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About Lare45

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  1. Thanks I've been through so many AD medications. I had good results with MAOIs but I became allergic to one and the one I liked the most was discontinued by the manufacturer. He may elect to continue me on Buproprion but 200 SR twice a day and have me discontinue caffeine 100%. He strongly believes that caffeine has ruined many an attempt at Bupropion. I drink one cup a day which he wanted me to work on stopping. I thought the ill effects might be due to Buproprion being a reuptake inhibitor of norepinephrine but I am not a pharmacologist nor a psychiatrist and my speculations are based on very limited knowledge as a lay person. I'll let him make the call.
  2. I have been afraid to write in words what currently most depresses me. It's almost if I write it, it will happen. In the past it was fear of ending up in the streets, fear of being fired, getting fired, being a poor professional. Now it's the reality that I will loss the one person I've been afraid of losing since childhood and the grief will destroy me.
  3. Well the increase up to 300 didn't work well. It's odd that I only increased it last Sunday and I estimated it had been a week and a half. I called my p-doc and described the racy feelings, the heightened anxiety and the lack of a decrease in depression. I have to work all day tomorrow interacting with people and I am fearful that I will not be able to do well having the side effects I have been experiencing.. I asked him by voice mail if I could lower the dose to 200 mg. His secretary called me and related his message: Lower The Dose. I am no stranger to anxiety and I know these current symptoms are not typical of any anxiety I normally have. They feel like when I took Adderall years and had this constant sense of impending doom which led to a quick discontinuation after discussing it my p-doc of the time.. I am meeting him with Thursday. I know of three people who really like the medication. I am not sure if any are as anxious as I always have been. I know one person well and she has never had an anxiety problem. I'd like to be one of the many people who really have benefited from the medication but I may be out of luck.
  4. Thank you all for your welcoming statements. Good thing there is a limit on how many times I can use one of the buttons to express myself. I need to express myself in a post rather pushing a button. On an another site I found it more anxiety-provoking to post and usually just pushed the like button and rarely communicated my thoughts but I always knew I was being avoidant. I have the feeling right now I am taking too much space and time. From early childhood on I had social anxiety and in late adolescence panic disorder with agoraphobia. My depressive episodes came considerably later in life. I suspect that if I had not been hobbled by anxiety so early in life I would never have been so beset by depression but I have other issues that I am sure contributed. (I have tried CBT therapy twice for the anxiety but I it was not helpful.)
  5. Anxious about relations with neighbors, whether I've done enough to repair my mother's PC, and catching up with work from home rather than procrastinating. I guess the last dose of Bupropion is wearing off. In reality I am interested in improving relations with neighbors, we are hardly in a state of war; the PC has a hardware problem that may be irreparable, and I have a few days to get the rest of back paper work done. But that's logical analysis and not how I feel. The decision today to increase the dose of Bupropion to 300 resulted in a major decrease in depression. I've been in a dreadful depressive spiral so anxious or not I'm very grateful to have had one day when I haven't felt a complete failure in life, doomed to die homeless, full of self-contempt etc, etc.
  6. I actually first signed up in 2008. 2007-2010 were dreadful years. I guess I was too shy to actually post. I drifted away from this site. I regret not having posted. My first major depressive episode occurred in mid-life in 2004. I was able to control it through a prescription of Parnate and the Nardil. Those ceased to options by 2007 I have been able to escape the ones that followed either through medication or changed circumstances. I have used Clonazepam for my panic disorder for many years but it had no impact on my depressive episodes. And now considerably older I have returned seeking help with my current depressive episode. I am now taking Wellbutrin (Bupropion) and really wanted to read what others had to say about the medication. And I posted in the forum. I am happy to be participating although I certainly never wanted so much depression and anxiety through so many years that I would feel it necessary.
  7. I am just starting today to move up from 200 mg SR twice a day to 300 mg SR a day. I went a whole month taking only 100 mg with no real impact; then 100 mg in the morning, 100 mg in the afternoon again with no real change. I realized that many people seem to use a higher dose. My P-Doc left it up to me to increase it 300 mg a day if necessary. My depression is deepening due to situational factors and I really need something to work for me. I think 200mg SR may have been too weak a dose. I took the two 100 mgs this morning and the third 100 mg in the afternoon. I will be seeing my P-Doc this week.
  8. I hope you had a fantastic day :)

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