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Moody Blues

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Everything posted by Moody Blues

  1. I enjoy Facebook and interacting with other people, takes my mind off of me. If you saw my account, you would think I was happy as a clam. It reminds me that I do have good things in my life and I like to share them.
  2. Here's another FYI http://www.opacity.us/site23_pilgrim_state_hospital.htm
  3. http://www.studentpulse.com/articles/283/2/the-history-of-mental-illness-from-skull-drills-to-happy-pillsI just did a little research about treating the mentally ill in past years,
  4. I don't know how they were treated. Back then, there were no meds for depression and people were institutionalized. There were 3 major mental institutions within a 15 mile radius of where I live. One is still partially open and that's where I did my psych rotation for nursing. I know terrible things were done to the mentally ill, ECT with no medication, lobotomies and other barbaric treatments. My grandmother tried to commit suicide back in the 1930's, she was sent to an institution for a period of time and released. She didn't receive any major treatment and went on with her life without incident.
  5. Hello tiredone and welcome. You write very well and I have no problem understanding you. Sometimes, one situation can set off a negative mental response that stays with us. I'm not a professional, but I think some of us are predisposed to depression/anxiety. It appears out of thin air and we don't understand it, but we can recall the situation when it started. Sometimes we think it's the event that caused the depression, when in fact the depression was going to rear it's ugly head at some point in our lives. This is exactly what happened to me. I went through a divorce in my twenties and boom, I was overwhelmed with depression and anxiety. I thought it was situational and would go away, but 20 yrs. later, I'm still suffering. I now realise the situation didn't "cause" my problems, it just brought them to the surface. Sooner or later these feelings were going to come out. I have a family history of mental illness and as I look back, there were signs of it when I was younger. I didn't understand that some of my thoughts, we're not normal back then. Maybe it would be helpful to talk with someone and find out what is causing your depression and anger issues.
  6. Hi Joanne, I've been to several therapists and not one of them seemed to help. I feel they're just not getting how severe my anxiety/depression is. I also think I have a form of Body Dysmorphic Disorder and everyone I talk to, seems to blow it off. I'm tired of pouring my heart out to therapists, only to have them teach me deep breathing exercises!
  7. I'm also 52 and have had terrible things done to me at work. It's difficult not to be bitter, but you can't let other people change who you are.
  8. I believe in god, but I have my own faith. I was raised catholic, but disagree with a lot of what I've been taught :uh-uh: .
  9. Great letter! Unfortunately, people who haven't experienced what we have. can't understand it. I wish for every negative comment I received, I could put that person in my head for a week, They would never make a rude, sarcastic comment again. You need to learn how to ignore ignorant people, they don't have a clue about how much we suffer..
  10. I'm so tired of stopping one med and trying another, for me it's a roller coaster ride. I never know how the new med is going to make me feel. Not only that, but the withdrawal from the old med is awful. To be honest, I'm just tired of being medicated! The only med that I take and really works, is Klonopin. All the anti depression drugs do nothing for me and I have tried many. I'm wondering if I have more then depression/anxiety, since nothing seems to work (we're talking 20yrs,). Are there tests for other mental conditions? I'm wondering if I could be Bipolar, or something else that would be treated with a different type of medication.
  11. I was only taking 30mg of Cymbalta. It was great for the anxiety, but made me so depressed. I take Klonopin 1 mg prn for anxiety, but really struggle with depression. I have an appt. next week with my pdoc, but I feel I'm being over medicated. I'm tired of trying all these meds and feeling like crap. I'm currently on Paxil 40mgs Nefedezone 200mgs Klonopin 1mg prn Cymbalta 30mgs This is just way too much medication.
  12. Hi peony, I can totally relate to what you're feeling.I came to the conclusion that I can't change the world so I have to change myself. I don't take things personally and try to surround myself with the good people in this world. I'm very cautious as who I let into my life. Ive been burned many times, but refused to turn into the type of person I despise. Good people have a tendency to get hurt by others, who take advantage of them. But are also rewarded by attracting other good people into their life. The rotten people eventually get what they deserve, I've watched it happen time and time again. There are many kind hearted, caring people around, you just have to figure out who they are. Keep an open mind and figure out what kind of person you're dealing with.
  13. Hi Joe, I went through the same thing when my first marriage ended. I was devastated and kept obsessing about my ex everyday. My heart ached and I just couldn't handle the pain, actually that's when my mental stability went down the drain. Unfortunately it takes time to get over a broken heart. I know you're hurting, but you have to move on with your life. Try to keep your mind busy, go out with friends and do things you enjoy. Eventually the pain will lessen and you'll be ready to date.again. My divorce was a "blessing in disguise". I went from a man who only cared about himself, to a wonderful guy who treats me like a queen. 20 years later, we are still happily married. You may not feel like dating now, but you will in the future. Just give yourself time to grieve the loss of your marriage.
  14. The first week on Cymbalta was great, no anxiety or depression. Second week, I started feeling a bit depressed but no anxiety. The next few days were horrible. I sank into this terrible, over whelming depression. I was crying all day and could barely get out of bed. I stopped taking Cymbalta, the depression was so bad it was scaring me, My anxiety is back, but at least my depression is tolerable. Anyone ever have this kind of reaction?
  15. Hello Mustang, Mental illness is very difficult to understand and deal with. Bottom line, is you have been there for your wife. You're only human and it's normal to feel resentment and anger. I have a story that maybe you can relate to. My grandmother was diagnosed with terminal stomach cancer and she wanted to stay with my mom. Everyday my mother would take care of her, with a six hour break when the aide came by. After a couple of months, it started to take it's toll on my mom. She started to feel very guilty, because she was beginning to resent my grandmother for being sick. My mom was not only physically drained, but the emotional strain was overwhelming her. My mom and I would talk for hours about this and I told her she was doing the very best she could. Eventually my grandmother passed and for over 25 yrs, my mother had feelings of guilt. I saw what my mother did for my grandmother and to be honest, I don't think I could have done it. Bottom line is, you do the best you can and realise you can't fix everything. Your feelings are normal, given the situation you're in.
  16. Hello Red and welcome. It does sound like you may be experiencing some depression, I applaude you for recognizing it and seeking help. As Fire stated, we are here for you and please feel free to discuss your feelings and thoughts about anything.
  17. Hey Char, We've all been there with relationships and have made poor decisions. Sometimes it just feels "comfortable" to fall back into something that's familiar. Don't beat yourself up over it! The right guy will come along and you'll be that much wiser.
  18. I do believe a situation can cause your anxiety to morph into a panic attack, it has happened to me. If your mind is already stressed with anxiety, adding more can cause your brain to go into overload. If your anxiety is situational. it should decrease as time goes by.
  19. I also believe in life after death, but can anybody be sure of that? I've seen many people die and I have to say, the peacefulness that surrounds them is amazing. I do believe we go to a better place.
  20. Anaphylaxis is one thing you don't play around with. Your girlfriend needs to understand this is life threatening allergy. Working in the healthcare field, I have witnessed how severe an allergic reaction can be. I was treating a young man who was stung by a bee, the allergy was so severe, he was dying right in front of my eyes. We had to intubate and shoot him up with epi, he had stopped breathing. Your situation is a life or death situation, you can never be too paranoid.
  21. Hello, I have the same thoughts which create an overwhelming panic. I work as an RN/Paramedic and have witnessed awful things. For me, it's not so much dying itself, it's what will I have to go through before I die. This has been going on for years. Recently I lost my mother and this event triggered a massive ongoing panic attack. Death has become very real to me and I can't stop thinking about it. The loss of my mother was so traumatic, I still haven't come to terms with it. I feel like something can happen to me or my loved ones at anytime and I obsess over it. I'm in a constant state of panic waiting for the "other shoe to drop". I've been to numerous therapists, but I can't find one who understands my problem. At this point, I try to stay busy and focus on other things, keeping my mind busy really seems to help. I've tried numerous medications and the only one that helps a little is Klonopin. I know how difficult it is to gets these thought out of your head!
  22. I have three horses, that can lift me out of my depression in a heartbeat. I see them on a daily basis and they can always make me smile. They love attention and are very affectionate towards me, it's the one joy I have left in my life.
  23. Hello Alone and welcome to the boards. I can relate to what you're feeling, I've had depression/anxiety for many years. I can tell you depression creates terrible thoughts and feelings, it takes control of your mind and you feel out of control. The lose of your mother, probably have made things worse ( it did for me). I don't know where you live, but is there some way you can get help? I think speaking with a therapist could be beneficial, he/she can help you put your thoughts in proper perspective. I know the hell you speak of I've been there so long, I don't know what "feeling normal" is like. You are not alone, may of us has experienced similar feelings. There has to be a way for you to get professional help, even though you don't have insurance. In the mean time, I hope you continue to post and seek advice from the members of this forum.
  24. If you're receiving looks in person, your pic may not be doing you justice. It takes so much more then a pic to start a relationship. Maybe stop the online dating and go out and meet real people. Real interaction allows people to see your personality, sense of humor and overall physical appearance.I've met men from a picture and found them much more attractive in person.
  25. Thanks for your kind words!
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