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About levittfan

  • Birthday 04/03/1988

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    Sweet Home Alabama

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  1. I work for a pretty big retail chain that has stores in multiple locations, and the store I currently work at is about twenty minutes away in another town. All in all, not that bad of a drive. Recently, a position at a store just three minutes away from me became available. The only problem is that the position is part time. I would still make enough to cover bills and what not, I'm just not sure that it's wise to give up a full time position for a part time one. The reason why I'm even considering it is because the store I'm at is kind of a hell hole. The people, not including management, are great, but everything is so disorganized. The store orders too much merchandise and we don't even have enough workers on my shift. I would love the welcome break of only working four days a week instead of five, but as I mentioned I don't know if going from full time to part time is a good idea. Most people would **** for a full time job with benefits. I don't know. I'm just rambling.
  2. I feel you on this one. After I graduated high school I became a morose shut in. No job, no friends, no life at all for eight years. But now that I do actually have a job my coworkers naturally ask questions about my life. When they ask where I worked before my current job I have to make up a lie because it's to awkward and humiliating to admit the truth. When they ask why I'm not dating anyone or why I haven't dated since high school out comes another lie.
  3. Are you me? I too graduated roughly ten years ago, no friends, no long term employment. I was just filling out some job applications and felt awful when I got to the employment history part because I haven't really done anything since high school. I once loved reading and writing, but now everything I read leaves me unsatisfied, and every time I try to write my "great" ideas immediately turn into jumbled, unfocused messes. Long story short, you're definitely not alone. Like breakfastclub said, It's a good idea to look into professional help, and of course keep posting here if you need to.
  4. INTJ here. I know some people are critical of tests like this, and rightly so since the questions are kinda vague, but I found my results to be shockingly accurate. While depression has amped up and intensified some of my traits, I've always pretty much been an INTJ.
  5. I was just reading an article about IBS, and several studies have found that up to 60% of people suffering from it also have depression and/or anxiety. This made me curious about how many depression/anxiety sufferers may be dealing with some type of gastrointestinal issue, not necessarily IBS, mind you. I myself have never been formally diagnosed with IBS or anything similar, but when I look back I've been dealing with gastrointestinal issues ever since I was a kid. Coincidentally, I've also had anxiety since childhood as well. Depression didn't kick in until adulthood, though. As my mental health as gotten worse so has my gut. So, are any of y'all struggling with gastrointestinal problems? Thanks for reading!
  6. I know this feeling. I have good days and bad days. On the good days I'm optimistic and hopeful. Life doesn't seem so pointless and agonizing, you know. But if I stop and let my mind start contemplating things I get overwhelmed with thoughts of just throwing in the towel. And it's not like I'm even rock bottom depressed. I think you should immediately look into getting professional help if you aren't already involved with any, especially since your thoughts are getting worse. I also suggest you visit the section of the forums marked suicide/crisis intervention. For me, seeking help and info online usually takes some of the edge off. My thoughts are with you.
  7. That guy sounds mentally unstable and deranged. I wouldn't walk in that area anymore if I was you. Violence should be a last resort. You did the right thing by avoiding a potentially dangerous situation. Nothing cowardly about it.
  8. Hello Sheeba630! You don't have to worry about putting on a happy face here. We're all in the same boat, so we know what you're going through. First off, if you haven't already sought out some type of professional help then you should really do so, if it's available to you. Time only exacerbates mental illness, so the sooner you get help the better. I'm sorry you had such a rough childhood. It's so sad that the people closest to you often hurt you the most. You didn't deserve any of that. Your parents were broken, so they took their anger, frustration, pain out on you. Abuse is always about the abuser, not the abused. You're not unworthy trash. Your parents wanted to make you feel that way because that's probably how THEY felt, which is probably how their abusive parents felt as well. As far as your love life goes, could it be possible that you've fallen into a pattern of seeking out the wrong guys? Because people who use others in order to fulfill their own selfish needs/emotions don't usually hide that part of their personality. I'm willing to bet these guys give off warning signs in the very beginning. If you want a serious, monagamous relationship then that's what you need to look for. Be upfront about what you want and don't settle for someone who treats you sub par. Like I said before, you're not unworthy trash and you don't deserve to be treated that way. I hope these forums prove to be helpful for you. At the very least I hope they show you that you're not alone. Best wishes.
  9. Welcome Ministry88! So sorry to hear that you had to deal with two unfortunate events at the same time. Those things may have knocked you back, but at least you're still willing to put up a fight. I hope your experience here is a positive one.
  10. I agree with both mzkd and LIO. I mean really, if somebody has to take medication in order to function normally, doesn't that make them ill? Your mom hasn't realized this correlation for some reason, possibly because she's afraid to address the seriousness of your situation. Even though she's supportive of you going to therapy and taking meds she probably associates the phrase "mental illness" with bad things, like most of society unfortunately. You should voice your concerns the next time she does something like this.
  11. Hello Honeypot, I'm dealing with a bit of hopelessness myself right now. It sucks to look around and see everyone else achieving things while you're just stuck in neutral. And this is probably going to sound trite, but you can't compare yourself to others. I know it's easier said than done, but it's true. Looking enviously at others is counterproductive and mostly just causes mental agony. You mentioned taking meds. You should talk to your doc about changing them if they aren't working. Therapy would also be highly beneficial as well. Some people can get better simply by taking meds, but it seems that most people need meds + therapy in order to fully benefit. Hope you feel better.
  12. You seem to be under the impression that one can "think" their way out of depression. I can't blame you for this assumption since society just tells us to "think happy thoughts!" while stubbornly refusing to acknowledge depression as a legitimate illness. And while it's true that positive thinking and mental awareness do help, one simply can't just tell themselves to get better. You need to seek out professional help if possible. That way you'll have a much better chance of getting a handle on your issues.
  13. Can you report your boss to somebody higher up? I don't know where you're from, but what he's doing sounds illegal, or at least against company policy. Most businesses have protocols to handle things like this. Don't bother even thinking about apologizing, because you've done nothing wrong. Look into what legal/professional actions you can take against this bully.
  14. Not to sound like a complete misanthrope, but I often look at our species as the worst to ever walk the earth. Sure, we have instincts like any other animal, but we also have the ability to reason and self-reflect. We have the ability to know better AND do better, but we don't. We destroy not only our own species but the rest of the world as well. What other species foolishly destroys its own habitat? Even if another such species exists it doesn't have the power to realize its errors like we do. I don't mean to sound superior because trust me, I'm far from perfect and I'll never be perfect, but at least I try to acknowledge and work on my unappealing behaviors. A lot of people revel in their negative behavior. Sorry, rant over. I crave closeness as well, but feel like i'll never be able to truly open up to anybody because what's the point? It'll probably just blow up in my face in the long run. I'm optimistic enough to believe that decent people are out there, but pessimistic enough to believe that such people are rare. Heck, I might not even be one, though I try and hope that I am. Best wishes to your granddad.
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