Tim 52

Windsurfer: You are the one who will know the best. Given that you doing well and that your primary symptoms are under control, bi-weekly makes sense (every other week, right?) Depending on how busy your therapist is, I've found it helps to schedule ahead several weeks. It is easier to cancel than it is to get an appointment with a busy therapist. Tim

JessieJake: I'm no doctor. But I will reply. Most anti-depressants a person is weaned off of. I do know that prozac has a long half life in our bodies so for many it is one of the few drugs a doctor might have you come off of with no tapering. In an earlier post you mention trying an anti-anxiety medicine but it wasn't helpful. Many doctors will prescribe an anti-anxiety medicine like clonezapam when one is starting an anti-depressant as a way to manage the start up anxiety. Tim

JessieJake: All the feelings you are describing make perfect sense as you try to manage the anxiety and start a new medicine. When prozac works it can be very, very helpful for both depression and anxiety. Unfortunately, it can, as you know, take awhile to work. When I've started on the class of medicine that includes prozac (SSRI's) I did have an increase in anxiety. It lasted for about two weeks and then I started feeling some of the positive affects. If you can, try not to worry right now about weight gain. For many of us, the gain is minimal or not at all. And there are ways to manage it if that does happen. When do you see the doctor next? And is the doctor a primary care physician or a psychiatrist, if you don't mind me asking? I wish the best for you. Tim

Toughfighter: It is so very difficult to manage social anxiety disorder. I can imagine that it is frustrating. Please be gentle with yourself. I'm not sure there are many people that are gifted with starting conversations with new people. I wish I had magic advice for you. I wonder how a therapist who specializes in social anxiety would coach you. Wishing you the best. Tim

Countryman: I'm not in the same situation. i just want you to know that I read your post and I can understand how things are in shambles for you right now. You are in a difficult situation. Tim

All these important questions about meaning and life. Blueskys you are a careful and thorough thinker. I don't think depression is a punishment thought it feels like one. Tim

Nathassia Welcome to DF. I hope you feel like you can share what's going on in your life here. I know that has helped me. At the very least, it has helped me feel less alone. Best to you , Tim

A few people still: Just think happy thoughts and surround yourself with positive people. Me: Tell that to my brain chemistry.

Mike: It is difficult when the depression starts to sneak back. Ugh. I'm sorry you are experiencing this. I'm glad you posted and i hope you have the opportunity to make use of other support like docs and/or therapist to nip this in the bud. Best, Tim

mmd Loneliness is real and no fun. I'm sorry for the silence that you are experience. Being alone is draining in its own upside down backwards way. Keep posting here. Folks will respond. Tim

I'm not a doctor (in any way ). But I do know there are many anti-anxiety meds that can be helpful. Perhaps your body adapts to this medicine too quickly. There are other medicines in the same class and sometimes anti-depressants are used for anxiety too. I hope you can have a conversation with this about your doctor. It is so upsetting to feel such high degrees of anxiety. I'm sorry you are going through this. I do think a conversation with your doctor might yield a medicine that works better for you.

Thanks for sharing your story. You have alot going on. And the choices that are in front of you are not easy ones to make decisions about. And you are not in any way a monster. Nope. No way. You are facing tough struggles. I wish I could be more helpful. Just now that i read your post carefully and have "heard" you. Tim

Morgan: You are so very articulate about what you are going through. You have been through many struggles. I admire the way you have drawn boundaries and worked hard to make a highly functional life for yourself. Well done. Really. I think that you have inner resources that will help you get through the pregnancy. I wonder if there are ways to expand your support network. You deserve healthy support during the next several months. Tim

agonyme: OCD is so very difficult. And I'm sorry you are dealing with it. Plus, I"m sorry you are having to deal with it by yourself. That must be so hard. You deserve some relief from the symptoms. I've been helped by medicines. I know that you didn't get good results from a SSRI. Have you tried more than one? Do you have a physician that understands anxiety? If so I would talk with him/her about other kinds of medicines that might help. A medicine called Klonopin has helped me. It can be addicting though it hasn't been for me. My advice, I imagine, isn't that helpful. But I want you to know I read your post and I do understand the pain of OCD. It is real and it can hurt so bad. Tim

SailingSoul: First, congratulations on your school accomplishments. Well done. This represents alot of hard work. I wish your family was more supportive. Your family does not show care for you in a way that is supportive. This must be draining and I can see why you would feel depressed or sad or lonely (or all three). I hope that you find the support you deserve. Tim

I"m a middle child both in family of origin and a step family.

Chumly: I certainly understand why you would feel rejected. And I can also tell you that it is not you. I don't know if the guy is a creep or not (it sounds a little creepy), but he does at the least sound like one you could not trust. That's his stuff. Not yours. Tim

Keeping calm is easier said than done, isn't it? Sometimes deep breathing exercises helps me.

So glad you posted. I'm sorry you are struggling. And sometimes it sounds like you have to fake it so others don't worry. That must be hard. How can we help?

Hi Sentinel2 I was interested in your clear description of what you are experiencing. This all sounds very difficult. I am not a MD so I am in no way qualified to comment on a diagnosis for you. However, I have generalized anxiety and it involves a heightened sense of anxiousness about any number of things. Sometimes the anxiety is warranted (having to make a difficult personnel decision at work), sometimes it is not (being anxious meeting people new to me). My GAD has been treated sometimes more effectively than at other times with conversations with trusted friends and advisors, therapy, and various meds. I hope your life is a little less like hell today. And keep this conversation going as long as it is helpful to you. I hope you receive other responses. Tim

Saprkzz: This sounds like a very difficult road to travel. Understatement. I'm sorry you have experienced such a struggle. It is unnecessary suffering, by which I mean you did nothing to deserve it and it isn't like you need to learn some life lesson. When symptoms go on for so long (at least for me) it signaled that there is a genetic and brain chemistry component to all this rather than exclusively some untapped personality or character issue. You mention counseling. Have you tried medications? I'm assuming you have but wanted to ask. You must feel very alone at times. I'm glad you posted on DF. Tim

Lost Soul: Severe depression is so very hard. Really. I have trouble regulating my eating sometimes. So, I hear you. Wishing you the best, Tim

manicdepressive: You are very articulate describing what you are experiencing. You are trying some new things. Reason to hope. Keep us posted. Or keep this topic moving along with how you are doing. Wishing you the best Tim

Welcome to DF. Suffering from depression, I do understand the symptoms you are describing. It feels like one is coming apart from the inside out. You are experiencing alot of transitions right now. That can't help but increase your stress. You mention sharing this with a doctor or doctors. Have you ever talked with a doctor about anxiety or depression meds?

Herntreez: You are going through alot. And I'm so sorry you are experiencing soul deep depression. Of course, the tragedy was not, not, not your fault. Awful things happen in this life. They just happen. Please make your own decision, but I'd be hesitant about a neurofeedback approach to depression. I'm not sure that it is evidence based. I'd encourage you to find a licensed therapist and psychiatrist trained in treating depression and post traumatic stress disorder. I wonder if Toronto has a local Canadian Mental Health Association that could assist you in finding the best match of care. Tim