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lonelyforeigner

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lonelyforeigner last won the day on January 16

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About lonelyforeigner

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  1. lonelyforeigner

    How Do You Feel Right Now #10

    Fat... I gained 15 lbs in the past 2 months. I gotta get my emotional eating under control...
  2. lonelyforeigner

    I Hate Myself

    There's a lot of them like Anastasia or LoveMe (aka a Foreign Affair). I have two relatives who met women from Anastasia Their relationships didn't last though. I also had a guy at work who married an Asian woman who really took him to the cleaners the second she got her permanent residency. It wasn't a surprise to anyone though, he was 30 years older than her and not exactly attractive. I guess it can work for some people if they are self-aware enough to know what kind of woman would be interested in them and not just their money or visa. They should really question the woman's motivation if it's the kind of woman who wouldn't even talk to them in their home country, lol.
  3. Doesn't sound like withdrawals to me to be honest, I suspect that it's just your old depression and anxiety making a comeback. Just because one drug works does not mean that others will work, it's always a matter of trial and error. May want to give it another month and if the reoccurring symptoms don't go away you might have to try something else. I hear you about the excessive sweating part being annoying. I have hyperhidrosis despite not being on any meds. All it takes is climbing a set of stairs, walking briskly for more than a couple of minutes, or the sun shining on me and I'll sweat like I just finished a hard workout. Doesn't even matter what the temperature is, it can be freezing outside and I'll still sweat like a pig... It's beyond embarrassing and gross.
  4. lonelyforeigner

    Favorite Cartoon Character(s) 8-]]

    There were some awesome European ones too: The Adventures of Tintin, Lucky Luke, Asterix
  5. lonelyforeigner

    Favorite Cartoon Character(s) 8-]]

    Road Runner pissed me off... I was always rooting for Wile, lol.
  6. lonelyforeigner

    Favorite Cartoon Character(s) 8-]]

    Nope, you're not the only one. Saturday mornings were awesome as a child of the 80s... All the awesome Disney, Hanna-Barbera and WB cartoons. Other things I watched a lot were He-Man, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Inspector Gadget, Smurfs, Fraggle Rock and the Muppet Show. Damn, I was a TV junkie...
  7. lonelyforeigner

    working

    I've used online therapy in the past and liked it. The only drawback is the lack of nonverbal communication which can make it harder for your therapist to get the full picture.
  8. lonelyforeigner

    working

    Are you also seeing a therapist? Unless the depression is 100% based on biological factors it's generally beneficial to also get some talk therapy. Regarding work: there's really only so much you can do, for the most part you just have to live with the fact that you can no longer perform as well as before. It's good that you have the luxury of taking time off without having to worry about getting fired, some years ago I lost absolutely everything because I ignored my mental health and kept trying to push myself. It's not worth it, learn to listen to the signs and take the time off when you need it.
  9. lonelyforeigner

    Health anxiety out of control

    Well said. As long as your doctor is aware of all the meds you are taking the risk is minimal. Whatever you do, DO NOT Google drug interactions, you will almost always find some rare interactions and then your health anxiety will run with that and give you new symptoms and fears. If you're super worried about two drugs interacting go see a pharmacist and ask them, they can tell you if there are any serious risks. Amen! When I struggled with health anxiety my body would always produce the results I expected to see. If my HR was >125 I'd start worrying about a panic attack and would measure it every few minutes and guess what, without fail it would go up to 140 and on bad days 160 and above until I finally did get a panic attack or would fall asleep from exhaustion. If my HR was on the low side then it would do the exact opposite. Don't underestimate how much anxiety can influence your cardiovascular system, it's pointless to measure your HR/BP unless you're perfectly calm. One thing that finally convinced me that my heart was normal was getting a smart watch with a built-in HR tracker. My "normal" HR is 90 - 110 (still have some minor anxiety issues) but when I looked at the logs I saw that during my sleep it was in the healthy 50 - 70 range. As a last resort you may want to consider going inpatient for a week or two to let them adjust all your meds in a controller and safe environment. My anxiety ended up getting so bad that I was unable to perform my work properly and resulted in me losing my job. Don't let it get that far.
  10. lonelyforeigner

    Health anxiety out of control

    Why not start taking Valium again? Seems like your anxiety is getting way out of hand. Give yourself a break and then discuss how to best discontinue it with your doctor. Perhaps they can prescribe you a non-benzo anxiolytic such as BuSpar or Vistaril to help mitigate the heightened anxiety you're experiencing when stopping Valium. I don't recall whether or not you're seeing a therapist but it may be helpful to explore different anxiety management techniques. PS: Don't worry about a heart attack, you wouldn't be sitting in front of your computer if you were having one. Probably just a minor allergic reaction or soreness from the needle.
  11. lonelyforeigner

    Dating

    Ouch I'm not saying it can't work for average or ugly people but they need a thick skin, that's why I wouldn't recommend it for someone with low self-esteem. At the end of the day it's a number's game. Same in real life too but you can better gauge the other person's level of interest before approaching so the rejections are more avoidable. Good to hear that it worked out for your friends! You can even be too pretty for online dating. If a woman is very attractive some guys will think it's a fake profile or that she's just looking for validation so despite being interested they won't contact her. Unless it's Tinder, lol
  12. lonelyforeigner

    Dating

    Just out of curiosity, is that friend female or male? It's an entirely different experience. Pretty much all my average looking male acquaintances gave up on it and ended up meeting women through friends or work. Though I admit it may be a matter of age since they're all in their 30s and 40s.
  13. lonelyforeigner

    Going out - Not bad, not bad at all

    That's awesome! Sounds like you have some really cool neighbors at your new place
  14. lonelyforeigner

    Dating

    Stay away from online dating unless you're very good looking, it's super competitive and if you're average or below-average it'll most definitely crush your remaining self-esteem. I haven't had any success dating but one thing I learned from trying to meet women when I was younger is to hide your depression, at least initially. Nothing will make them run for the hills like admitting that you're suffering from it, even when they have depression themselves. There's still a very strong societal expectation for men to be strong, vulnerability generally isn't viewed as sexy. Just speaking to the general population, there are always exceptions but they're hard to find. Once someone likes you enough you can bring up your issues, at that point they're more likely to overlook it. Just be sure not to fall into the trap of treating them like a therapist, so many stories on here of partners despairing because the depressed person takes everything out on them. Low self-esteem is a bit more difficult to hide... It's very hard to convince someone that you're the best match for them when you don't believe in yourself. I guess there isn't much you can do other than what @Atra already suggested, get some really nice outfits to make the best of your appearance. This can also include hitting the gym, a guy with a bit of muscles is automatically perceived as more confident than someone scrawny or chubby.
  15. lonelyforeigner

    TA's "What's On Your Mind Right Now?" Thread, Part 2

    Perhaps you should get a female therapist so you don't develop feelings... In my experience they seem to struggle relating to men but I am sure there are some awesome ones too if you take the time to look for one.
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