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About MusicLover2

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  1. That's irrelevant, I didn't state drugs don't help at all but you're putting so much at stake by taking them and you all know this so why deny this fact? Believe it or not Depression is a huge mystery still after so many years so nobody knows what these drugs are 'really' doing to your body. I'm saying that if other people who you can meet in person or take advice from online, famous people, books etc. can give you two sides of the story - why not try some of their ideas and put into action instead of waiting for a pill to turn this around for you?
  2. Awesome. One question, why is everyone extremely concerned with the drugs than fighting out of it in a natural manner? It doesn't make sense as you know drugs are going to harm you and you still have to be patient. With the natural route, you lift it in a healthy manner and still have to be patient. Main point being it takes patience and perserverance to get out of it, doing one small thing a day can make a difference.
  3. .... what if you're scared to make that decision?scared if you would be able to handle whats coming next or not? That's very normal to feel terrified, I definitley was. But it is your choice whether you want to keep suffering or try to help yourself each day, even a little step can make a huge difference with patience and perserverance.
  4. Families are weird about things like this especially because they really don't understand what you are going and they are putting it under the rug perhaps? My family didn't really take me seriously either, it was frustrating but it's really good you're getting support elsewhere.
  5. Try reading or distracting yourself by going for a walk observing everything that is occuring around you. It's a tough one to get out of
  6. Feel a similar way, everyone seems sort of faulty and everything is so pushed onto us in society which has very low standards now. I sometimes feel motivated by it but sometimes very frustrated
  7. Agreed with you. I had a month of derealisation and it wasn't that bad as I didn't really give into it too much, it was scary but not permanent. Goes away with time, or atleast it did for me. I had to ride it out and just try to not 'think' too much about it and it happened after a very stressful event.
  8. Sounds like that's the big part of depression, I wouldn't compare yourself to work harder or you're going to make yourself feel worse. It's the usual guilt trip - where everything seems to be your fault that is the illusion of depression. It's normal to feel guilty so you work harder yet make yourself feel worse in the long run so I advise you to not compare yourself to others as of now. You do have a lot of strength as you are dealing with depression which depletes your energy so I wouldn't think you're a weak person or anything. If you truly want to get out of depression you have to make that decision on your own to fight it no matter how tough it gets - nobody can make that decision for you. If you don't do anything to help yourself, you're most likely going to keep feeling bad. If you aren't doing anything to help yourself out of depression, ask yourself why and analyse and see what you find. It's these questions that help you get to the root of your problem so you can eventually take action and fix them. If you need any tips or help for that bit, PM me and I'll be happy to help. This is coming from a person who overcame depression on their own w/o meds or any help thus far, still an everyday battle though.
  9. When I was at home I was quite overweight so felt physically sick aswell as feeling depressed was an awful feeling. Cutting the weight down for me personally is a must, it affects every area of my life but my happiness isn't depedent on it. I'm not really fussed with the way I look, I'm happy with my image. To me it's more of how I feel in general, weight loss helps every other aspect such as productivity which ultimately boosts my happiness triple-fold.
  10. Oh sorry I forgot to mention nearly everyone turned their back on me while I was at my lowest point. My mental health assistant was adamant I was okay and left me, my family were talking about me behind my back and told me to figure it out on my own...so no I didn't exactly have this emotional support at all. The only reason why I mentioned not taking antidepressants is because I knew what they could potentially do to my brain in the long term and I just couldn't take it anymore. It's not logical to take a drug that's going to make you feel worse, that's the worst decision I could've made. The decision came mainly from just being knocked down so hard, that was probably the hardest bit. Acceptance plays a big role. I understand you're seeing everything in a rocky view right now but if you want some advice, stop being so hard headed and take advice from others...dependent on how much you want to get out of this mess. Best of luck!
  11. Oh believe me I was ready to go... I was at the edge of my seat with the anhedonia and it was ******* me slowly. I felt utterly hopeless and in despair. I hit rock bottom. I saw no other way other than making a decision to get better and fighting for what I can even if it was hopeless, however that bit of a fight helped me so please don't talk down to me like I don't know what you're going through because believe me I do. Running to drugs was never an option to me and I sure wasn't going down that route so DECIDED to fight on my own and that's exactly what I did. And I won, so yeah it worked for me. If it doesn't work for you, find something else. I never came here to tell anything as nobody even bothers to listen, you won't get anywhere if you don't take advice then take action no matter how stubborn depression can cause you to be. I came here because someone mentioned something that I could relate to. The goals stuff is the sidelines, it's breaking down those negative patterns and analysing why you're upset which was the key to overcoming depression for me. Basically get to the roots of it and being completely honest and acceptance of the whole process. The goals just give you direction when you're lost. If you don't want to do it, that's up to you. I would've been in the same state if I didn't but I WANTED to get better really badly so made changes, no point complaining if you're not doing anything about it. Oh and add patience and perseverence
  12. Holy Lord, you just gave me an insight! I remembered when I was in an anhedonic state and was in deep depression, I wrote down goals and things I'd do if I wasn't depressed. I focused so much on those goals in my head instead of the negative thoughts, it still felt hopeless at that time but I think by focusing on it a lot, I eventually broke the negative patterns. So basically, like you said - allowing your brain to get out of self-defense mode and know everything is safe.
  13. My apathy state lifted when I found the root of my depression, my feelings came back and my personality was recovered.
  14. If you're not happy about your job at the moment and it's making you feel like this, have you considered quitting and looking for something a lot more rewarding and to your style? If you had the choice to be in a uncomfortable situation each day but making more than you would be in a job you're completely comfortable that allows you to build self-esteem & confidence, what would you choose? This may be stupid of me to say as I don't know your situation but working for the wrong people for a prolonged period of time is really a waste of time. Getting by is easy but it comes along with the price of misery and uncomfort feelings you're dealing with now, there's always another option. If it's not okay to quit straight away, try to atleast look for another job that you may see yourself being comfortable with. Edit: Also please don't put yourself down by comparing yourself to others - it will drive you nuts! You're obviously NOT lazy, you've got good work ethic but you come off as just REALLY uncomfortable in the place you're at, that seems like it's the issue. I'd forget about the comparison to society, because if you look at it this way - they mainly just want money and status. If you want to go for something a little more, you need to make a change in what's causing the issue. Easier said than done but not impossible infact might be the best decision of your life... Best of luck
  15. Sounds like you need to set a difficult challenging goal that will stretch yourself in a way you can't imagine. The stuff you accomplished are incredible, you should really be proud of yourself! But saying that you're practically bored of it - new challenges need to be placed and overcome. Try to find something extremely creative or anything you can be in a 'flow' state of mind.
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