rhyl

Only thing I'm on is Mirapex for the restless leg. I've considered CBD oil; I'm pretty sure my doctor would have a problem with that, though. My experience with being out is the opposite. The more I do outside the home (or, for that matter, inside), the more pain I'm in.

I am in a LOT of pain most of the time. It's been attributed to my weight, my depression, and the PTSD. I started having issues with restless leg a month or so ago, and my doctor put me on medicine for it; he also said at that point that I might have fibromyalgia. I have no doubt about the fibro. What I don't understand is that my doctor wants me to exercise and to just "push through the pain." I am reading differently for people with fibro - in fact, I'm reading that only certain, no impact exercises should be attempted and when the pain gets bad, rest is important. The pain definitely makes the depression worse. And makes it hard to sleep. I can get absolutely no relief. Anybody else?

Hey, I think that is awesome! Cats are my favorite company.

So how *do* you respond to feeling bad, duck? Some people just sit, watch TV, sleep. I have long periods where I can't do anything.

Sitting outside in nature. Reading books online. Mindful breathing. Taking a shower/bath. Taking a walk. Just a few. I would say there are more that are "free" than not.

I thought it might be helpful to take a look at ways people are taking care of themselves through all of the depression and anxiety and PTSD symptoms. Taking care of ourselves is hard. Even if I don't believe anything will help, *doing* something at the very least pulls me out of my suffering just a little. Temporarily, yes. But then...everything in this life is temporary. So what do I do? I have a couple of lists, one of which I carry with me. When things are super bad and I am bordering on non-functioning, I pull out the list and: 1. Play with, hug, talk to my cats. 2. Color (really, it's very therapeutic). 3. Listen to music. 4. Breathe. Sometimes the mere act of taking a mindful breath helps. I have a few apps on my phone that I use, a meditation done by my therapist, and several books I sometimes reference. 5. Write. Sometimes I can't put a string of words together, so I make lists or just starting putting words on the paper. It's amazing what often comes of that. 6. Go see a movie. 7. Take a shower (I do this a lot. So glad I don't have to pay the water bill.) 8. Clean out drawers or a closet. So...those are some of my things. What are yours?

Are you on any medication? I had a problem with thinning hair and I lost a lot and it ended up being my medication. My doctor at the time denied it could be the medicine, but there were thousands of anecdotes on line of people with the same issue and once I stopped the meds, I stopped losing my hair.

Ok, so I've been to a LOT of therapists. There are many different kinds and a great variety of personalities, so sometimes the first one is not a fit. That said, I had a similar reaction to my first therapist, who just kept asking me over and over again why I was there and why I thought I was depressed. He actually did ask me other things and suggest other things, but all I heard was that he was clueless and wouldn't be able to help. I was with him for 4 years. It was *really* hard, but I learned so much from him. You didn't say how many times you'd been to see yours - sometimes we have to give them a chance and develop some rapport with them. I certainly have left after just one session, but that was usually because they did something cruel or just inexcusable.

I wanna die.

What do you think it would take for you to make some changes, to help you move forward?

I don't know about your other posts, but God-talk is hard for a lot of people. I think there is still a religious forum - you might get more response there.

Something else you might try if you can is massage. I've had 2 episodes of chest pain (but these were not my first) and I started seeing a massage therapist, who said the muscles in my upper to mid-back were extremely tight and bunched up. I also have very, very tight neck muscles, which are creating arm and chest pain.

I took this for a long while and could not function at all on it.

I do understand where you are coming from but in my experience, lying about what's wrong can only create more problems. Also, I believe it only adds to the stigma. I have dissociative identity disorder and used to end up in places and not know how I got there or come to in the middle of conversations with people I didn't recognize. I made lots of excuses then and, while it helped in the moment, it's made being accepted for who I am very hard and it created a lot of mistrust from friends.

I suspect you will need to rule out the medical before you rule out the psychological. Any psychological issue can cause physical symptoms, many like those you describe. I have them all - plus some - and my primary dx is complex PTSD. I also have depression and anxiety (both associated with the PTSD) and a dissociative disorder. All the best! rhyl