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dappydave85

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Posts posted by dappydave85


  1. I believe it's caused by a heightened sensitivity to the energies around us. If we sense nagativity, this can cause us to become sad. That's how I feel, but It's also what I'm picking up from most peoples descriptions

    I too feel lonely and it's not a good feeling. When I'm at work, I put on my mask, but when I leave, the real me comes out. My best friend and I have been friends for 16 years and even though she knows everything about me and vice-versa, I can't help but think that she's sick of me telling her the same old thing. I feel like a broken record and no matter how much I want to repair it, I can't. It's too broken to even try. I feel like there is a dark cloud looming over me at all times. I can't get away from it. Going to my parents house is like torture for me. I love both of my parents but I can't help but feel uncomfortable, scared and lonely. My mind constantly drifts to a place where there are no dark clouds. I want so much for this feeling to go away but I feel stuck. I cry about everything. When I want to confront my sisters for the things they have done to me, I can't. I feel like my voice is stuck in my throat and the only thing I do is to cry. I cry because I'm angry, depressed, and lonely. No matter how much my mother tells me that she's there for me, I can't bring myself to tell her how I really feel. I'm even crying typing this and I have a meeting in 25 minutes!

    Yes. Sometimes I'm filled with heartbreak because I don't want to "overuse" my closest friends. I've had some tell me that they're sick of hearing me repeat myself all the time. So I confide in people that I'm less close to, and sometimes they use it against me. That's a pretty disgusting feeling. Yesterday I had to leave class because I felt overwhelmingly sad. I went to the bathroom to cry, and came back with red eyes I'm sure. The worst part: I don't even know what was wrong or what triggered it. I feel you sister.


  2. Perhaps is because we disconnect from reality, because of how traumatised we become be seeing the world as it is

    I too feel lonely and it's not a good feeling. When I'm at work, I put on my mask, but when I leave, the real me comes out. My best friend and I have been friends for 16 years and even though she knows everything about me and vice-versa, I can't help but think that she's sick of me telling her the same old thing. I feel like a broken record and no matter how much I want to repair it, I can't. It's too broken to even try. I feel like there is a dark cloud looming over me at all times. I can't get away from it. Going to my parents house is like torture for me. I love both of my parents but I can't help but feel uncomfortable, scared and lonely. My mind constantly drifts to a place where there are no dark clouds. I want so much for this feeling to go away but I feel stuck. I cry about everything. When I want to confront my sisters for the things they have done to me, I can't. I feel like my voice is stuck in my throat and the only thing I do is to cry. I cry because I'm angry, depressed, and lonely. No matter how much my mother tells me that she's there for me, I can't bring myself to tell her how I really feel. I'm even crying typing this and I have a meeting in 25 minutes!


  3. I readsome information recently, that this mask is just the ego. In legal terms, it is known as a person. But could be applied in scoiety. For example: a 'person' working in a shop "a sales rep" and a 'person' buying an item 'a customer'. You become the role. "You are a customer". But that only applies to the ego and it's not your true self.

    I too feel lonely and it's not a good feeling. When I'm at work, I put on my mask, but when I leave, the real me comes out. My best friend and I have been friends for 16 years and even though she knows everything about me and vice-versa, I can't help but think that she's sick of me telling her the same old thing. I feel like a broken record and no matter how much I want to repair it, I can't. It's too broken to even try. I feel like there is a dark cloud looming over me at all times. I can't get away from it. Going to my parents house is like torture for me. I love both of my parents but I can't help but feel uncomfortable, scared and lonely. My mind constantly drifts to a place where there are no dark clouds. I want so much for this feeling to go away but I feel stuck. I cry about everything. When I want to confront my sisters for the things they have done to me, I can't. I feel like my voice is stuck in my throat and the only thing I do is to cry. I cry because I'm angry, depressed, and lonely. No matter how much my mother tells me that she's there for me, I can't bring myself to tell her how I really feel. I'm even crying typing this and I have a meeting in 25 minutes!


  4. The only thing that will make me happy is for the ssuffering and destruction to cease in thw world and we live together, forever as one peaceful race.

    Oh man. I know what you mean. I feel like if I confide my overwhelming numbness and inability to be happy to my friends, then they will reject me or trivialize my feelings. Sometimes they confirm my fears, but more often they just hold me and talk to me. I feel like a spoiled brat, but sometimes I still feel alone, and when they leave it's just the same as before. Sometimes, even if they stay with me, I can't even register the pleasure of their hugs and their touch, which is the scariest feeling in the world. Today was the worst. I was walking through campus this morning and again tonight, crying my eyes out, because I couldn't think of ANYTHING that would make me happy. People passing by didn't even look up, didn't even care, even though I was having all these suicidal thoughts. Nobody even acknowledged my existence, let alone smiled or looked concerned. My thoughts, "they wouldn't really even care if I was dead". I feel like such a selfish spoiled brat. I don't even know why I'm posting this. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm always lonely. I get where you're coming from. You are not alone in your loneliness. I'm not happy at that, but I feel less alone now.


  5. Yeah I get that so much. Like most people are just characters in a movie, persons. I see of lot of emptines in people, but a full soul on some (mostly other depressed people)

    Feeling lonely is one of my most debilitating problems. Even when I am around people I feel lonely, like I am outside of a bubble the rest of the world is in.

    I feel similar- like I'm a captive audience watching a long, long movie.


  6. i just think it's crazy how there are all these people online with these problems, but when im out in the world, especially the weekends, people look like they don't have a care in the world, and i'm the only person with a problem. where are all of these people who are like me?

    Hi Dappydave85,

    These people are all around. You just don't always see it. People from all walks of life suffer with depression. Teachers, lawyers, doctors, and so on. Depression also varies in severity. Someone can be depressed and you not know it. I'm able to function fairly well when my depression is light. Everyone think I'm just fine because I'm able to mask the depression until it progresses. When it is severe, I isolate from everyone because I don't want anyone to be burden with me even though they want to support me. So don't be fool. They are everywhere.

    I suppose you are right. Most depression though seems to loss driven, grievance. Depression of the ego. (Loss of job, or spouse, is both of the ego).


  7. a mask hiding the underlying sadness, a mask I believe makes things worse

    i just think it's crazy how there are all these people online with these problems, but when im out in the world, especially the weekends, people look like they don't have a care in the world, and i'm the only person with a problem. where are all of these people who are like me?

    even the happiest looking person can be depressed, the care free look is just a front but whats underneath is far from care free. you'd be suprised how many people actually do this


  8. We are generally in our bedrooms, our houses, or hidden away somewhere. It's the simpletons that go out without a care in the world

    i just think it's crazy how there are all these people online with these problems, but when im out in the world, especially the weekends, people look like they don't have a care in the world, and i'm the only person with a problem. where are all of these people who are like me?

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