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About Disco197826

  • Birthday 06/15/1982

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  • Gender
  • Location
    Tennessee, USA
  • Interests
    Food, Video Games, Anime, Boobs, Cats, Cold Weather, Writing, Humor.

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  1. I'm dumb dumb at interpersonal relationshippery, but being as I used to have an acquaintance who went out of her way to help me out, and was constantly supportive, I have an opinion to express. I went through a hard decision with her. She did try to be a friend, and did try to support me when I felt terrible. But then she would belittle my opinions, treat my ideas like garbage, show zero respect for me when she wasn't in the mood to be nice. And she'd never really apologize for it. She had this basic ... I dunno ... feeling around her I guess ... that I should be thankful for her friendship because I was a social dumpster fire. At times it was like she would completely forget that I had social anxiety and would become one of "those" people. The ones who don't understand that social anxiety is a thing and not an act. And she would do this stuff sober. I can't say there are similarities here between my stuff and yours or that I really understand your situation at all, but ultimately in mine I had to let her spread her bitterness and fly away. If a person makes you feel bad and doesn't seem to care, regardless of who they have been for you in the past, they don't have to stay anyway because they helped you before. This changes, of course, if they were going through a rough patch or some life disaster that might make them P**kly. It's always nice to pay back the kindness. I guess my bad advice for this column is to say that a toxic wart is a toxic wart, even if it used to be a beauty mark.
  2. I'm in the mood for a freshly made donut that's still warm, cut in half to make a sandwich, and filled with a couple of slices of bacon. Like, the good bacon. Not that fatty mess that gets stuck in the teeth. Mmm ... heart attack ...
  3. When I joined up on DF I decided to take on a humorous and unique persona to write about all the stupid in my life. I'd always been unpopular on message boards because I was such a downer. So I threw together some fluff for a board name. One of those dramatic sounding names all the hacks use to sound more important than they actually are. ( The fake persona held on for a little bit. But I eventually got tired of faking it and went back to my regular way of posting. ) The avatar was something I sketched up one day and represents the tranquil side of myself that can keep a level head in tense situations and my chaotic hopeless side that feels completely trapped in my own miserable self made prison.
  4. Sort of ranting. Lots of techno babble. Feel free to ignore. Stuck out in the middle of nowhere is bad enough. But over the past decade or so, it seems like dial-up providers are making an effort to spit in the faces of people who can't get anything better. There are some programs I have used since 1995 that can't even manage a passable connection any more. And I've noticed when I sign on these days that my ISP can't manage a connection speed faster than something around 18 kbps. Back in 1997 I'd average 49 kbps. ( 56 kbps is supposed to be the standard, but that never happens anyway. ) What in the ****** hell? Isn't technology supposed to be improving? I get it. Progress makes sites load heavy because everybody is supposed to be on high speed. Sites take almost ten minutes to load. I can't change that and it isn't my main gripe. I'm just sick of paying ( obscenely high prices when you compare the speed to DSL ) for something I haven't gotten in years. Different computers, different houses, different ISPs. It's always the same story. Connection speeds that would be laughable back in 1989. I mean damn, it's bad enough that I have to be on dial-up in the first place. But molasses-slow speed that make it so that even checking e-mail is something that has to be planned alongside a time-killer while the messages load? It's like being kicked in the face after being knocked down. Even worse is that this current piece of crap I am paying for always connects around 20 kbps, and then without fail slows down to around 8 kbps after about five minutes. It's like they are saying "We are your only option and you will lick our boot while we step on your windpipe.". This thread will take ten minutes to load after I click "post new". I'm going to go make a sandwich.
  5. I'm wretched at giving intelligent feedback and commentary, but I really do hope the jump back to something that seemed to be effective works out. Good to know you didn't get stuck with one of those dimwit types who think they know the secret everyone else refuses to acknowledge.
  6. Find a group of crazies and eccentrics who are my friend despite any apparent flaws in my personality because they know deep down I am a good person.
  7. I absolutely loathe my hometown. I have no friends here. I have no school buddies here. I have no fond memories here. And the local flavor embodies everything I hate about humanity. The only reason I would stay if I could actually afford to escape would be my mother, father, and my sister's kids. But I really can't refuse to step out into the rest of the world just to make everyone else happy. Of course I'd be too afraid to strike out on my own and take a chance at failure without a safety net.
  8. Somewhere cold with a lot of rain if I wanted an ideal. And somewhere with a huge diversity among the local folk. I've had enough of the deep south. So far the candidates are somewhere in northern California, New York, or Washington state. Possibilities that everyone adores taking a massive steaming dump upon by reminding me that those places are too expensive to live in.
  9. A crude joke on a website I won't mention here. And I guess I got a little giddy after downloading a ton of files I needed for the stuff I do when I head back home and away from the internet. My mother's ex-husband's fat little white cat is always hilarious, too. He's like a beach ball. A strangely healthy beach ball.
  10. My meaning in life is relatively simple and perhaps a little depressing. But it's honestly what I strive for. And that meaning is to die without regrets. Knowing I helped loved ones as much as I could. Knowing I at least tried to make the world a better place. Knowing that in the end I am not tearing lasting happiness away from anyone. And maybe knowing that at least one person was sad to see me go. Won't be meeting any of those goals any time soon. So I guess I'll be around for a while.
  11. All I really listen to is instrumental stuff, so I guess it would be that part where the music goes "doot doot doot-dootdoot doot doot doot" and then there's a guitar noise. Awesomeness.
  12. Drinking green tea and watching Psych. And finding that you can't really make friends on video chat websites when you aren't the pretty.
  13. Packaged american cheese and milk by the quarter-gallon. I eat a lot when I can buy it because I usually go for the first half of every month without much of anything to eat and end up getting sick with hunger. Sadly, if I did not gorge on the scraps of food I can find I would not run out of food so quickly.
  14. Why do we have daylight savings time? Seriously. Thirty minutes. Boom. No more screwing with the clock twice a year.
  15. I dunno. Maybe I unconsciously shove people away. I have no idea how to stop it, though. To me it always seems like I keep a consistent attitude and try to keep stuff light and somewhat positive. At least until I feel like everyone lets out an agitated sigh whenever I come around. Then it's just the same garbage I dealt with at the last place and the one before that. So I crash and burn and never return. Whatever the case, if this is how I handle bad times by complaining instead of taking advice, then I need to stop socializing online. Support forum or not, this place doesn't contain the rest of the internet. And if I can't stop myself from getting butthurt over being treated like an absolute stranger by people I've talked to a grand total of maybe once or twice in the past year, then I need to get a cat and learn to use my time to create things. Like making little cat sweaters out of shed out cat fuzz. I act like an old man. I refuse to use shorthand and I will not participate in any serious conversation about reality TV. This whole reply is feeling like an act just to get more attention. I'm done.
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