twotone

Hi, good luck with your new medication and thanks for posting here. I too have increased my prozac dose without sucess. I think prozac for me at the lowered dose has brightened my mood a bit at times but not consistantly. I think its strange times in enforced isolation so difficult to judge how well we are. I use meditaion and mindfulness to help elivate symptoms. eg if you can remember how you felt when you when for a walk in the sunshine, you could try to bring that feeling to mind during meditation. Also maybe your gp has told you and from my personal experience, changing doses of antidepressants can affect mood and can take quite a while to get into the bloodstream. this is the same aas for new medication. Good luck and be well.

Hi @JessieJake, thanks for your feedback and great news that you fell well enough to come off these. I've no expeerience of coming off prozac so cant comment except when useful to tell us your experience thanks and good luck

Thanks for updating and still battling. Its a strange time to start a recovery for us both. probably when we need more social inclusion, interaction to aid healing, we have pandemic isolation.Hope your increased dosage gives good results

had to look that one up 😜 , yes your post sent my head spinning @Atra, watch out..., deep breaths. No seriously, I can see things that return my faith in humanity in this time of adversity. In the UK 0.5 million people have voluntered to be nhs responders to deliver shopping or medicine, ferry people back from hospital or just chatting on the phone to self isolators or vunerable people. Also I read on the news today that the government have called to house all homless people. Now of course this may be reactionary and not a permanant shift in policy or maybe this is the start of a more caring society? Hell, lets just cut to the chase, why not give everybody a liveable wage whatever their ability to earn it? I would agree it's going to evolve more gradually once we all get through this. I would say these are very useful to pass on but I would reckon you have greater qualities to pass on: empathy, compassion, listening skills and probably most valuable emotional intelligence. Also, helping others can elevate your spirit and a great thing to do for yourself. Ah yes, forgot to mention 'resiliance'. You'll need bags of that, think I'll go for the deliver shopping and medicine option!

On the news today, there's a charity in the UK that has seen a 3 fold increase in anxiety related calls. There advice was : dont watch the news too much, find something that interests you, and exercise. Hmm , think I've been overthinking this 😜

Hi @claudialaver, that's good news for your friend. Could you share some of what has helped your friend, psychotherapist, CBT ..?

Hi @Wifeylol, sorry for your pain and suffering, I'd reckon that I'm familiar with the kind of pain you are feeling. What may help is a look at my understanding of 'conciousness' as apposed to concious thought. I believe these are different. So stuff we come up with or conjour in our minds are 'just thoughts'. In our concious mind we can look at our thoughts and decide if we really think they are valid. If they are subconcious, it's more difficult to do that at least for me, however they are still 'just thoughts' conjured by your mind. So, how can we look at our thoughts from a better place, especially those self distructive thoughts that we are all so familiar with and what do we do with them? well I'm still working on this one but 'my' understanding so far.. We have to look for a deeper place within us, this is well documented in many regelions, beliefs eg Buddah nature, soul as you mention, conciousness. One can seek this place by being in the 'present moment' and being able to look at your thoughts, not block them but give them consideration from a new perspective. I believe that it is this deep place that lives on and not ones mind

Hi @Atra, Really good satire😁 Close to the bone, but it helps to laugh about our affliction s, right? Think of your favourite comedian who you'd like to deliver it in standup? Mine would be Alexi Sayle a Scouse comedian in the UK, yours?

Hi @Devlinkyla, I care, I understand how brutal this illness can be leaving us bereft of hope at difficult times. It can leave us to 'struggle for life' and just doing enough to survive is admirable. For those of us unfortunate of us to experience this it's hard to use language to describe the extent or gravity of the suffering that is experienced. I also agree with @iWantRope in that we must look after ourselves. Look from within, not paying too much attention to your thoughs but to the present moment.

Hi @Natasha1, I feel for you as I have felt the same way especially at work for many years. Silence and exclusion seems the hardest thing to deal with. What comes to mind is the Serenity prayer. Hope it can give you some comfort God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.

Hi @el_zee and welcome. Sorry for your suffering. Here you will find people that have had/ are having a journey with similarities to yours. I remember asking similar questions and agree with @Atra that for me the answers have always layed within. They are often hard and uncomfortable truths that are revealed slowly in the healing process (as the fog clears) . We are all different and you will find that each of us approaches depression in different ways in terms of healing and advice that alleviates symptoms. I am unable to answer your questions also, however encourage you to keep an open mind and try things that help you on the path of healing. What has served me is to build from small to start on this path. Try one thing to improve your day even if it's just feels like going through the motions (eg fill the bird feeder, buy a pill box to make it easier to remember to take your pills every day) Try to build on this each day, but dont beat yourself up if you miss a day or two. best wishes on your journey

Thank you @hendricksbrock for your encouraging words. Russell Brand said that big companies asking the state for a bailout is just the same as a mentally ill person asking for help. You know that when you can't fix stuff thats not in your control, you ask for help. When we come out the other end, lets hope that things will be better..

Hi @louis2008, I had a similar relationship with my father, maybe weeks would go by in the house with silence from him. Other times were just practical talk as you say. In fact in his native language, I still to this day cannot express emotional feeling. I can't add much to @mmd reply except to try before it is too late. I wish I had this advice maybe 30 years or more ago. I wish you the best, and your English reads well.

Hi @Kenneth8825, sorry for your suffering. Yes our past can way heavily on us and we could be fearful for the future especially in these unusual times. That leaves us with the present in which to change our perspective. Looking at younger members of family I can see they play happily for the moment, free of burdens of past and future. Maybe the answer to your question might lie there? I'm a good bit older than you and have had maybe a similar journey to you in some ways. I hope you can get a little relief from your suffering.

Oh man, I can empathise with your plight and suffering. I'm probably older than you and still search for answers and practises (healthy ones) that lessen the symptoms . Feels like a lifetime of work. One thing that does keep me going is my belief that we all are much more than just our thoughts. My 'thoughts' have got me into trouble mischief and conflict in the past even without conciously intending to do so (mostly I think). Reaching for a deeper place I hope I can watch for these thoughts, acknowlege them and see them from a different perspective, If you can 'catch' your thoughts, particulary the destructive or unhelpful ones, you will be observing your thoughts from the deeper place. It of course immensly helpful to write down those particularly destructive (self loathing, boy, I know about that!) to help distance from these thoughts and gain a perspective on them. So that when they return, it's easier to catch, distance and go to that deeper place. I hope this doesn't come across as evangelising as I'm far from 'living the dream'. In fact struggling to stay in this seat long enough to write this! It's really useful that you have written these thoughts out and encourage you to keep on searching.

So sorry about your suffering. Rollercoaster ride for me too. I wish you some relief soon. Be sure to try to be kind to yourself in this difficult time. Something that helps me some especially during extreme difficult times/ moments is to try 'coming to my senses'. Sounds a bit spacey but open your eyes and ears and observe. Look at your hands and acknowledge or concentrate on your breath. That's the first step in taking me away from the bad mental chatter. Bbe sure to look after yourself during this time

Hi @Infinite Sequence, so sorry to hear about your suffering and glad you found this safe place to share. Your Therapist has given you good advice, in my opinion and even in extreme times, just focus your mind on your breath. Inhale deeply, filling your stomoch so that it is extended, then slowly exhale, constricting your throught a little for an extended exhale. It may be a little difficult at first and I remember during extreme stress my breathing was shallow. After a while I can feel that my breath is my safe place. I hope you can too. Ask your therapist about meditation which can help you with this technique and make it part of your life. I try to do this every night and I'm sure it helps. There are apps on the phone that can guide you. I use one called insight timer

I would think that crying is a emotional release which is a positive sign for you. I guess you've gone through an awful lot lately and even though prozac is heping you to block the 'bad stuff, in my experience connecting emotionally to some of the consequences of the 'bad stuff' is on the path to healing. It's a hard but neccesary path. On a side note, my doc. upped my dose to 40mg the other day and I'm getting a bit of twitching of me feet/ legs at night time. not as much as when i was on Paroxatine some time ago. That's why I changed and as @jkd_sd said it's supposed to be a cleaner drug with fewer side effects.

I want to let go of subconscious stream of thoughts that wake me several times in the nightime, each time leaving me in a state of fear.

Hi @Natasha1, I'd like to chime in by saying what a vital resource depressionforums has in the past and is currently such a vital lifeline to many during hard times. Personally I've taken on a greater understanding of this illness through shared posts and aproaches by people here that help me get through the most difficult of times. Thank you for being part of this, I wish you peace.

Thank you Lindsay for making me feel of value here and now. Yes please, use this thread for posting, I look forward to reading with great interest.

Just wanted to share a talk that I came across recently that has helped me in my quest to reduce anxiety. Here thoughts going round and round in your head that can cause anxious feelings can be countered by beautiful words either in song or prose or thoughts from your past. Of course maybe we didn't experience the 'warm and tender childhood that she experienced, to look back on. But never the less, when hearing songs or reading prose that I love, I can see that I am 'uplifted' even in my current state of unwellness. You can find her talk by googling: Insight timer Innerspace glasgow mastering anxiety I find her words powerful and come back to them often. Hope it can be of help to you if you suffer.

thanks for the update @BrainRot and good news

Hi @Bowser, yes, sleep is precious and insomnia often follows quickly when I fall into depression. things I have learnt to try to manage it: Try not to clockwatch when you awaken. try to gently accept that your sleep will be impaired during this time and try not to fight it Try to have good sleep routines, ie time you go to bed, reduced stimulus before bedtime meditation helps to calm as @Depressedgurl007 mentions just before bedtime. I use an app called insight timer (free stuff on there too) Breathing techniques to get me through high anxiety times or even just bad subconcious thoughts. Its name is 7:11 breathing, Ujay breaths or oceanic breathing. It tricks the mind into beliving its z time (sometimes) and is good for a little minfullness break your mind off your subconsious stream of thoughts I'm sorry you've been through so much pain with your medication history. Clock change also means a change of season. I know here in the northern hemisphere where a fall clock can heighten my negative thoughts? I wish you some peace and some sleep resulting. Let me know if youd like more info on any of the stuff I've mentioned

Yes, this thread has got me thinking, thanks @Na15 your points are very valid. In terms of facing depression I used to look at it like bunker mentality, try to make things easier for me when depressed. I've picked up a few things that a least help a bit over the years: meditation, breathing, showers everyday, building things up very slowly (must be a name for that!), I connect with so many comments in this thread, the pain and devestation that depression has wreaked over my life is real, and yet I still have lots to live for. Life is an emotional struggle for me, just sometimes it goes into the red, and boy, when it does!