sober4life

It breaks my heart seeing you upset. I can't stand it. I'm not used to people liking me and missing me and wanting me around. Isn't that sad?

I'll be there soon.

I've had a lot of fun here and I love everyone here but I think everyone eventually reaches that day when it's time for them move on. Today is my day and this is my last post.

I've heard comments from people I know. You're the most paranoid person on earth and you got the shots! Yep I'm the outsider that wants to go unnoticed and fly under the radar so to speak. I'm not sure it has anything to do with any of my beliefs. I play just enough of "the game" in this life so I can fade into the background. Years down the road when people ask themselves what I was doing during these times nobody will even have an answer and that's how I like it.

The parks here are all government parks. If they put up a wall they wouldn't be able to hand out fines to people for sneaking into the parks. Plus like I said it's a government park which means they get money from taxes and charge 10 dollars to get in and charge to rent boats and rent cabins and charge people to park their campers there and they charge 3 times as much for everything at their stores and gift shops and at the year throw up their hands and say they have no money to make improvements and they beg for more money.

My mind was trying to scare me today. I was down at the fence petting the cows and someone drove up to the house and tried to rob the place. I was scared to death. Then two of my friends ran up to try to stop them and I laughed and said you almost had me this is a dream. I'm never going to have friends.

That is strange. I've never been to a park that has a wall.

It's all peace of mind for me. I've had 3 shots now. I'm going to get the covid shot and the flu shot every year. How does someone think all of this has affected me? I was afraid of people before. Now I feel the same way with people as I do with poison ivy. I'm afraid to even touch them or be anywhere near them.

We're hurting from all the snow shoveling @duckI learned my lesson after last year though. I used to shovel every speck of snow and it about killed me. I don't do that anymore. I make it so I can get out of here and I don't care about the rest. The porches? It's actually better to keep the snow on them so nobody wants to come in here.

16F today. That's the funny thing about groundhog day yesterday. There's zero chance you're going to see a groundhog on that day in the wild in Pennsylvania so of course he's angry and wants to go back in his hole.

Any time I have to speak in front of a large audience I try to put it out of my mind until the very second I have to speak. I'm not going to remember anything I practice at all. Practicing will just make me a nervous wreck. If I have to speak about something I can't go in and wing it it's not something I should be talking about in front of a large audience and it's not the audience I should have in my life anyway.

I have no faith in the world anymore. I absolutely believe they put a fake spy balloon into the sky to distract us from something real they're trying to sneak past us. So what are they up to?

I have to laugh. How the hell did I get advertisements for Porsche and Mercedes and Men's Wearhouse?

I get it. We seem to get injuries from unexpected things. I can work all day doing hard work and never have much trouble. I can honestly say I've gotten pulled muscles most times from sneezing or coughing.If surgery worked before I hope it works again. Both of the people I talked about also got surgery and they did have to take months off work but they did recover.

I hope they can fix your rotator cuff. I know my brother and my dad had the same issue and they're back to normal as far as I can tell. I know you. You're tough as hell. I know you're going to get through all of this and be back to your old self and there's nothing and nobody on earth that can stop you.