed to always have sad eyes. I saw my first therapist in middle school as well, but she had been highly religious and I was young and fearful enough that I just didn't open up to her. I lied, told her the suicidal 'threat' I had made so to speak was just taken the wrong way. That I was misinterpreted and hadn't meant what I said. Sometimes I wonder how different things might be now if I had just told the truth and trusted that therapist all those years ago. Nevertheless, i'm not sure of the exact age to speak of but I know the most noticeable shift was in middle school. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It started when I was quite young, my mother was emotionally disrupt she was bipolar but always refused to acknowledge the fact that she was.   My father was a wonderful men but unfortunately due do his work not really present at home.  I also have an older brother that for me is like an alien yep! nothing whatsoever in common with him.  So I spend my childhood raised by my mother who was flip flopping in her constant mood swing one day she was the best mother and the next someone that I would run away from.  Also being ADHD, the way my mother was with me confused me enormously for a very long time.  She was constantly telling me that I had a problem because I was ADHD, but also was convincing me not to take any medication, Yea go figure.  I'm the one when I turn 18, who went to seek for help and was diagnose with ADHD at that time it was absolutely no surprise to me.

I recently cut the rope toward a whole bunch of family members uncles, aunts, cousins and my brother as well ( mother and father are passed away ).  I don't want to say that they are the cause of me being so anxious and at time depressed but their negativity and unwillingness to seek help for themselves doesn't jive at all with me.  I always new that I was ADHD this is who I am I know that because of this I'm prone to be more anxious or depressed but at least I'm not putting my head in the sand and I'm ready to face the music and do anything in my power to live as happy as I can be.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Elementary school age for me. Probably 8 years old? I always had ADD and procrastinated on almost everything. That hasn't changed. My depression got really bad around 2012, which was when I was 53 years old. I'm better than I was then, at least.

Depression has haunted me for five decades, in other words.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think mine began when I was 18 when my mom went into a major depression which required her to be in a psychiatric facility for three years.  She was no longer my mom during her depression, but a very sad shadow of herself.  I didn't understand but tried to see her as much as I can.  She did come out of it after about four years.  

I don't blame her for mine.  But she had such a severe case, suicidal and such, that I was very scared for her, and angry that no one in the family or her friends stuck by her except for me.  My dad, a great guy, just couldn't handle it and was on business trips a lot.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mine started at 27, i'm 34 now. Mine was brought on by PTSD, Anxiety, and heavy use of alcohol to cope with trying to forget things I had seen. Was under control from about 2010 till this past October, then it lessened it's grip on me a few months ago and I am just dealing with high amounts of anxiety again. :mad1:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think I have always had a tendency for depression, I know it runs in my family, along with anxiety issues.  I think it was triggered by the death of my friend at age 12, and since then a lot of stressful events in the family just compounded it, and then further relationship problems into adulthood seem to have cemented it. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think I was probably about 6 or 7 when I first noticed I wasn't really ever happy.  Probably around 8 or 9 I felt like I didn't want to live anymore.  Somehow, at some point it went away until I hit my early 30's then came back full force.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I was also young probably around 9 or 10.  My dad was constantly putting me down and telling me I wasn't worth a s---.   I remember being left at my grandmothers by my parents, and my grandmother would take these long naps and I would get so bored and felt trapped.  I think back on it sometimes and how I felt then is how I feel now. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I've probably had depression on and off for all 4 years of high school. My mother told me once that she had the same thing when she was in high school. Panic attacks and high  anxiety started happening within the last 2 years. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...