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Gigarock's Achievements


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  1. Yeah Im going to get my lisence before spring. I already told myself my next check Im going to pay the fee and try for my driving knowledge test. I actually do enjoy the job I have now but I mainly work alone at my desk. Im gonna be looking for another job this summer probably waitressing (what I used to do years ago) which is a great job to meet a lot of people.
  2. There is a counsler on my school campus I have been meaning to talk to since I started at my school a year ago. Maybe its time that I do that. Its hard to do things outside of school because school and work occupy 80% of my time. I really want to focus on getting my lisence first and foremost. There are a lot of things I want to accomplish this year but I lack a lot of motivation due to low self confidence. Its so hard to talk to my family about stuff like this because they are all hard headed and never really give me the support I need. Thank you both for your responses and taking the time to hear me out. Means a lot to me.
  3. I am using this post and forum as a reach for help in my situation. Most of the times when things get bad, I let them slide and try not to worry about them anymore but when its a never ending battle that you just cant win anymore, you know its time to take action. Anyways let me give you some insight as to why I am here and why I am writing this. I am a 25 year old female from Oregon and I absolutely hate my life. Sometimes I think where did I go wrong or why has my life come to this. I have no close friends here. None. No one that can call me or text me or say "hey lets hang out" Its really hard meeting people and connecting to someone the older you get. My best friend lives all the way in LA and its so hard not having her here with me. While I see other people going out with their friends enjoying their youth. Im stuck at home messing around on the computer or just hide myself in my room. I have no friends to where I can vent to them and tell them whats really going on with me. Sometimes I think Im a burden to them or they really dont like me so they never text or want to hang out. My family life is an absolute joke. My mother and I never get along. I still do live at home (which I hate) because I cannot afford to move out. My mom is the most negative, unhappy, moody, depressed person I ever known and Im worried some of her bad energy has rubbed off on me too much. There is no way around that woman. We NEVER get along but when we do things are good. I wish we can get along all of the time but thats not the case. I barely can even speak with her because she will find something to snap at me about. She picks on me constantly. I have gained over 60 pounds these past couple of years due to my depression and a job I had that was constantly bringing me down. I used to be the skinny, pretty girl in my family, now I feel everyone looks at me in absolute disgust. My mom constantly tells me I need to loose weight and get my life in order...like its so easy to do, maybe for some people it is but for me its not. She doesnt realize how much of what she says brings me down and makes me feel worse then I already do. When I tell her to stop saying what she says to me, she yells and tells me its for my own good. I know there is something bothering her too (I feel like shes bipolar btw) she needs help just as much as I do. I do love my mom so much and love everything she has done for me, but why does she have to be so mean most of the time? I never understand it. My dad and I are cool but he's more of a friend then a parent and in some ways Im okay with that. I have two older sisters and as much as I love them, they are just as hard on me like my mother is. My oldest sister has issues with depression and I feel like when she takes stuff out of me, she needs to look at herself and not be so judgement, plus she has a horrible temper that can drive any sane person insane. My other sister Im not as close to as I used to be, probably because she is married and pregnent and is too busy with life, which is fine by me. There really is not much to say about her. I stay home most of the time and hate it. I hate being stuck to my room. I dont even have a drivers lisence and I dont know why I still dont. The only thing I have going for me is I am a straight A college student. I do love school and feel its the only thing going good in my life. I put all of my energy into school and my schoolwork cuz its the only thing going good for me. I would like to get my lisence and loose weight this year but I am lacking motivation because I am so unhappy. My anxiety is through the roof and I dont know how I can get help. If you are reading this, the thought that you took time out of your day to read this and hear me out means so much to me. Any advice or thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
  4. Thank you! You as well :)

  5. I hope you had a fantastic day :)

  6. Im at a loss for words and really dont know how to express myself and my struggles with depression as of now, seeing that I just joined this forum. I just wanted to say hello to all and know we are all here to help one another. My best wishes to you all.
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