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Everything posted by Onelightburning

  1. japanese samurai ninjas, eating noodles and
  2. Do you go to therapy frozen? I've been in therapy for a while now and while it's somewhat like endless daily panic attacks right now, I try to hang on and hope that in the long run it pays off. For me the pain, the anxiety are a sign that something is moving inside me. I feel like it's going to be better once I go through all this. I will be stronger and I will be more myself when I go through this. Thinking of it as a growth process helps for me.
  3. You're not weak. You're you. I really wish there was a fix or a "solution" to the "problem" like a mathematical equation or something. The reality is that the anxiety and depression are feelings, they are a part of you just like other emotions. Emotions can be worked on and understood better but not solved like some theoretical entity. If it helps anything atleast there is someone here that understands exactly how you're feeling and can accept that, because you don't need to be anything else that you already are.
  4. Hey, I think it's important you are aware of that feeling. The better you accept the jealous feelings the easier it is for you. As for the hurt and wounds she has caused you, you can't just accept that and let go like that. It's harder. Have you tried talking to someone you trust about how deeply she hurt you? That could help you in the long run.
  5. Hey there, I think you describe your emotions so well. I know it's painful, but you already have discovered something important about yourself. I think you're working on the core issues and it takes time to understand them well enough to make it through them bit by bit. It sure doesn't feel comfortable, but remember that your therapist is on your side, even when you start questioning that(and that is natural). These are emotions that you've dealt with on your own perhaps always, so it's only natural that it feels strange, different and new. You don't need to force yourself, only do what feels right for you.
  6. Talking about your dreams can be useful too
  7. Hey lp! Makes complete sense to me. It sounds like you truly were facing/reliving something from your past in that session. Why did it feel like that in the body? Perhaps the emotions came from so deep and were so strong that it was the only way to feel them. I think that it was really important session, although extremely painful and made you feel scared very understandably.
  8. Sounds awesome, SF! It sounds like good things are coming your way. Good luck with the Friday's session and enjoy the weekend!
  9. Hey Fizzle, I feel the same often times. I like to watch some disturbing movies some times, like "Shutter Island". It helped me too with those overwhelming feelings. I think we're all dealing with something similar, and reading all of your posts it also helps me to cope, although it's still mostly surviving and not really living..
  10. Hey crewneck! Others have given so much good advice. Therapy certainly does help with these kind of things. I think that after those overloading, traumatizing situations it's inevitable that you should feel alarmed and keep your guard up. There is nothing wrong with that and it's actually a natural reaction. I do understand however that it's disturbing when it interferes with your everyday life and relationships. Do you think it could be a good idea to talk to a professional helper about this? You need and deserve to get some help, support and understanding after all you've been through.
  11. Certainly if it came to your mind, it came there for a reason. It sounds important, although it must feel very confusing experiencing it. I might be wrong about this, but it sounds like your mind is processing something very important now. Have you shared this experience with your therapist?
  12. Hey Bubblehead, Yes, it can! Can I ask, do you go to therapy at the moment or have you considered that as an option? It sounds like you're going through extreme stress, having had those extremely painful experiences from early on in life, and having to deal with it all by yourself. My experience is that understanding those emotions with a therapist is the key. It's like sharing the burden that you've always had on your shoulders, that only just gets heavier through the years. Then when you share and understand it, it doesn't feel like that anymore. In fact the burden really gets lighter and it's then possible to reconnect with those emotions, in a safe and supportive environment.
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