Camellia

@UserNotFound Im sorry you hv anger issues. Im sorry I dont hv anything to help you. But i can relate with that uncomfortable feeling. I dont trust people in real life. I always feel unsafe whenever Im out there. I dont know how to overcome this either. Whenever I go to sleep, I hope I never wake up, so that I dont hv to face the world again. You are not alone. We are here with you.

Im glad u hv a potential new female friend. I hope everything goes well with her.

Thank you Evergreen for the advise. I feel exactly the same, I feel I can never win. I dont know what to achieve either. And the voice is always there whispering. If Im not working, I hv the music or tv ON non stop. It helps to divert. Any silence moment, the whisper will get stronger.

For me, when I sleep at night, and tomorrow morning I find out that Im still alive. Every night when I sleep, I want to die in my sleep.

I dont know how it feels to like ourselves. I really dont know. I confused a lot. I dont know how to describe it here.

Im sorry you are having this problem. I have exactly or almost the same problem like you do with my mum and my siblings. I can relate to you. Im outcasted and the blacksheep of the family too. Im sorry you are not able to move out from there. I rented a room because that was the only thing I can afford to do at that time. I was desperate to leave my family's house. That was the first step that I do to survive. I hope you are able to find ways to get away from there.

I can relate to you. I have the same problem. I am alone in the family. We are here with you.

@Charlee I can relate to almost everything you've said. When we are at this stage, dont know what to do anymore and not much hope left, its so easy to do it (to end it). Stay with us. I may not be able to help a lot, but Im here to share your feelings. Hopefully it can help to enlighten you with that feelings. That feeling is painfull indeed.

@Charlee Im sorry u are feeling down. I hv no advise. But i just want you to know that i hear you and i understand how difficult it is to feel this way. You are not alone. We are here with you.

@DragonBallZ1995 Im sorry u hv this problem. Is it possible for you to find another job and move out from there. I hv family problem too. Im the black sheep of the family. Im not close to my mum either. To make the story short, i got a job in another city. I rented a room in the city. A family (not my family) in the city had advertised to rent out one of their rooms. Thats how i got away from family. Like you, i hv nobody with me.

@AndrewH Im sorry you feel this way. I dont hv any advise. But I just want you to know that you are not alone. Im feeling almost exactly the same thing like you do. I was ok for the past hours today but suddenly it changed to feeling depress. I wanted to do few things but suddenly I feel down, feeling low. I dont want to do anything. I dont know why.

Im glad that you intend to go back to see a psychiatrist. I understand the busy schedule of the psychiatrist because of the pandemic. Do you hv a place that provide support through phone calls for depression. Maybe they can help you. You can also meet them at their office, but they are not psychiatrist.

I can relate to this, dont feel right. I hv this feeling quite often. I dont know what to do either. I would normally come here to DF and read people's posts. It helps me.

Yr welcome. I hope you will get another job soon. Less stressful job with good pay.

Im sorry to hear this....you hv been there for so long... Where will u go after this...