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Ixeua

The "how Do You Feel Right Now?" Thread

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I'm feeling sad and pretty lost. I have no motivation to do something I thought I loved. And now I don't know what to love that I can turn into a career. Family's the only thing I really feel I need in my life. Maybe I'm meant to just be a stay at home mom. But I feel like I have the potential to do more. I just no longer know what that more is.

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Thinking of my old self make me more depressed..i so ****ing hyper active,happy and full of joy...i missed the feeling of being normal..those who are married and have a job somehow lucky as they have to look after their family and take care of their jobs..that keeps them busy and let them think about depression less.

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Thinking of my old self make me more depressed..i so ******* hyper active,happy and full of joy...i missed the feeling of being normal..those who are married and have a job somehow lucky as they have to look after their family and take care of their jobs..that keeps them busy and let them think about depression less.

I know the feeling desperados. I miss my old self too, very much so that it hurts. I used to be so full of life, enthusiastic and positive... although just because someone has a family, is married or has a job doesn't mean their life is great ... the grass is always greener, remember that. Families come with strife and problems, as do jobs... as you know. And sometimes bigger problems than if you didn't have them. My job totally sucks. But you're right, it does keep me more busy. It does help to keep busy, that's one thing I've learned about depression... the less time you have to dwell on the negative & on your thoughts, and the more you are forced to work on your life, the better. So I'm not sure what I'm saying really... I think I'm agreeing with you. :) (((hugs)))

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According to the tests I'm almost back to where I started - in the ****.

 

The psychologist recommends the doctor to have me hospitalised. We'll see in a weeks time what they'll decide. I don't mind. I want to rest. New experiences are always welcome. It stimulates the mind.

I feel atrociously tired of everything. Didn't go to work and probably will stay at home til next monday.
 

 

Edited by APFSDS

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doing hw. feeling even more lost about my life than before.

 

also too lazy to go pick up my meds (bcp and antiseizure) so I've been skipping doses. I'm not a very smart person.

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doing hw. feeling even more lost about my life than before.

 

also too lazy to go pick up my meds (bcp and antiseizure) so I've been skipping doses. I'm not a very smart person.

Don't skip your seizure meds, I know what that can do. It's hard to do those little tasks like picking up meds when not feeling well (or angry at yourself or depressed), but do it anyway because if nothing else,  I care. 

Myself, I'm feeling like I got a lot accomplished for me in the past day. It felt good after two days of migraine so nothing done. But I still wish my stamina was like most other people. . .

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Thinking of my old self make me more depressed..i so ******* hyper active,happy and full of joy...i missed the feeling of being normal..those who are married and have a job somehow lucky as they have to look after their family and take care of their jobs..that keeps them busy and let them think about depression less.

I know the feeling desperados. I miss my old self too, very much so that it hurts. I used to be so full of life, enthusiastic and positive... although just because someone has a family, is married or has a job doesn't mean their life is great ... the grass is always greener, remember that. Families come with strife and problems, as do jobs... as you know. And sometimes bigger problems than if you didn't have them. My job totally sucks. But you're right, it does keep me more busy. It does help to keep busy, that's one thing I've learned about depression... the less time you have to dwell on the negative & on your thoughts, and the more you are forced to work on your life, the better. So I'm not sure what I'm saying really... I think I'm agreeing with you. :) (((hugs)))

 

Oh thx havehope i guess we all miss our old selves.Looking at your reflection in the mirror you see noting wrong about yourself..you are physically the same human being in the mirror..there seem to be noting wrong,you have everything in your life and there's no need to be unhappy but inside you there's something tremendously going wrong as spiritually you are not the same person as you used to be in the past...depression makes you a constantly suffering person,it forces you to think about suicide and destroys all humanity left in your spirit.We are different but not in a good way...depression play games with you and make fun of you..yesterday i was feeling suicidal today i think life is good...bored of this up and downs and emotional swings.

Edited by desperados

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Thinking of my old self make me more depressed..i so ******* hyper active,happy and full of joy...i missed the feeling of being normal..those who are married and have a job somehow lucky as they have to look after their family and take care of their jobs..that keeps them busy and let them think about depression less.

I know the feeling desperados. I miss my old self too, very much so that it hurts. I used to be so full of life, enthusiastic and positive... although just because someone has a family, is married or has a job doesn't mean their life is great ... the grass is always greener, remember that. Families come with strife and problems, as do jobs... as you know. And sometimes bigger problems than if you didn't have them. My job totally sucks. But you're right, it does keep me more busy. It does help to keep busy, that's one thing I've learned about depression... the less time you have to dwell on the negative & on your thoughts, and the more you are forced to work on your life, the better. So I'm not sure what I'm saying really... I think I'm agreeing with you. :) (((hugs)))

 

Oh thx havehope i guess we all miss our old selves.Looking at your reflection in the mirror you see noting wrong about yourself..you are physically the same human being in the mirror..there seem to be noting wrong,you have everything in your life and there's no need to be unhappy but inside you there's something tremendously going wrong as spiritually you are not the same person as you used to be in the past...depression makes you a constantly suffering person,it forces you to think about suicide and destroys all humanity left in your spirit.We are different but not in a good way...depression play games with you and make fun of you..yesterday i was feeling suicidal today i think life is good...bored of this up and downs and emotional swings.

 

Yeah... I know what you mean. i go through major up and down emotional swings like crazy & on a daily basis. Yo-yo effect. Depression does play mind games.... it fools the mind into thinking only negatively and seeing only negatively. It takes a conscious effort and shift in focus to a more positive light... constantly battling the negative mind.

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Major stress, major stress, major stress. Friend still in ICU, another friend of over thirty years, her major support friend died unexpectedly this morning. My friend herself has major health problems from brain hemorrhage last year (almost died also), I'm having third ultrasound tomorrow to see if growth I have has shrunk at all (probably not, last two they were the same, but at least not growing), but doc does not want to do surgery until my A1C level (diabetic) is lower than last 7.9 level because of risk of infection --- I'm sure it isn't lower, all supplemental diabetic meds tried since made me throw up, and daily levels still high; hubby just found he was diabetic also, this morning was told his level is 10.3 (yikes) and they don't want to put him on meds because he has severe crohn's disease (he's already had pieces of intestines removed). I think family doc making mistake about not putting hubby on meds, his chance of complications like eye, heart or kidney problems are about 80-100% at that level, and he can't follow diet because of crohn's (diets are almost opposite each other). I want to go on a vacation but we have no money and our medical bills are eating us alive. I try to be strong, today I'm just not.

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Hey everyone's it's been a while since I posted here. Sending hugs to everyone. I've been doing better, but at the same time I'm still struggling. Next month I turn 21 and that's all I look forward to really as of recently. I've been going out more often but I can't exactly say if it's helping or not. I have crying spells throughout the week and it seems so normal to me now...

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I'm so sorry that so many here are struggling with so many things - I don't know what to say except I'm sending best wishes for things to look up soon for everyone; *hugs* to you all -

Edited by mulberrypie

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Hugs to all :O we better don't forget to take our anti-happiness pills to be more unhappy...pill companies want us to take them for the rest of our lives so they can make fortune out of us...maybe to sell more and more they modify the med to give that unhappiness feeling so we could buy more of them forever.

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Hugs to all :O we better don't forget to take our anti-happiness pills to be more unhappy...pill companies want us to take them for the rest of our lives so they can make fortune out of us...maybe to sell more and more they modify the med to give that unhappiness feeling so we could buy more of them forever.

I call them falsehope pills... false hope is the only benefit they gave me...

But they can make happy some of us..perhaps. Oh no happy... better said 'depression free' ...'cause happiness can't be a product of the pill. It would be so easy...

Edited by Mikayla

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