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Why is it so hard to open up


Ethosa

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Why is it so hard to open up about mental illnesses? Why couldn't it be as easy as going to the doctor for a check up? What's with all this shame being associated with mental illnesses? Why is it whenever my parents see the cuts on my wrist, they get all worked up and angry? "We can't have that in the family! Only pussies do that!" my father would tell me. I'm so afraid of opening up. It's not so simple, it's not the easiest thing to shake off. I want it to stop. I want answers. I want a name for what I'm feeling. I feel so hopeless and trapped. I feel so tired of pretending that I can just shake off this feeling and go about my day like normal.

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Hi Ethosa,

I'm sorry the reaction you're getting from your parents isn't supportive. It seems they've swallowed myths about depression and self-harm and mistaken them for truth. Mental illness doesn't make you weaker than others. On the contrary, coping with symptoms and stigma requires courage and strength that most people don't have to access as they go about their day.

Are you in counseling for depression and self-harm? How long have you felt this way and how long have you been cutting?

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No, I was always shy in opening up topics of me possibly being depressed or anxious. I don't like seeking help from counselors because that would require my parents having to find out. The only time I was able to talk to a counselor was when I got into trouble for cutting my wrists. I went to an all-girls Catholic school when I was in high school, and they don't take so kindly towards these things. I've been told that it's a sinful indulgence. I was forced to agree to get it over with. That encounter did nothing to help me and it's left me feeling even worse about myself. This happened 2 years ago. I've been struggling with self-injury for 4 years.

Thank you for your concern, I really appreciate it.

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6 hours ago, NeatFreakmom said:

Ethosa..I am so sorry about the way people are treating you and your illness! My goodness!  I don't know where you live, but are you able to talk to a counselor without your parents finding out?  

I don't think that's possible. I'm a minor, so I need my parents' consent for pretty much everything. It's just tiring having to hide it everyday, having to pretend that I'm doing swell when I'm really not. I'm afraid to talk to any adult, I feel like every one of them is somehow associated with my parents. I love my parents, but they just don't understand.

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Sorry to hear this;(.  Depending on where U live most medical professionals or social workers will see teens that are still minors confidentially without parental knowledge and consent.  Depending on where U live IT could be as young as age 12 this is available to U.   Health professionals have an ethical code to help their patients.  If possible U might have better luck thru an agency thAt specializes in treatment or support  of teens. Just ask the professional about consent and confidentiality. 

Also don't forget about crisis lines which U can access confidentially. U don't have to be s uicidal crisis to contact If u just need someone to listen or talk to call them. I know I have before and found it helpful. 

im sorry that U seem to be surrounded by a bunch of adults that have a prehistoric view and opinion on mental health because whole they reacted is pretty much the opposite to what leading experts recommend for people self harming. I hope u can connect to somewhere that can give U the understanding and support U need . 

 

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