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CGray

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  1. That's odd. How did you go about getting that done?
  2. Do you not find therapists patronising? Specially when there doesn't appear to be a root behavioural cause so they seem frutiless and I don't have any apparent neg feelings uinless its deeeeep
  3. Ok, thank. I cannot identify a root cause and as someone who's pretty insightful, I am suprised. I just can't BARE to don ANYTHING
  4. Yeah, you've got to take baby steps. I used to be very angry and would often lash out on people - i.e. grabbing people, punching people etc. now I have calmed down a lot and I scaled it down to shouting, and destroying things occasionally. It's hard to implement one of these techniques in the heat of the moment, but if you are persistent at trying it eventually it'll become second nature.
  5. Good post - the world would be a better place if everybody understood this.
  6. Hey everyone, I made a post previously talking about how I didn't know what I was suffering from was severe depression etc - and I'd like to continue with that, hopefully the end goal getting some answers or opinions. (previous background post - http://www.depressionforums.org/forums/topic/75681-is-this-what-you-call-depression/) Long story short: Been on various dose Citalopram, Sertaline and Fluoxetine - all either made me worse (in terms of suicidal, or numb, zombie like and being unable to feel anything) I'm 20, really quite intelligent, theoretically got everything going for me... practically not. Irrespective of what medication I am on or what I do (change eating, exercise etc) my mood is either neutral, severely depressed and suicidal or in the case with Sertaline, numb. Sadly, never happy, cheerful or motivated - however much I try. My doctor has recently took me off of SSRI's as he is going to refer me to a Psychiatrist as he is unable to try anything else..... Even off of them, I don't ALWAYS feel sad, depressed, suicidal (some times I do) but the alternative even without them is tired, blunt, lethargic, unmotivated, never happy. The concept of happiness is beyond me now. I don't think I can remember what it feels like. Even on a good day when I don't consider myself in a 'dark place' I struggle to get out of bed, hold conversation, clean dishes etc... everything jus appears to be so horribly pointless. Any ideas? Any opinions would be great, and even if you share what anti-depressants made you feel like? Happy, motivated, what?!?! What's going on.. It's got to the point where I don't understand how I am 'supposed' to feel, or whether feeling like this is normal, or what... Very confused... Thanks
  7. Thanks for the words of encouragement. It is helpful to hear other people's stories. @angoisse14 - good luck with yours. I used to meditate but I found that my inability to hold my attention made it impossible. I am going to have to start training myself cognitively like you. @Jimbow15 - thanks, it means a lot to hear it. I'll probably book a doctors appointment soon see if he up's it to 30\40mg. It's nice to hear a positive spin on things for once. Gives me that little bit of hope
  8. Hi, I'm new here I've been suffering for the past five years - I''m feeling neutral/down at the moment, but by far not the most severely down I get. I want your opinions. Here is a quick bit of background info: have a lovely girlfriend, 19 years of age, studying Psychology at Uni, have caring parents and family and on paper I should be a happy man as I am fairly intelligent and have everything that should be there. I've been prescribed 20mg Citalopram, waiting to hear back for CBT, and while it helps the moods not be so severe, it is still disabling me, emotionally and physically. Like many other depressed people, getting out of bed is a choir, as is showering - let alone keeping up with my studies. I am a fairly sociable person but I am apparently odd to say the least. I laugh at inappropriate things other people call sick, I struggle to feel normal emotions like most people (happiness, guilt, maybe even sadness), feel anger and emptiness and often get described as 'evil' and 'messed up in the head' despite people not knowing what mental illness - if any, I suffer from. The thing which is the worse is the lack of motivation and ambition - I cannot bare doing ANY of the activities I used to do (gym 5x a week). How do I get this 'physical' or 'emotional' drive that people label as ambition. Call me naive, but I cannot ever recall feeling that. Anyone care to share any tips, thoughts or anything else. Do you think it sounds like depression? or Depression with mere personality flaws? or other illnesses
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