rhyl

Forgotten. Invisible.

Angry.

This is unfortunate. Is there a way to hide your profile? I want to leave but I don't want my stuff searchable.

Wow.

Worthless people???

Hi and welcome. I was on Abilify and, although I didn't experience anxiety, I did have some troublesome side effects that my doctor insisted could not possibly be the Abilify. I stopped it and they did, too. Contact your doctor and talk to her about alternatives or lowering the dose.

I generally agree, but Abilify was the ONLY drug that ever helped me. I had to stop taking it because of the side effects. They were not debilitating, just annoying.

Scared. Angry. And like I want to die.

I totally agree. That was very offensive. You are probably not around anymore, but I just wanted to say that I am so very sorry you are suffering. I am in a similar boat financially (and I'm 57) and I know how desperately hopeless that feels, even when you are doing everything you can to make ends meet. DItto here.

I have a huge problem with anger. It's been esp. hard for me lately, where I feel completely out of control of my reactions to things. Are you in therapy? And have you been dx with anything other than depression? When something triggers an angry reaction in us, it is often tied to something else. I have complex PTSD and recognizing and working on *why* things make me angry has helped lessen it somewhat. If you're dealing with other stressors, like pain, these also may compound the problem.

That feeling that there is another part of us who feels and thinks differently than we do and that "destroys" our relationships, is common with depression. I think it might help to tell your doctor exactly what you said here, to help him/her help you.

I'm preparing a series of workshops on journaling, so this is a subject of interest to me. There are all different kinds of journals you can keep. If you have trouble writing, you might start drawing. You don't have to know how to draw and you can be a lousy artist, none of that matters. But sometimes what we choose and the colors we use to express ourselves can say a lot. If you really want to just write, don't worry about how it sounds or how it's written or whether it is connected and makes any sense. Sometimes, I just start writing down words. Sometimes I write in a column or just randomly all over the page. It always helps me see patterns, like what I'm thinking about the most. And sometimes I share all that with my therapist. He doesn't care how it's written because anything I write helps him understand me better.

Have you looked into Virtual Vocations? It's a pretty good site that posts jobs from all sorts of companies. There is a monthly fee to get all info on most jobs, but if you're serious about finding an at-home job, it's definitely a good place to start.

Hi Oussama, Welcome to DF and just know that there are many people here who will offer support and NOT judge you. I am so sorry you are struggling and suffering.

Could have written this myself. I always feel invisible these days and seldom get the replies I need in forums. It's why I don't frequent them or post much anymore.