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The "How Do You Feel Right Now?" Thread (3)


Lindsay

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5 hours ago, RiverLight said:

Hi WOTL! I actually have 26 pics up that includes my bikini shot but much further down. My main profile pic is the girl next door look. I may take the photo off altogether, but for now I'll allow it to remain. Cat pointed out to me that if I use my bikini shot as my main profile shot, that I will get the wrong types of men. so for now, I'll see what it brings me and then decide. BUT, I AM getting responses from the good guys, the genuine guys so it's all a mix which I would expect from online dating anyways.

Thanks for your input!! Hugs to you!


PS where is the thread located?

In the "DF Water Cooler" (Still don't understand how they categorize this stuff.), entitled "Would You Be Interested in a Group Meeting?"  Thanks for the hugs!

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10 hours ago, ladysmurf said:

I get some weirdos writing to me their phone numbers, and I've had some other people ask in the chat option "hey, are you horny?" LoL oh man people are so weird. I didn't go out for breakfast maybe tomorrow, but my dad ordered some Chinese food because he wanted to see me smiling and he knows that's my favorite so that's something I'm grateful for.

It doesn't just happen to women. Pervy weird women contacted me when I was dating. Being pervy or weird isn't just for men.

 

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My body feels electrified, yet my eyes are heavy and I'm both sick and tired. I worked on my costume today and reread a book called 'Hold Still.' I remembered it existed out of the blue yesterday while watching a cat in my backyard. I bought during my middle school years at a Barnes & Noble on a whim. It's funny (in a strange/sad way) how back then, I never understood one of the characters; it was the friend of the main character who was clinically depressed but the main character didn't really notice it. They didn't understand why their friend took their own life. I couldn't understand it. Now, 4 years later, I read the words all over again and I'm overcome with emotion. Because now, I know.

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I have no words for anything anymore. I think the emptiness has finally consumed me entirely. The good news is that my dad finally went shopping after 7 days of eating nothing but french fries, so now there is food here. Something as simple as that is enough to take the pain away.

Ha... maybe it's not so good after all. I thought I lost all my feelings again, but now my eyes are full of tears. That's OK. I think I'll go heat up some food and eat my despair away. I am too sad to live or die anymore, and yet there is still more for me to lose, there is still further to fall down the hole. I will stay down here until I have reached the very bottom. Then I will break through the bottom and float out through the black. Maybe I'll have a nice dream.

Edited by mywarmblood
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41 minutes ago, buttermybiscuit said:

I've downed a million diet cokes over the past week and now my intrusive thoughts (caffeine boosts my anxiety) are more confusing than ever. You keep questioning things you always thought you had the answers to.

I know what you mean.  In my experience, Butter, the thoughts you had when feeling well were/are the correct ones.  Try to trust them and ignore these interlopers!!

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4 hours ago, mywarmblood said:

I have no words for anything anymore. I think the emptiness has finally consumed me entirely. The good news is that my dad finally went shopping after 7 days of eating nothing but french fries, so now there is food here. Something as simple as that is enough to take the pain away.

Ha... maybe it's not so good after all. I thought I lost all my feelings again, but now my eyes are full of tears. That's OK. I think I'll go heat up some food and eat my despair away. I am too sad to live or die anymore, and yet there is still more for me to lose, there is still further to fall down the hole. I will stay down here until I have reached the very bottom. Then I will break through the bottom and float out through the black. Maybe I'll have a nice dream.

Maybe when you float out through the black, there will be a bit of light that gets brighter through your travels.  And back up you go!  That seems to be how it works with this disease.  When you're floating, look up to the sky.

With love and peace --

WOTL

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I had a lot of fun last night. I felt free at last! I danced, got out some energy and felt like myself again. FREEDOM is awesome!!!! No longer do I have to worry about my boyfriend's extreme jealousies and insecurities about my male friends. I reconnected with one of my oldest male friends who is having some pretty major issues in his marriage. So we talked a long time and caught up. I told him about my ex boyfriend issues, too.

I need someone who will feel secure about my male friendships. They are all non-threatening. There is only one that is of potential concern for a male partner, and that's a friendship with someone who has feelings for me. He was there last night too, but took off because my other male friend was dominating my attention. I tried to include my other friend as much as possible, but he is immature and wants all of my attention. That was a problem for my last boyfriend. He refused to hang out with the both of us together. He's a bit possessive of me. I hope this friendship with him does not interfere in any future relationship I have. I worry about that now. He's been a friend for 20 years, so it's hard to just walk away... he's also been there for me through thick and thin, even took me to ER once when I was suicidal. I don't really know what to do about him, though. I don't want him to be a problem again.

Other than that, I am having a rather interesting time on my dating site and am talking to a couple possible prospects. I am weeding out a lot of the bad matches, and feel very empowered like I can afford to be picky. I should be picky! There is one guy that I connect with amazingly well but he lives far away. It could still work though, who knows?

I have to study today and don't want to!

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7 hours ago, duck said:

I am feeling very confused and tired. I slept all day Saturday.  My life is pure hell.  I do not understand my world.

im sorry duck. i dont remember if i asked you but can you get a pet ? maybe that will help? when i have days like that my dog help a lot. taking care of someone else (as hard as it is) makes me feel better.

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I am working. I just hate waking up on Sunday knowing that it's back to work. I wish I could just make enough money to not have to work so many hours. I used to work 7 days a week but, I found that it really kind of controlled my life and made me so depressed. I now make certain I take off Friday night and all of Saturday.

I just want Summer to come to an end. We had what I guess would be considered a break with low 80's but it will get hot again this week. 

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6 minutes ago, flasquish said:

Irritated but relieved. I didn't get married after I found out who my finacee really was. What a jerk. Glad I didn't fall for the crap.

hi flash,

I'm glad too. Glad you didn't, although I had no idea you were headed that way.

Big hugs and wishes for healing in your heart, my friend.

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Right now, I'm going to start working on an email to the other volunteer group I'm involved in. I will tell the chairperson and let her announce to the group. Because there was a group email asking for rsvp to the next meeting.

I don't know if I can save face, but I also think there's no defined place for me and I'm not good at taking the initiative.

I'm scared to do this, but it will save me some time down the road. Life is too short to be on a committee that you don't really want to be on, right?

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Just wondering why I do what I do.  Having a lady over for dinner tomorrow night who I know is not serious about me (because I have no money) and yet I am making her dinner in hopes of a little lovin.  

I am attracted to her, but, where's my pride?  Wish I hadn't agreed to this.

Brian

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Apparently rocking myself is weird to others? I've been doing it for who knows how long now. I just sit and rock back and forth. My brother pointed it out to me, but I thought it was just him being nit-picky. Then the other night, I started rocking myself again and my friend just looked to me and said "You're rocking yourself...?" Is it really that strange? I can't help it. ¯\_("3)_/¯

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