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Everything posted by whatchagonnado

  1. Loose ? You mean the woman ( I hope it is a woman, and not a girl ) will have had sex with at least one other man ? What does that make the men. You are telling him to pretty much prey on women, especially those you deem as nothing but some holes. This is the kind of garbage that perpetuates the attitudes that women are categories, and should be used accordingly.
  2. Thank you both. Tomorrow is the day I will know whether or not we both get relief. My heart is pounding and my hands are sweaty. What if she says no. What will I do. I cannot rehome him as he's a skittish cat and he's only known me for the last 11 years. I am so down and trying to keep bad thoughts at bay.
  3. So very sad. I cannot take care of my kitty who has what might be kidney disease. I have an appointment with a vet on Thursday and I hope they sign off on euthanizing my dear boy. I sent an email to the doctor so that I could better explain how I can't not only afford his care, but also can't emotionally and physically care for a kitty who will need growing care as the disease progresses. I am so scared that they will refuse. I wish I could care for him and I wish he could live forever. I will be completely alone once he's gone.
  4. Wait. You go on and on about women using you, and here you are talking about using a woman you know is looking for something serious. Really ? You really are all about you. Has it ever occurred to you that other people can also have difficulties with communication and knowing what they want and figuring out how to explain those things ? That it's not only you who struggles with things ? * ETA - I see you said that it pi*ses you off that some women act a certain way on these dating sites and ' just ' want to chat, etc. And there you are, knowing a woman is looking for something serious and you are going to use her as " more experience ". What the ever-loving?
  5. Some men like to bash feminists whenever they can. The problem with his post was that he thought he was being reasonable and not asking for too much, considering he had sex with a fat woman. I wasn't caring about inner beauty or whatever. What he said and my response obviously went over your head. Ah, not I am outing myself as one of those feminists. * insert eye roll here *
  6. " The only woman in my 32 years who willingly engaged in anything close to sex with me (she insisted on dry humping and me eating her out) was like 250 pounds at best. I don't really think looks are at the top of my requirements list " What a horrible thing to say.
  7. Amanda, that exhausting just reading that. If there is absolutely anywhere you can go and be away from him, try. What is the point of looking for " solutions ". Relationships are these things that have rules, and there is no rule that you should try and work something out that is so horrible. If you have the means, get out.
  8. Summer. I don't like it. I am tired of the supposed joys of it being shoved down my throat. Many people hate Summer. I am tired of the heat and the constant bright light. When it starts raining here in the PNW, I will be happily gloating to all those who bang on about heat and all the gross things associated with it. Summer sucks.
  9. Many men these days are saying they are angry and bitter, and I always see flashing yellow lights when I read or hear it. It's threatening, saying that people, meaning women, need to stop doing something that make men angry and bitter.
  10. You told your wife about that ? That is a very low thing you did to this person you say is your everything. Make a decision as to whether or not you stay with your wife. She obviously cannot reciprocate in the sex department at this time, so don't make her feel guilty for that, which is what you wanted to do by telling her. Why else ? You are not getting what you physically want, and she is trying to survive actual life. No one is in the hospital for a month because they are just feeling down. Now, since you felt a need to tell her this horrible thing, she gets to have that in her mind. She isn't a machine, sexual or otherwise, and if ten months is too much of a burden, then you should seriously consider why you are still around.
  11. He won't end up homeless. He will find someone else to abuse and manipulate. His being abusive should be what you think about when you start feeling sorry for him. I would leave as soon as possible and have friends be with you when you do. Be careful.
  12. Grace, he just wants to be friends. Anything else seems to me as him wanting to keep you around, in a way and to a degree, while he get's through whatever it is going on with him. It's unfortunate that others have walked away from him ( and I hope he has told you in honesty why that happened ), but do not allow damage to you and your life just so he can have someone kind of around.
  13. Teddy, that is your opinion and you of course are welcome to it. I've seen plenty to understand what's going on.
  14. You sure do know everything about women who are alone, don't you. Oh wait, very few women are alone, according to you. And, why are you still open to meeting this woman ? If you are that offended by what she says, then don't meet her. Sorry, but that seems like you want her to not apologize or whatever. It's like you get some satisfaction over saying ' ah-HA ! ' when a woman is being a jerk, just so you can make note of how you never get what you think is a fair shake. She said what she did. You then need to make the decision, but she doesn't owe you a response. Why do you want a response.
  15. Worrying about something that won't even be an initial ' thing ' for probably 8 months.
  16. The OP is also dismissing women, many of whom might feel the same. Many women are " forever-alone ". I will agree that bitterness won't attract anyone.
  17. More attracted to personality. LOL That's what many men say in order to make themselves feel better. If you want to go the tired ' procreation ' route, then women would absolutely be choosing men who were the best ' speciman's '. They would want someone who body was strong, agile, and features that told her that her offspring would perhaps have fewer ' issues '. Perhaps. Women would also then be wanting men who are good providers, etc. So men should be careful when they bring out the ' just can't help it '. To the OP - Your boyfriend doesn't have to continue being with you, or being attracted to you, but that he sticks around, why, hoping you will lose weight ? Nah, that's where you remove him from your life.
  18. Hmmmmm, I don't call not getting pretty much exactly what any of us want in a romantic-sexual partner, discrimination. Those two things are not necessary to live. Food is extremely necessary.
  19. It's a ridiculous mantra that women ( het, of course ) aren't into whatever physical traits. Many really great looking men, according to whatever silly social standard, are also great relationship material. You aren't owed a woman, and I think that is one of the reasons you are so angry and frustrated. Many people are attracted to many ' types '. So what you see as someone " settling " for someone, might just be that they happened to like the total package better. Women don't have to like you or want to be with you. None of us are owed what you are angry about.
  20. Listening to your gut is not at all a bad idea. Many women believe that when they run into men who are porn obsessed,( in whatever way ) they need to push aside their own feelings. Takes a lot of energy that could be better spent elsewhere. Good luck to you. :)
  21. Went out and about with my sister. It was nice and I enjoyed myself and let myself enjoy the day. The problem is, being out just reminds me of all that I don't have. I am not twisting myself into the ground, but I know these are true realities. Even just being in a car and for a time being surrounded by trees and pastures, until the freeway has to be used, is bittersweet. I don't drive and I don't get out very often. So I guess I am just really sad while I still remember I had a nice time. I almost don't like going out in lovely surroundings. If I am at home, I feel better protected. Right now I feel fragile.
  22. All I have to add is that when I was in the hospital a couple of years ago, on Friday's and Saturday's we could choose a movie to watch. There was a young woman there who I just adored from the first day. I was an anxious fool and lost contact with her after a small group of us met up after our stints in the behavioral health unit ( love that ..lol ). Anyway, maybe 6 of the 10 of us in there were gonna watch a movie so we were in charge of choosing. We both howled when we saw up near the top of the list...What About Bob. Our choice was made for us. Being in that setting and watching that movie was pure gold. As you were.
  23. No, there is no cure. Do you have a therapist, or someone similar, where you could dig into why you keep yourself in this kind of situation. You can continue making this only about him, but you are trying to figure out a puzzle where the two of you possess different pieces and instructions. You have the power to stop this ride, no matter that there are some good things that happen. You will not get what you want and need from this person. That doesn't make either of you wrong. Can you just be someone who says hi now and then ? Believing that if we are not always there for someone means they will experience great feelings of abandonment, etc, is many times a case where we need more. We project ourselves onto others and try and stamp down our vulnerabilities by making it more about another person. Have you ever thought, when you are not thinking about all this and what words were said and how often, and what might they mean, that your relationship with this guy has some co-dependent characteristics ?
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