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Just Me And My Brain Fog

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Hey everyone,


I'm glad that I've been able to find this website, as it's given me hope to getting better. I guess I can start out by writing a bit about myself:

I'm a third year medical student in the united states in my late 20's, come from a family riddled with addiction, mental disorders (bipolar, depression, anxiety), but overall I've always been very resilient and I am proud of what I have achieved. The third year of medical school is both the best and hardest time in a medical students life--we're finally out of the lecture halls and in the hospital seeing patients, delivering babies, assisting in surgery, and helping people, but we're also working A LOT more than first in second year (at least for me). Third year is stressful, and I do have some family matters that are quite stressing, but overall, I've thoroughly enjoyed this year, despite the long hours and the bouts of "hurry up and wait-ing." 


However, in the month of october, I woke up one morning and literally could not process anything. My head felt like it was floating, short term memory was shot, couldn't retain what I was reading, and my ability to focus (especially while reading) was essentially eliminated--I felt as though I was mentally trudging through molasses. At the same time I began experiencing vivid dreams all night while sleeping, my appetite declined, I became incredibly fatigued all day. I would go to the hospital, drag through the day, and immediately come home to sleep for ~10hrs and wake up feeling completely unrested.


Given how important my mental cognition is for me to function as a student, the brain fog scared the out of me, and my anxiety went up--resulting in me experiencing derealization. I had experienced derealization briefly once before when I got myself all worked up and anxious during second year, but that lasted only for a day or so. I immediately sought medical help. Since then, my brain fog(and all the other associated symptoms) has lifted twice for about ~5d, once spontaneously, and once we my doctor and I finally decided to try medicating with klonopin. 


I'm now on lexapro, with about 4wks under my belt at 10mg, and im just now starting 20mg daily. Overall, I would say that I am functional. I'm still not "me," but I'm able to get by right now. I'm also taking adderall XR 20mg with 10mg IR at the end of the day to help me focus, and I still take the 0.5mg-1mg klonopin every now and again.


Here's where I'm a little confused, and so is my pDoc--aside from the first two weeks of lexapro, i've never really experienced any depressed mood. Just the other symptoms. I'm seeing a psychologist to help me with anxiety and the rumination and obsessing I'm doing about my brain fog; and both myself and my pDoc agree now is the time to see a psychiatrist instead of my family medicine doctor. 





I guess what I'm really hear:


1) im not alone in my "strange/atypical" presentation of depression/anxiety--I don't care if it's your story or someone you know, or a post you read, I just need some confirmation

2) Like everyone else, I'd love to hear stories of people who's cognition got better with treatment (I have visited the lexapro success stories thread and have read all of them)

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Welcome to DF, schn00gins.  :hugs:   We all react to depression and anxiety differently. And boy have many of us experienced the brain fog thing. Please make sure your doctor takes steps to eliminate other potential causes for your brain fog.  I'm glad you're on meds that seem to be working.

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