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Tungsten Aromatics

Severe Depressive Episode With Psychotic Symptoms

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I guess what it achieves in firstly just a simple assertion of dominance. You are setting the rules by which you can communicate. It probably won't be effective but it's still a statement. Second, if people don't want to converse genuinely then sometimes letting them just shout it all out is still a signal; it's a decision that you make and I guess in some ways it's like opening a can of shaken up soda -- at some point it fizzles out.

 

More importantly, you're not fighting them. You're setting boundaries, but not engaging from the standpoint of a a victim; by giving permission you are also taking some control. Apart form this, you are also acknowledging that they exist, and they aren't buggering off.

 

If they're having a tantrum then parent them. I guess what I'm saying is that maybe treating them as "just voices" is important to realise as far as centering yourself is concerned, but also the most assertive stance that you can take is possibly to acknowledge them and treat them as you would anybody else. By doing that you assert yourself and your principles (which I know to be good and true) as the core that guides what is undoubtedly an unpleasant situation.

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They are hell bent on destroying me. "Right" voices want me to "spend" money, proving my a fraud as I "show" outside the door and "left" voices are just now following.

 

I have been referred to day hospital and am just pending my time today in wait for my review tomorrow. Hopefully they will disappear completely now.

 

I lost a little of my rag yesterday with controlled anger and let it out by talking talking to people and emailing my support network so that was positive.

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Have you had your review at the day hospital yet (I'm assuming that's the same thing that we have here, used in cases of crisis)?   How are the voices being today?

 

:hugs::hugs::hugs:

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Wow, Tungsten.
To have voices bothering you like that, and still functioning as well as it seems you do, it's impressive to me how well you are holding up and handling this, not least how positive you seem.

It must be pretty difficult to have voices chattering and nagging all day long, makes my complaints about the girlfriend seem pretty silly, considering at least that's just one voice to adhere to :)

 

Hope they're able to work out a good medication combo for you.

And that things settle a bit.

 

I hope things go well at the hospital, warm feelings your way.

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Hi ChrystalR -- Thanks :)

 

I have been in waiting for the meds to kick in and today is the first day where I'm not having any hallucinations or voices so something is working which I'm glad by.

 

I don't want to unpick things at the moment as I'm just enjoying being in the moment without the sense that I'm being "watched" by voices.

 

The day hospital is going ok but I feel I'm not getting what I need (rather then want) from it due to them being short staffed so that can't be helped, though it would be nice to find more coping methods rather then distractions which is what they seem to be doing. I'm picking study back up now which is good too.

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So no review yesterday ( my mistake) as that's on the 8th (next Monday) but the day hosptial aren't short staffed now and I had a good conversation about symptom management and mindfullness. The only thing is now I'm not able to commit full this week as I've commitments with the Open University. Even so, I was made to do art as a "distraction" in the morning. Trying to politely say "Actually art isn't my thing" meaning: I'm not here for distractions, and I was still forced or coaxed to do something I hadn't signed up to? Geez give me a break.

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I'm getting increasing paranoid about my dad.

 

Everything I go round to his I get asked "So what's going on in your head."

 

He's never ask me this before now other then the last two occasions that I've been there and it makes me feeling like he's reporting my movements to this GP in Grove.

 

Last night, he pointed to that road and said don't you want to go down there?

 

I've been purposefully avoiding that road for obvious reasons.

 

Strange. :(

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I'm getting increasing paranoid about my dad.

 

Everything I go round to his I get asked "So what's going on in your head."

 

He's never ask me this before now other then the last two occasions that I've been there and it makes me feeling like he's reporting my movements to this GP in Grove.

 

Last night, he pointed to that road and said don't you want to go down there?

 

I've been purposefully avoiding that road for obvious reasons.

 

Strange. :(

I'm sorry.  Do you think he might be trying to understand what you're dealing with?  I wonder why he would be reporting your movements? Is he trying to be helpful, in a clumsy way?  It's tough enough to fight this, without having to struggle against family's misconceptions and clumsy attempts at helping.  :hugs:  Keep fighting, T.

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Hi Tungsten, 

 

Do you think your dad is maybe just taking more of an interest in your well fair and therefore asking after what you are thinking? Thats the way I read what you said. I have had that happen before. Where a relative has shown no interest and then all of a sudden wanted to know more. 

 

From what you said before Im assuming the voices/paranoia have an issue with one of the roads.  Assuming too that that is the road your dad referred to. Was it the logical way to go and does your dad know about the difficulties you have with that road. When you said you feel increasingly paranoid about him then I am taking it that part of you knows he is fine and as he has always been but the voices or paranoia are trying to tell you something different. Is that right? 

 

Its fab the meds are kicking in and the hallucinations easing off. I hope things continue to get better consistently. 

Edited by Fizzle

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I have got advice from my support network with regards to my dad and it seems as he's never been subject to (so quite closeted) to mental health issues, he finds it hard to process and connect with people suffering illness. He tries but says things that may well be seen as intensive to the issue itself. I have had my second review and have a review with the pharmacist from EIS to see if Olazapine is the correct med for me. If it is, then I will be switched to it replacing Aripiprazole and I will push for it to replace Mirtazapine too.  

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, I have family very lacking in understanding  of mental health too. Some who do have issues hut have no awareness or empathy. It can be very hurtful and especially from a parent. 

 

It sounds like he is a little like a bull in a china shop. Half intent of getting across the room from one side to the other but breaking things in his path. 

 

Good luck  with the review Tungsten

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So I've had my pharmacist review.

 

I get the sense I'm being lead on by my mental health team about switching antipsychotics. I understand the risks and have put forward a decent case but the end result is the same as before, no.

 

I just can't understand why they are so reluctant to let me at least try Olanazapine?

 

I have however been successful in switching from Mirtazapine to Sertraline, so I will wait a few months until I am stable and push again.

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I thought I'd give an update.

 

After the pharma review I have been taken off Mirtazapine and switched to Sertraline. My only issue now though, is that I've just recovered from a severe blip and yet, I'm hearing voices again.

 

I've sent a few emails so I'll wait for the reply.

 

Hopefully I can switch to Olanazapine sooner and/or up Sertraline.

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Hi Tungsten.

How frustrating for you. Is it right back where it was or milder? I hope they sort things out quickly. I find med changes pretty scary but it must be that much worse when the possible consequences are another episode like that. 

 

Take care. 

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Hey Tungsten,

 

I'm sorry to hear that you've just had another episode and that the voices are back. I can't imagine how hard that is. I hope that you're able to go through the med changes with little side effects.

 

(((Hugs)))

 

Keep us posted.

Edited by freckledface

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Hey Tungsten,

 

There's a new member that just posted regarding this diagnosis and I thought maybe you could offer some words of encouragement for her. Her name is Samanthabrooks (something). She just posted today.

 

(sorry don't mean to hijack your thread with this) :D Thanks for your help!

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Tungsten,

I hope they'll let you try the olanzapine, I can't believe they won't at least tell you why or why not.  Sounds like you've made the final switch to sertraline, I hope it evens out for you soon.  All this switching meds must be pretty stressful mentally and emotionally.  Give yourself time to adjust.  :flowers:  Thank you for keeping us updated, T. 

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One thing that annoys me about my voices is that, they get a free board.

 

I'm the one who pays rent, I'm the one who buys food and I'm the one who owns their ass by the pure fact that I AM physical. I have a physical body and they don't. SO why the hell do they "claim" things as if it is theirs?

 

They just come and go and leave me with the ****** after effects.

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