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I Have No Hope Left


mrmorty

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This is my first post here, I just have no more hope left. My ex dumped me in May, and the whole process became extremely messy and dramatic because of me. I was unable to leave me alone, and now she wants nothing to do with me. I have had no contact with her for a couple of weeks now, mainly because I don't wanna leave her with an even worse impression of me. I loved her so much, I gave her everything I had. It wasn't enough, she will never talk to me again and find herself a healthy man. People tell me to try and move on, but every second is just pain and agony, and I have to fight my own compulsions to contact her or look at her twitter. I have never felt this depressed before, usually I am more anxious than depressed, but now light seems to have gone out in my heart. People tell me to find myself in this period, but I am so lost, I feel so different inside, like the hope for love and companionship has now died with the relationship. I am not strong, I was just a short phase in her life, while she meant so much to me. It feels so unfair and I just want it all to end, every year is a new big trauma. I will never become happier or feel safe, or comfortable. Thank you for reading this, I have nothing else left but to write.

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yes keep writing.

i hope you hear from others who are full of empathy and personal knowledge.

 

relationships matter.

failures are hard to figure out.

wisdom requires a lot of thought.

the end is the beginning of something else.

i hope you hear from others and that you can find your way.

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I know it sounds trite now but time really is a healer. We've all been through this and it does get better.

Take your time. Get through the pain, feel the loss. You have to go through that to move on.

It might not seem like it now but you WILL meet somebody else who is even more special further down the line. Remember, she finished with you - she doesn't deserve the be put on a pedestal. You are worth more.

I hope you get over this :)

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mrmorty, one way to help yourself is to take action.

I would like to suggest a couple of things: 1. Make a conscious effort to remember and exaggerate all the negatives about her

2. Then for every month you were together, take a week to try doing something you never did together but wanted to but your ex didn't.

3. Repeat as needed.

Example: man I thought was perfect for me, scorned my love and I had to do something or go up in flames.

1. I thought about all the times he was late--really, really late for a date with me, as if my time never mattered.

2. He never wanted to go dancing--he did have a clubfoot. But I danced like crazy.

3. He was a couch potato. I started doing lots of cardio activities.

I can't pretend that it was an instant success, but it really helped for me to be the one saying goodbye in my mind. I was the one who danced, exercised, was on time. He was the slug. And I was saying goodbye to him.

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Thanks, I am trying to do lots of new things and trying to push her off the pedestal, but it's like my own loneliness blocks me from getting on with my life and keeps me in my past. I hate the part of me that keeps thinking about how life is so unfair and all that. The world does not owe me anything, and I am not anymore unlucky than anyone else. It just feels that way, I guess.

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