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About Kristen905

  • Birthday 01/23/1982

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  1. Well its been a little since I wrote. Been busy, my mind has been busy finally!!!!! Only cause i bought a new car and have taken on babysitting in the evenings for my friend to get out of the house for two hours or so. Extra money and keeps my mind busy so thats a plus I think. Meds well this would be week 8 I think, im 50 50 feeling, somedays still feel down, but im waiting till my doctors appointment next week to decide if i should up the dose. I dont know if i should. Im in therapy this will be my fourth session this week so im sure with therapy and drugs i should feel better soon. Depression isnt as bad, just get bored and wonder how i will make it thru the day without sleeping it off. As for sleeping, havent taken a sleep aid in a couple of weeks since last post i think. Fall asleep alright maybe cause ive been so busy and out of the house alot. I just really hope this is a start, and i dont have a month like feb, that was my worst month. I also went out last fri night with a friend, had some drinks and dancing, like i had planned too. Didnt back out of it, even though i was nervous and was going to see people i hadnt seen in months, i stayed till 3am or so, yup i did it. Another exposure. I have group anixety sessions starting soon which will be nice. Everytime I have an anxiety meeting with my therapist its like it brings out the anxiety, is treatment suppose to do that, i get all nervous and anxious prior to the meeting, even when im sitting in the room with her i sometimes feel feelings of panic like im going to pass out and im all tense and sweaty, Anyone else feel like this? I need some help with this guys.Just want all of me back,Im sick of this feeling, i sorta feel normal but still wonder if the prozac is working like it should be. One day i forgot to take my pill and took it late, is that a sign im getting better, or was my mind too busy?
  2. @Lori I havent tried reading, I bought a self help book called Feeling Good, a good book for anxiety and depression a month ago and im on page 72 :( not doing too well with the reading. I usually watch a tv show on my laptop till i feel sleepy. But my muscles are always so tense I hate it. I wish the stiffness in my neck would go away always giving me a headache and i know thats from being anxious. I just wish Lori i would be back to my oldself. 6 weeks back on these meds and to be honest I dont know if they are really working, im sure they are because im able to go out and do things but my thoughts are still all over the place. I fell asleep lastnight at 3am and woke up at 730am having a nightmare and then thinking about how these drugs could be affecting my brain, and if something bad was going to happen to me, never woke up feeling like that. Its like im waitng and waiting for the anxious symptons to just disapear.
  3. Hey guys, ive been having the same problems, Ill be tired but my anxiety is acting up right before bed. I dont know what to do, I keep watchin online shows until im tired and if i really cant sleep i take a sleeping aid. Also if i drink bedtime tea it helps a bit.
  4. So im on week 6 of prozac. Still having weird thoughts. I keep thinking how am i going to get thru an hour, and occupy my mind. Ive been busy today but it dosent seem to help. Just wish it would kick in already. Im only taking 20mg and used to take 40mg wondering if im going to have to up my dose. Dont really wanna but i think i might have to. This weekend I didnt go out much, although ive made myself do exposures like going to the mall and getting out of the house. I work frm home during the day so i dont get out much, ive decided to help my friend with her kids and babysit for a couple of hours three times a week, i hope this helps with my mind. My therapist also wants me to start walking again and maybe working out, i hope that helps too. I just wish i didnt have the fear of having anxiety wish that woudl be gone already, i know its been over a month. Just keep thinkin the last outburst of anxeity i had years back only lasted a couple of weeks and it faded away and so did the symptons jus sucks when you wake up and the first thing is your neck being all tense and stiff and that slight headache and you cant concentrate. Hope by the end of the week the meds are really working like they are suppose to. Im not 100 percent i feel 50.
  5. Thoughts id update you guys. So tommorrow will be ONE MONTH on Prozac again. I did my bestfriends bday party, i didnt die, but felt like i was going to at times, not to mention i was a sweaty mess. I did actually end up eating in front of everyone even when i was anxious, which i was scared of, cause when im anxious eating is the last thing i want to do. I drove down to the resturant with friend that i hadnt seen in forever that i had stopped talkin to. Which was a little stressful, but now we are bck to being friends so that was a test for me. I got there at 630 stayed till 1030 and drove home, I DID IT, my exposure was ok. I think we need to put ourselves in those situations that make us feel bad or like we are going to have a panic attack or anxiety. I did it again on thurs night too. Went to the dealership to find out about some car prices, when the sales rep was talkin to me felt like it was going in one ear and out the nex, got umcomfortable a couple of times, but i survived. Today im having a blah day, feeling sick, stomach hurting and head pounding and sweaty throat kinda acting up too. Im anxious yes i am, usuallly im finding the weekend does that to me cause i dont get up and work its my free time, i kinda dont like having free time now. So im hoping that the meds start to really kick in since its week four now. This month has been so hard for me, somedays for a moment i feel normal, and i feel like im back but then theres days like today where i struggle thinking how am i going to make it to tonight, i hate that. How do we control those bad thoughts of omg here comes another panic attack or is it coming back?????. I didnt have therapy this week as she is off for march break, wonder if that kinda scared me a little. Tonight is my friends bday party, so we are most likely going to go out and do something, wish me luck, i havent been to a bar or club since all this happened over a month ago. i have to be strong although im so scared inside.
  6. Mine makes me angry. I hate the thought of everyday having these feelings or symptoms. It makes me mad esp when i want to do the normal things i did a month back. Its a cycle, it will come and go. Im in therapy now, doing CBT again, hopefully this helps, I know they say medication does help, mine sorta is, im on day 30 of it, guess i have like two more weeks to get the full benefits of the drug. I just wish we could wake up and not feel the symptons or have the fear of it coming back. I hate that.
  7. My anxiety stops me from going out with my friends, enjoying the weekend, relaxing in the evening even just watchin tv, it also has gotten in the way of my relationship with a new partner, he dosent understand what it really is about. Sometimes i think he feels im crazy. Im glad to know there are people like me out there who suffer from it, and its normal to not want to go out, or feel stange when you are out in situations in fear that the panic attack will come along, or to even be shopping and all you feel is symptons. I hate it, Been a month back on meds and i really hope that they start working to the full potential soon. i just want my life back.
  8. I have it all day long, well most days these days. Ive been stuggling with anxiety and panic attacks since i was 9, and now im 30. Although this last time i hadnt had a bad episode of it for a couple of years. I feel like it all day,dont feel normal. My throat feels weird, sweaty feet, head hurts, dizzy sometimes and my thoughts are all over the place. Im back on medication now after years of being off of it, i think its helping. Also i joined an anxiety group that lasts 8 months, with some CBT therapy and one on one, So i hope that helps. I know how you feel, the whole day feeling like this sucks, I just wish i could go back to when i could just take a nap, or watch tv and not have lumps in my throat tension in my neck or a heavy chest.
  9. Every morning i wake up with a stomach ache, i am not at a month on prozac. Sometimes im hungry sometimes im not. There are days where i crave everything, and others where i dont feel too eat or im really thirsty. Probably dosent help that i crave Coke to drink. Pop isnt so good for your tummy either. Not to mention it makes you go to the washroom all the time, I dont remember being like this the lastime i took prozac.
  10. Hey guys, As for me sleeping, I havent been taking anything now, bought some sleeping pills but its like now that i know i have that to take i can sleep, its so weird. I took a half a pill twice a couple nights back and i slept fine. Every morning im getting up early still at like 8am not so used to that, and i fall back asleep for a little. Tommorrow will be a month that I have been on prozac, yup i made it to 30 days. Still having thoughts of what am i going to do the whole day, what can i focus on and stuggling. Didnt have a therapy session this week as she is off for march break which kinda put me in this mood. Im thinking maybe its time for me to read a book i bought on depression n anxiety, called feeling good. I dunno seems like the weekends drag out to me, since im not workng and its my free time.
  11. So today is a big day for me. and exposure, going to my friends bday dinner downtown at a resturant that has a trivia game too going on. Im so nervous i have to be there for 6pm trivia starts at 8pm how am i going to last the whole time? I know its dinner and drinks and stuff but im so scared of having anxiety the whole time or feeling weird in front of everyone. THere is only 6 of us going, and i know everyone but its still bothering me. I need some help guys!!!!!!!!, I know I need to do this, and its the anxiety telling me not to go, honestly stomach has been turning all morning long. I wish these meds would kick in already, Im almost one month in, and still having my days with stupid thoughts of when am i gonna feel anxious and zoned out. God i hope these start to work soon, this is taking forever now. Ive been fallin asleep without taking anything at night i guess which is a good thing, although lastnight took a sleepin aid, half of one, so i could sleep cause of today. Oh Gosh I hope today goes by ok, and I can make it, Im driving myself down there which is like a 45min drive, and then the resturant how am i gonna sit through this??????
  12. Keep on going, I know how it feels im back on my meds after years of not taking them, had to, got stuck in a rut with all this anxiety and panic. Now im almost a month in and i still have my bad days where im restless wondering when is the next one going to come, its the fear of fear of having one. We all have our bad days, just have to remember the good ones, and how we are when we are well. Youll be there soon. Keep on going.
  13. These fourms help me tons, also i like to take a hot bath, or go online ebay, or watch a series of shows online. Also my blkberry keeps my mind off of things i usually just msg on bbm and talk to my boyfriend or friends. Even go and watch tv with my mother downstairs if its really bad.
  14. Ive lost 14lbs since i started a month ago, every morning i wake up with a tummy ache. I dont know if thats from the anxiety or the meds. Im on 20mg a day, almost a month now. I kinda like that ive lost hte weight, but i know once im comfortable it will come back on.
  15. Day 27, Lets say that lastnight was hell!!!! I couldnt sleep at all which kept bringing out my anxiety, I must of slept for four hours total due to taking a sleeping aid. I wonder if its the prozac that does that. The only good thing that came out of yesterday was that I did take a nap, which i havent been able to do since ive been having my horrible anxiety. I feel asleep for two hours which prolly contributed to me not being able to sleep later on in the night. As for my meds, Im feeling ok, last two days having those anxious thoughts again of what am i going to do for the whole day, and the whole night, how am i going to make it, is it going to come back, am i normal, those are the questions that are constantly going thru my head. I sometimes wonder what you guys do or say to yourselves when you start feeling and thinking like that. Would help if you guys could give me some suggestions. I usually come on here and read some posts, or go on ebay or facebook and try to take my mind off of it like that. But i still dont get why im still having those thoughts. Im almost at a month of 20mg a day of prozac with a couple of pills left and im going back to the doc this week to get a prescription. Also this week i have no therpy session as she is off for march break, kinda make sme nervous cause that was my outlet for the past two weeks and at the end of the week was something i could look foward to and possibly make me feel better for the weekend. I know thats not a good thing to rely on someone to make you feel good but it gave me hope. I have a big weekend coming up, bestfriends bday dinner this wed, which im nervous about and her bday party on the weekend, I just want to be normal and n ot worrying about having a panic attack when im out with her;, id love to go out and not have my throat all tight and my neck so tense, that would be great. I keep getting tension headaches last two days which are driving me nuts. Took something for it, advil, so i hope that helps. We are allowed to take advil while we are on ADs right? i swear i read somewhere that we should take them. Anyways well c how today goes, Im so nervous for sleeping tonight because of lastnight, I just want my pills to be working in full force already!!!!!!!!!!! its almost a month. Ive been trying so hard.
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