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The Post Anything Thread


Maximus0988

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I want to take psychology in uni but my dad told me not too. He says that there aren't any good jobs in the future for me if I do. Sigh.

Doesn't matter if there aren't any good jobs in the future. You want to learn about psychology, learn about it. That's what university is for!

Will he not help out financially if you take psychology?

Maybe take a class or two just to see what it's all about or talk to a psych professor to see what they think about the future of psychology, as an academic discipline and for job purposes.

:hugs: anita123

Aw thank u dolphin!!!! (((Hugs)))

Well my dad wouldn't be able to say no if I do ask for it but I don't think I'll really be happy learning if I know my dad doesnt agree on it.

I think my future is dead set on business because my dad thinks it's the only way to be more successful. But who knows when I'm older and I feel like getting another degree AND I don't have to ask for my dad's permission since I'll have enough money to enroll ;D

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I want to take psychology in uni but my dad told me not too. He says that there aren't any good jobs in the future for me if I do. Sigh.

Doesn't matter if there aren't any good jobs in the future. You want to learn about psychology, learn about it. That's what university is for!

Will he not help out financially if you take psychology?

Maybe take a class or two just to see what it's all about or talk to a psych professor to see what they think about the future of psychology, as an academic discipline and for job purposes.

It's true you can learn about psychology if you want. Definitely indulge yourself into what interests you. But I also agree with Anita's dad. Be careful to not put yourself into a difficult situation because it can be negative, if you get stuck in a hole come job application time. It's funny in a way how you mentionned psychology. Because for those who know what it's like to severely struggle, psycholgically you can become depressed, discouraged, and it can badly affect your personnal life as well, depending on how screwed, how jobless, or how badly in debt one is. So there's a psychology lesson for you. :smile: No but seriously, just be sure to make correct decisions.

I don't know how reliable external sources are, when they say there's plenty of jobs. I got screwed once.

Thanks Unwanted! Definitely helped me see in another perspective which I will remember when I apply for the courses in university! I never really thought about how it'd affect me when I'm stuck with finding jobs because I guess in my mind I wasn't realistic enough as all I thought about was how I could help other people. Ugh I feel like an ***** now because I can't see the bigger picture D: but I thank you again!!!! (((The_Unwanted))) :)

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Since this is the Post Anything Thread, I would like to say THANK YOU VERY MUCH to who ever created this forum! It has helped me to be able to post about issues, problems, etc. and get feedback. I have only been able to see my counselor once and she cancelled on me the other two times I was to see her, so this forum gives me a place to get things out and it helps sometimes just to be able to write it down in black and white to possibly see a solution and if you don't. then there are plenty of others here that are will and caring enough to offer advice. So, Thank you very much for being here! :icon12:  :hugs:

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I want to take psychology in uni but my dad told me not too. He says that there aren't any good jobs in the future for me if I do. Sigh.

Doesn't matter if there aren't any good jobs in the future. You want to learn about psychology, learn about it. That's what university is for!

Will he not help out financially if you take psychology?

Maybe take a class or two just to see what it's all about or talk to a psych professor to see what they think about the future of psychology, as an academic discipline and for job purposes.

:hugs: anita123

Aw thank u dolphin!!!! (((Hugs)))

Well my dad wouldn't be able to say no if I do ask for it but I don't think I'll really be happy learning if I know my dad doesnt agree on it.

I think my future is dead set on business because my dad thinks it's the only way to be more successful. But who knows when I'm older and I feel like getting another degree AND I don't have to ask for my dad's permission since I'll have enough money to enroll ;D

You can always major in business and minor in psych. There is some crossover between the two. My daughter plans to major in psych and minor in marketing. In the 7 courses to get a marketing minor, there are 3 courses that crossover. Just a thought.

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When there is a conflict between my "heart" and my "head," I try to give an edge to my heart.  I feel as though my "heart" is also part of my "head" and probably the highest part.  Its difficult to put into words.  My "mind" sees brutality in the world.  If I only had my mind, I would probably just "accept" brutality.  But my "heart" abhors brutality and "wishes" for an end to it.  I can't help thinking, at least at this time in my life, that whatever has given rise to my "head" also gave rise to the highest part of it:  my "heart."  Almost impossible for me to put this into words that are understandable. 

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I'm not sure how to explain this. Ever since the drugs, my sense of self/relationship with the world has not been at all stable. I've been working on a novel for years, but it's undergone so many changes that there are now essentially several different versions of it in my head (and some on paper, so to speak). I can't maintain the same tone or attitude throughout it. I just can't decide, and there are these jarring shifts between the versions. And the 2-3 internally consistent versions...I don't really care for, even though I know they're good as far as the writing goes. But I don't care enough to finish any of them - or rather, to finish the one story any of those ways; it's gone off track from what I wanted it to be. I don't know what I want it to be now.

 

I feel like writing a certain way, or about certain things, is reinforcing unhealthy patterns. I want to break away to write in a way that reinforces the healthful changes I'm working toward.

 

But I'm at a loss as to how to begin that - it's such a huge endeavor, really. But on the other hand, neither can I leave off writing in the meanwhile (or at least spinning out ideas in my head), since this creative outlet has been such a crutch pretty much my whole life. So, it's either find a way to reinforce the good and healthy, or else keep reinforcing the destructive...which ultimately keeps locking me in place, spinning my wheels, going through the same things over and over again. Honestly, this obstacle has kept me back from "breaking through" many, many times, going all the way back to when I was about 12-13. And I turn 31 this month.

 

What am I going to do about this??? I want to wrench myself out of the destructive and into the healthy, but it feels psychologically impossible, and I honestly just don't know how.

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Feeling like in a brain fog.  Had this overwhelmed feeling for a few days.  Anxious to see my Therapist Thursday.  

 

I feel there is only so much a person can endure, and I feel at that breaking point both physically and emotionally.   I can only speak freely about this with my physician, therapist, and you guys.  Knowing you understand.   Many friendships have become very distant because of my depression and my also pulling back. All because when I'm withdrawn or upset, friends are not much help even though they mean well.  But no one wants to be around a negative person, so I am concentrating on making new and fresh friendships who know me at the present. not knowing anything of my past.

 

Some friends have used my past ordeals as ammunition, ordeals I need to or have to forget to go forward.  When I say ammunition I mean taking advantage of my vulnerability, finances,  making me feel very self conscious.  For self preservation I have to let go of many friendships because I get tired of being hurt and always questioning myself by their remarks.  In their mind I guess they mean well, but in mine, I can't be around people that make me feel bad or can't trust.  Maybe that is selfish, but I feel protecting myself and whatever self esteem I have left is worth the sacrifice.

 

I guess I just don't trust people much now, because I have been taken advantage of so much.  Making new fresh friends I think is the key, while holding on to the five solid friendships I have now.  

 

It's all just so hard and tiresome. 

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I've felt like I needed a break for years. It's like I need things to just stop, so I can go outside of my life, and somehow catch my breath. I haven't been able, and actually every effort to take a break has ended in disaster, in things becoming nightmarish.

 

So then I've tried running to keep up, even though I'm out of breath and feel like I'm going crazy from the mounting pressure. It works when I can find a way to walk instead of run, when I hit a stride that allows me to deal with stuff relatively promptly, while still allowing myself time to relax and unwind - without actually stopping or trying to go away and let everything slide.

 

I really feel like I need to be engaged by someone outside of myself, to have not only that connection, but a kind of grounding... I don't know if I'm explaining it well, or even making any sense. But I feel so different and alienated from most people. All my life, I've desperately wanted to find someone like me. Inside. Someone with whom I could just emotionally relate. I empathize really easily, and painfully well, but weirdly, I don't identify easily with others at all. That's what I've always dreamed of. I know a big part of it is being in the wrong environment and the wrong circles, but I've always avoided the ones I'm drawn to because I don't feel good enough, even when they seem to think I'm one of them and get confused when I don't join in. But I'm terrified I'll ruin everything.

 

I don't want that to happen when I go to grad school. So I know that even after all this madness ends, when I've got my admits and I've accepted one of them, I'll still have a mountain of issues to work through in the wait, and in the journey there - and through. I hope there's a way I can get counseling there, because I'm afraid of being so intimidated by actually being there that I might just lose it and run. Or just spiral and be unable to function due to mental paralysis. I'm reading about the whole thing, and I'm worried I'll never be able to actually see myself as a scholar and act like one. And that I'll be ostracized or despised. I've encountered unbelievable cruelty, and it's hard not to expect it and keep flinching sometimes.

 

Sometimes, I'll even be writing about some warm family scene, and suddenly I'll start imagining horrible violence or verbal cruelty to the children. Vulnerability being despised, punished with the worst coldness, or exploited somehow. Trust laughingly betrayed. I don't know, it's like fears taking over my mind's eye. I've been working on stopping this for a long time, but it's hard. Of course, I don't write that, but it's like a part of me believes the warmth can't be real or something. I don't know if this makes sense, or if anyone else has these kinds of involuntary thoughts.

 

This is long, and not really what I planned on, so I'll stop now. I'm not sure why I'm thinking of these things. I've been feeling pretty OK today, other than the aggravation over getting the Rutgers application in.

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Feeling the urge to self harm tonight but trying to fight it.I know it sounds strange to say this,but I used to look foward to the nights I`d do it.It was for the moment of relief it would give.The relief or the release it would give me.The bad part is the ugly scars it leaves behind.I don`t like talking about them or explaining them.I feel ashamed of them.I`m ashamed of myself.I`m ashamed that I`ve had to hurt myself in the past for a temporary feeling of relief.

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I’m feeling pleased about weathering the weekend. Saturday night fistfuls of anxiety bubbled up prior to a Xmas engagement that entailed getting dressed up and going downtown solo (via hour+ multi-transfers on unfamiliar public transit) to a gourmet cooking school with two dozen company poohbahs, 99% of whom I’d never even met because I telecommute.

 

Instead of shutting down and not going, I ran a relaxing bath, threw on some red velvet, got there on time, and spent several hours preparing and eating delicious things with friendly and interesting people. I even stayed an extra hour, and when I left every connection to get home was smooth.

 

I was very happy to return to my comfy cocoon at midnight, but it felt good to get out and not have everything turn into lizards and pumpkins and panic.

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