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  1. Thank you very much. I hope your's was just as fulfilling. My thoughts are with you all at the DF community =)

  2. I hope you had a fantastic day :)

  3. I can say music is my life. I'am a would-be producer of it, but sadly can't convey what I want to produce in my music, atleast currently at this time. I'am a fan of all genre's of music and never discriminate, or atleast try not to for it :P Anything that is energetic, Dance, Soulful, Classic, basically anything that doesnt just convey one sine tone :P
  4. You are here, that is one thing to see yourself look at, and take as another positive step. I can feel for you and understand in a certain way any feelings after going through counselling, that the feeling of no help given, but more so taken comes into effect. It takes time for anyone to divulge information, and even more so to explain it in full. I hope you know that by being here, we are here to listen, and will always be here for when you are wanting to seek any help.
  5. Well you should first ask yourself what is it that you are trying to understand? Are you saying from what you have seen and experienced of people, they can be sick and tired and not depressed, but then there are also people that are feeling the same way albeit in a different light with their depression? In any case I hope myself, or any of us here on DF can further help you find some answers :)
  6. Well what I currently would like to change about myself, is to be a more acceptant person towards my ownself. I hope by achieveing this will then inturn not create any falseness that I feel I show of myself in everyday life. Progress towards this goal is somewhat tenuous at best. But I take everyday one step at a time. One foot infront of the other as they say. What about you guys?
  7. Saimi


    I have always with my depression, skipped or thought lack of it being necessary to shower. But in the end noticed due to my own self recognition to atleast shower once in awhile. And that mostly only now consists of cold showers which only temporarily puts my mind off how I'am feeling.
  8. Saimi


    Currently at the time of writing this I had just awoken from a deep slumber from a dream. When I wake up from one I'am sure to try to write it down, whereas in the past I never really took notice to anything I had dreamt. I have also noticed that recently my dreams have become more frequent in nature, and the one I had today had the same theme of stating things about my past as yesterday's one had. All but todays one also still had a stranger I had met in the past which I had dreamt yesterday of. But of course this 'stranger' (and by stranger, I mean someone I had just bumped into on the street sometime ago and only exchanged very brief words of no importance. Or maybe they were?) in todays dream, was completely shown to me in a new event and different light, and only appeared to me at the very end, of a cycle of dreams that had again appeared to me with the same context of things about my past. I was left with a voice saying 'When are you going to understand?' I then went to investigate what I had heard in the hallway of my house only to awaken to a silent house. Now often (as I'm sure everyone is) I'm left with the question of what does it mean. But its not often my subconcious outright bluntly gives me the direct question. Quoting from what you said, I competely agree with this, although I had never looked at it this way before. One thing I do know is my reality is unchanging, but my thoughts are. I do want my reality to change, but I can't believe or make it so, and thus is apart of my depression. Maybe the question given to me in my dream ment that, when am I going to understand I can change my reality? Thanks for all your posts so far guys, It means alot to me, and I hope as much to you guys too. Very interesting discussion so far, keep those dreams coming! :P
  9. And if you do dream, how often? What are they about? (Or what are the most recent ones you can remember currently in time.) And most importantly what do they mean to you? Or if you are one to not dream at all I still would like your thoughts on what they mean to you. For me a dream is your subconscious telling back to you events that it has recorded down, and which shows it in such a hidden way, it can then convey many meanings. But all of which really only one of them can have any meaning to you. It's what makes them so shrowded in mystery, and a puzzle to try and better understand them, that makes it just one step further to trying to better understand ourselves. Sigmund Freud has said on the subject in his book The Interpretation of Dreams, that 'There is a psychological technique which makes it possible to interpret dreams, and that on the application of this technique, every dream will reveal itself as a psychological structure, full of significance, and one which may be assigned to a specific place in the psychic activities of the waking state.' That following passage and more about him can be found on Wikipedia, the library, and other resources :P However I would like discussion on what your dreams are, what they were (if you can remember), and what they mean to you.
  10. Well first off, the 1st step to happiness is to learn, there is no real steps to happiness, It is more like a journey that one must go through to fully be aware of oneself and achieve such a goal, and it can't be fully and properly explained proverbially either. the 2nd step to happiness, is to loose that worry and fear of anyone knowing you on a forum and/or in any other way. There is never anything to worry about :) As you can see alot of people post here too :P I too have had Suicidal thoughts of my mind seeing no possible way out of how I felt, or how I could even achieve to feel better. One thing we both know from you stating then, is that we are also at the same time scared to die. Whether it be the repercussions of our actions afterwards that keeps us so worried, or not knowing what there truely is after death. One thing I have learnt is its best to leave this world happy and fullfilled. But it can't be achieved until we ourselves are happy and believe we have led a good life. Well I find the first step to getting past something that has traumatized us, is to speak to someone you feel towards about what it is that has traumatized you. I feel that it helps me either get an opinion, insight, or another view of the matter which is much better than trying to bottle it up :( Feel free to message myself anytime, and know that we are all here to listen and help :)
  11. And if you could, how do you think it would alter what those choices have made you as a person today? For better or worse. I understand there are more than two sides to people on this subject. People who either wish they could of done something differently, or those that are more of the realist, and then there are those that just take life as it comes. Whatever side of the boat your on, I would like to see all point of views and discussions for your own thoughts. I personally believe, the choices I have made in the past no matter how good or bad, Is what has made me the person I'am today. And they are the building blocks from which I learn without regret.
  12. From what you first asked of the question, how to handle or feel the way a friend would feel towards your own depression, really should matter in the way in which you first met that person. What made you connect and know each other? What brought your friendship along? Depression should only come into account for you, If you truly can't find a ways and means for your own question and understandings of why you felt the way you did in the first place. I'am further sorry in hearing your depression, but am glad you are as open as I have been in my own experience of depression. Any further questions you have said or asked, I hope we can all be here for you in future troubles that may cross your path. Feel free to contact me personally or anyone that is willing anytime :) (And I'm guessing everyone is :P)
  13. I have felt in the past some-what the same way, although in trying to identify all the answers for one-self, it has also brought about much self reflection on my own part (Which with trying to identify my own depression, I knew would either make or break me (and with which no-one turns out the victor). What makes you, you, is whatever you, yourself makes out of your own situation. No-one can give you any one straight answer, but we can hopefully be here to provide our own self experiences, thoughts, knowledge, and feelings that will hopefully contribute and better ourselves for the future. There is many a aspiring quote that we can learn from, it just matters to us the way we look at it :)
  14. I'm sorry to hear that, although am thankful in hearing what it means to you. Always with feelings of despair, you must always know, hope is not lost. Only does it happen, when you think or see in your own mind that your wish for feeling better may never be fulfilled. I can also say that is another thing we have in common, and by all of us posting here, I hope we can support each other :) I don't know what to say, but to thank this forum for the support it gives me as much as I'm said to be giving, aswell as thanking you for the courage and support that you have further given me in your own post. From what you have also said, us all being here together to try and propel ourselves forward, should be a goal for all of us :) I also thank you for your continued support and encouragement in the feelings I have expressed in my own experience. As to respond for what I have said myself in my own post, I'am not only here to try and better understand my own self without giving the true intentions of the feelings I have felt (whether they be in the past or not). But to try and better learn from what I have experienced, aswell as with learning with others. I do hope I can be of use to anyone that asks of it from me, and hopefully continue threads that may further be insightful to anyone.
  15. Thanks for the thoughtful response, Symora. I am a sensitive person, I think, but in real life I can seem rather unemotional because I don't like to express my feelings around people. They're private. But more than that, I'm afraid of people judging me. I do have a tendency to be very critical of myself, and since I have self-esteem issues I frequently feel that I give myself nothing more than I deserve, that perhaps I'm not even being as harsh as I should. Everything is just a bit muddled. I don't know if I'm this way because of depression or not. I find what you say about your sister very interesting. It gives me some perspective from which to examine things, and she sounds like a lovely person. First of all I would like to say, thank you all for opening up and sharing your own thoughts, feelings, and lives. It has helped myself alot to read and understand from all of our perspectives on depression. You are not alone AngelOfTheMoor, it is hard to label our thoughts and feelings the way we do, on just a single word. But I'm sure we all have in common some sort of the symptoms. I hope we can all benefit and find some comfort and/or continued knowledge in what we share, and help each other along the way :)
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