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What's On Your Mind Right Now?


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19 hours ago, sober4life said:

Of course you should talk to her.  If your parents wishes are for you to have a miserable life then you should ignore your parents wishes.

 

I already have a miserable life which started fifty years ago.   If I do what my parents want I will go to heaven when I die.  I am 50 now so I only have about 30 years of misery left.  In heaven I will have eternal happiness. This is something I think about daily.:thumbsup:

Edited by duck
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I am currently thinking about my life at present and feeling very sad. Oh....well, I only have a few years left.  I may even die sooner who knows? As every second goes by my pain and misery are coming closer to the end. I am 50 years and 9 months old so I probably have another 30 years to go.

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Everything is a huge struggle. All of it, all of the time. I begin sweeping the floor and broom breaks. I run the garbage disposal and it blows a fuse for most of the kitchen. I try to fix one thing and it breaks another. Same at work. Always. And it goes on and on and on.

 

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15 hours ago, duck said:

 

I already have a miserable life which started fifty years ago.   If I do what my parents want I will go to heaven when I die.  I am 50 now so I only have about 30 years of misery left.  In heaven I will have eternal happiness. This is something I think about daily.:thumbsup:

I understand how you feel but your parents obviously had some type of relationship.  I don't know their story but it's absurd for them to be able to have something they don't want you to have.  Did your parents really say not to ever talk to girls in your life?  Why would they do that?

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I hate when I get the urge to talk to someone but feel like they would rather do anything else but have a conversation with me. I'm not worthy to these people. I'm such a lowly individual who seeks validation from people.

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On 9/7/2017 at 2:44 AM, SpiralingMind said:

I hope @evalynn and all the other DFers potentially affected by Hurricane Irma are safe!

Thanks @SpiralingMind. I'm safe and so are my loved ones. The worst that happened is we lost electricity at our house for four days. Luckily, I was able to stay at my sister's place for most of that time.

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4 minutes ago, Natasha1 said:

My husband is worried about me. Im going to extremes according to him. Its all overflowing. What else am i to do. 

Is there a reason for him to worry, Love?  Do you see the extremes he is talking about?

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1 hour ago, Debbers said:

Is there a reason for him to worry, Love?  Do you see the extremes he is talking about?

Yeah i think so. I guess im a little more "enthusiastic" about clearing out the house now. It sounds so tiny when i say it. But it has turned into a huge project that i cant  break away from. What i see that needs to be done stresses me out now. This is 25 years of build up and i just want to cry. I guess i can see it. I am reading this now and it sounds so silly but its very different as i live it.

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Seemingly little things can become huge and overwhelming for us. I'm working on a monthly report for my boss and I just can't finish it. It's absurd but that doesn't matter. I need to clean the apartment but can't conjure the energy for it. I'm thinking of taking several days of vacation just to do the cleaning. Seems like a real waste of vacation time but if it means I can get that place cleaned up...

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14 hours ago, Natasha1 said:

Im starting to wonder...there might be a point to my sudden interest in back country hiking. Maybe i am supposed to get mauled by a bear or eaten by a cougar if the brain cancer doesnt hit me first.

Sounds like a cool way to go.  :hugs::icon12:

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15 hours ago, Nisemono said:

Never lose hope they say. Weeell yes, hope is important. To hope for something that you'll never achieve can be torture though. You've seen those talent shows with Simon something, the British arsehole who likes to destroy peoples dreams because that's his only talent. But some of the people on these shows really are kidding themselves. You can't sing to save your life, and maybe you don't deserve to have Simon whatever, the British guy, slap you down so brutally but come on, you made my dog cower in a corner with your rendition of "I will always love you". So hope is good as long as you're not hoping for the impossible.

That's the difficulty. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference." True enough though I'm not religious. What things can I change? What things should I accept? I've lived most of my life as a loner, I've never been able to fit in properly with the human race. It's been crap. Do I accept being alone and maybe buy one of those life sized love dolls which sad pathetic men own. Frankly I hope I commit harakiri before that happens.

To hope for too much means being constantly tortured with disappointment. To never hope at all means that you miss any opportunities. Hope has to be set at an achievable level. I might like to have my arse voted the pertest in Europe but is that something realistic to hope for? I might like to have some close friends and fall in love but is that something realistic to hope for? It's easier sometimes to just abandon all hope. I'm not going to sing "I will always love you" in tune. Good friends and someone to love might sound normal, but I've never been normal.

I'm alone, and I can't imagine why anyone would want to spend time with me. Cauterise your hopes.

I am also alone all the time. It sucks. We are cursed brother. 

The word "Hope" should be banned. It is a nonsense word.

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I have been getting anxious lately I  keep imagining  when im driving a flash going off from a nuclear bomb burning everyone to death, I know how people in the cold war felt now, i looked up stuff about nuclear weapons,videos of tests, biography of Hiroshima victims when I was younger and it has scarred me, North Korea has icbm's  now and their last nuclear test was 18 times the size of the Hiroshima, the sanctions aren't working the rhetoric is becoming more violent. I don't see anyway they will give up there nuclear weapons, I told my therpist I was so worried about it.

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2 hours ago, scienceguy said:

I have been getting anxious lately I  keep imagining  when im driving a flash going off from a nuclear bomb burning everyone to death, I know how people in the cold war felt now, i looked up stuff about nuclear weapons,videos of tests, biography of Hiroshima victims when I was younger and it has scarred me, North Korea has icbm's  now and their last nuclear test was 18 times the size of the Hiroshima, the sanctions aren't working the rhetoric is becoming more violent. I don't see anyway they will give up there nuclear weapons, I told my therpist I was so worried about it.

Sometimes it's easier to focus on one fear like that, than it is to face all the countless fears and worries we have daily that we often feel we cannot do anything about.  I'm really bad about that. 

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