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bh34465

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Blog Comments posted by bh34465

  1. SpaceAce,

    I can relate to much of what you are saying. I have always been a quiet person. I could stand up in front of people and speak, but put me in a group of more than four people, and I kind of get lost. I, too, feel as if I have nothing to contribute. It takes me a long time to get to a comfort level where I can open up to someone. Also, I get a lot of comments about being quiet, and "it's your turn to say something." It seems as if people who are loud and boisterous are considered more "normal" than someone who is quiet and listens. For the past few months, I have had trouble even speaking to a store clerk or a stranger in the park. My life has been in turmoil for months and has nothing interesting in it lately to talk about. So, I understand where you are coming from.

  2. @brybry -- thanks for commenting. At the time I was walking, I kept fighting off depressive, anxious thoughts/feelings, but I kept it up. I think it it gives me time to think, but sometimes the thoughts that come aren't good ones; I just try to go on in spite of.

    @phalseuphoria -- I've read some of the studies. I don't know if just walking is enough; some say aerobic exercise is what gets the endorphins going. It probably still helps to get outdoors. I guess I can praise myself for having the motivation to do it.

  3. This maybe wasn't the best article to post. I read several different ones that I found by searching for "positive affirmations make worse." I was looking at another forum and someone had mentioned that positive affirmations were found to do more harm than good in someone with low self esteem. That made me curious, so I did some reading on it.

    For me personally, it helps to tell myself, "You've gotten through things like this before, and you can do it again," or "Things will get better." I think even when I am depressed, there is something deep seated in me that believes those statements, even though I struggle with depressive thoughts. I can see how repeating things that you don't really believe or believe fully about yourself could be harmful. If you are repeating a statement, but no changes are happening that can make you feel worse. Also, I read that if you repeat a statement you don't really believe about yourself, you tend to end in your mind with a "but." So, you may end up repeating negative statements about yourself more than normal because of the "buts." For example: "I am a good person." Then your mind says, "But I'm not a good person just because I say it." If you repeat that statement 30 times in a day with the "but" statement in your mind, you've also just repeated a negative statement 30 times. (I am paraphrasing what I read on one site.)

    In your case, you are repeating things that you like about yourself, so you already have that belief about yourself, and repeating statements about that reinforces it. I respond well to others' positivity about me as well. I think because I feel judged by others and inferior, so when someone believes in me, I tend to respond positively toward it. That is the thing about being isolated. I don't get the feedback from others, just my own (often negative) feedback.

  4. I borrowed the last four paragraphs from psychcentral.com, so it is okay if you save it for review. I wouldn't give up on getting better, and taking a day at a time is a good way to take it. I haven't had gray thinking much myself. It is the hardest thing not to think negatively when dealing with depression or anxiety. It is difficult to keep putting one foot in front of the other (or taking baby steps) when you can't immediately see results. That is something I grapple with.

    bh

  5. Yesican:

    I'm glad you were able to get to see your pdoc sooner than expected. That will take a huge weight off of you. I hope that the new pdoc is someone who is helpful for you. Even if not, at least you are reaching out for help. You should feel neither ashamed nor embarrassed that you haven't "kicked" your depression. I don't know how long you have been fighting it, but it takes time. It sounds like you are actively looking for solutions, so don't beat yourself up because you are still depressed. It can be a vicious cycle of being depressed and anxious, then feeling depressed and anxious about the fact that you feel like your life is stalled. Hang in there, and I hope your visit with the pdoc goes well.

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