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Everything posted by Steveab63

  1. Its a shame you couldnt have gotten help way sooner than you did, and more of it. I came from an abusive home too, but all of mine was emotional. Kind of the same result though. The only difference is that my passion is/was taking things apart and fixing them, so I've always had a job, but i worry that could change at any moment. I hope you can keep up the strength to get help so that you can get the things you want and deserve. We guys from the 60's are a stubborn bunch. Keep at it.
  2. Its all good. Im on the other end of the spectrum... Being non religious. I try to bite my tongue too when that subject comes up. I just feel badly for people who expect god to fix everything for them, as opposed to working on their own problems. I realize "god helps those who help themselves" isnt really in the bible, but the sentiment is accurate none the less.
  3. I tried all kinds of meds, and none alone worked... the only thing that did work was the combination. Ive heard lots of people say they were feeling ok so they quit the meds, or they got worried about too many so dropped one. It can take years to find what works. Why mess with it once you do? I understand trying to get rid of bad side effects, esp sexual ones, but if a substitute doesnt work, i think id go back to what works.
  4. Im sorry some people are unreasonable. You have done nothing wrong.
  5. So despite my prodding people here to go out into the world and do something besides sit around being depressed, I've done exactly that all weekend. 3 cheers for hypocrisy. My excuse yesterday was a migraine, today is just stupidity. (Sigh)
  6. Sorry youre having such a rough time. many of us have varying degrees of the things you describe, so we kind of get it. Its too bad the MAOI's didn't keep working. I hope the new treatment is helpful. Steve.
  7. If you changed that to: joy comes from helping others, then youd be working with something tangible. Im not religious, so feel free to ignore, but..if your just praying for your problems to disappear with no work on your part, i think thats a recipe for failure. Youd be much better off learning everything you can about your condition, reading books, going to therapy and meetings, and going out into the world and mingling with people. Taking meds if prescribed too. Personally i have no use for religion. My mom thought she was dying of cancer because she didnt believe strongly enough. Really? This is helpful? No thanks, i have enough failings in life and standards to try and live up to.
  8. Assuming she knows about your depression, she's probably just trying to help. She doesnt know what to do, but shes trying. Maybe you should try too. There is a bit of mind over matter here...try to ignore your problems for a couple of hours. Go out with her and fake it till you make it. Maybe by accident, youll enjoy something. Little chance of that if you just sit where you're at. I wallowed in the depths of hell sitting in my room for months after my dad died. Id still be there if i never got up and out of there.
  9. This stress sucks. Had a nasty headache all day yesterday. Woke up at 3am with my mind manufacturing scenarios of bad things that will happen. Was awake over an hour trying to think of calming thoughts, that kept working their way back to something bad. I think i finally fell asleep agian after 4am. Then i woke at sun up and I'm getting a headache again. My brain really hates me.
  10. Well you obviously hit a nerve with her. Shes either done it or had it done to her. That doesnt make your opinion any less valid, nor does it make her attacking you right. But people are imperfect people, and you never know when an explosive mix will occur. Dont beat yourself up, you did nothing wrong. And dont forget the other person also has 'issues'.
  11. It sounds like youve done remarkably well keeping a positive outlook, with all of the challenges youve been through. Im sorry it has become increasingly difficult. If your mom is abusive, you need to minimize interaction with her. Many people struggle with mixed feelings between 'loving' a parent, (which is unresonably forgiving in cases where the parent is abusive), and staying away from them. I too feel better at work, or doing activities that keep my mind occupied. I have to keep busy. I hope you can find a way to keep the demons out of your head so you can continue forward.
  12. So here's a thought. Totally unqualified, and fully throw outable. Were/are you one of those kids whose parents gave you everything you wanted, told you life was beautiful and fair, shielded you from everything bad in the world? Are you now P.O'd that the world isnt anything like that? If so i dont know what to tell you. It just isnt that way. If not, you have to what the rest of us do, keep trying to do what feels good and helps, and accept that your brain has some wires crossed and move on. Its like being mad about some other physical attribute, you got what you got, and you cant trade it in for something else. Sorry, no magic cure i know of.
  13. Ahh, that explains it. Sorry he reacts this way, but again, youve done nothing wrong.
  14. Boy can i relate to that. I can always almost reach it, but not quite. Just close enoughto be torture. Name a subject...everything. But i have "not good enough" written on my forhead anyway. Next to the big "L".
  15. Some more experienced doctors will also try combinations of meds. That was the only thing that worked well for me.
  16. Be patient wth the meds, it can take a few weeks to get used to them, and for their effects to take hold. Oh, and Welcome.
  17. Sorry you had that experience. Unless you were threatening to hurt youself or others, the therapist is not supposed to break confidentiality. Ive been to a couple of therapists that should have been in a different kind of job. Some arent good. Sorry you ended up with one. Gotta get back on that horse though. Good luck. Steve
  18. Denial is a wonderful thing, bit its effects are fleeting and unpredictable. Depending on the severity of your depression, you may be forced to deal with it. Here is a good place to get started. Steve
  19. Well, i dont know how close a friend he is based on how he treated you. Maybe you thought more of him, than him of you. Plus youve stood up for yourself and have taken the high road all along, so you have nothing to be ashamed of in that respect. Unless its just buddies fooling around, and busting each other's balls, and you misunderstanding that, maybe he's just an uncaring jerk. If the latter, i doubt you can control that. Like i said, yove done nothing wrong. Steve
  20. Sorry, some people are just selfish. Others are chaotic. Sounds like you have one of each.
  21. Sorry you're having a rough time. Wish our brains had an off switch sometimes. i woke up in the middle of the night panicking about some imagined scenario that probably will not happen, but it kept me from getting a good night's sleep. Been exhausted all day. try to hang in there. try to get out and do something fun. Steve
  22. You may be assuming all issues are you, and he is perfect, when the reality is that he may have his own issues. Sometimes yours and his issues work with each other, sometimes against. Thats what makes human interactions so volitile. Speaking for myself, im not a morning person. So if my wife talks to me early in the morning, i probably wont register what she is saying. Many times she tells me i was supposed to bring home some grocery, and i have no recollection she even spoke to me.
  23. Exactly. Force youself to go out into the world. You already know what the inside of your living space looks like, go see something different. Who knows, you might make a friend, see a puppy, or a pretty sunset...something cool. Steve
  24. Yes, i think thats why people without a mate thinking having one will fix everything, but im married and thats not the case. Though my S.O. is no stranger to depression and the like, i dont necessarily want to tell her how pathetic i really am inside.
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