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sober4life

I don't know what to do at this point.

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I've loved a lot of people in my life.  If I could put all of that love together that's how much I love Sarah.  I've never loved anyone more than her in my whole life.  We're good friends.  We go running together.  I talk to her and hang out with her every chance I get.  Every time I see her smile is paradise for me.  I just wish I knew what I could do to make her feel the same way about me.  She obviously cares about me but I'm missing something with her.  I'm usually very confident around people.  I would have no problems being completely candid around the president but when I talk to her I struggle big time.  My heart is beating out of my chest and I'm trying to find the perfect words to say to her but I fall apart sometimes.  She's the woman I love so I don't want to sound like an ***** around her.

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Ha! That's a struggle most of us men can relate to, if we are honest with ourselves. I've always been scared to become serious with women. I'm afraid they will think I'm some kind of clod...which isn't far from the truth. But we can only keep trying. Men and women have been trying to connect for millions of years. It's never been easy. :)

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I treated my best friend like that for 10 years .. We ... Well I got up the courage to leave my husband for him .. 6 months later he broke up with me .. So my advice don't wait , If shes not dating anyone serious take a chance.. 

 

Good luck!

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I know .. I tried to leave my husband , this would have made my third attempt .. Ever since my heart opened to my best friend I have never been able to fix my marriage .. We stay cause the kids right now.  Hes in a job transition so once he gets it , he'll be able to afford the house on his own and we can make an offical divorce .. I love my husband , VERY good guy that I dont deserve, but not in love and he knows everything I have done and it kills me .. Every second

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she's married. not sure what good can come out of that. though realistically, a woman knows when a man is interested and I wonder why she hangs with you, she's .. married. it's an inappropriate relationship that she's allowing to happen.. I say Inapprpriate bc she's doing recreational stuff with someone other than her husband and she's continuing this friendship likely knowing you like her. why drag someone around like that? 

have you considered why you feel so attracted to her? she's the only one that pays attention? only person in your life?  wanting something you can't have? 

if you confess I can see her pushing away or just saying thanks. I feel like you're going to get broken hearted. maybe it's time to create some distance so you're not as emotionally attached. 

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The person I was most crazy for is fabulous. We never got into a relationship but we liked each a lot. Over a period of several years we traveled, wrote letters, hiked in the forest, spent time on the ocean. It just never moved into true involvement. That sometimes haunted me. I finally accepted the fact that sometimes we're not meant to be with the person we have the strongest feelings for. In fact, in some ways I'm glad we never became a couple cuz then we never had to experience the harder, darker side of relationships. We still talk every few years. I still love him a lot....more than anyone I've ever loved. 

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15 hours ago, MEKA said:

I agree with you ejc .. Wish I had those words of wisdom years ago .. Save me alot heartache

I learned it the hard way, not from dating a married man but from a habitual cheater.  in both scenarios, they are emotionally unavailable & get their kicks off the attention they get, of course the attention they want varies in degrees.

sometimes I feel that people have lost the ability to think of others, seems like we live in a society that rewards selfishness.

it's terrible. 

Edited by ejc

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