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Blog Comments posted by surfcaster

  1. 7 minutes ago, Nightjar said:

    ...I'm sure that talking about it could be a release in a way...maybe enable some emotions to purge...And if our story is accepted and we are loved unconditionally then that would be the ultimate healing...

    Its a rare thing though, the unconditional love. Do therapists have it? Nah. Very rare.

    ..Fellow survivors are more likely to have that acceptance and empathy in my opinion...But slowly, slowly, like you say. Make sure.

    Ignore all advice as appropriate 🤷

    Thanks nightjar, as you stated peple in similar circumstances know us more then anyone else. None of it was shared for the reasons you mentioned and i think my therapist will be the only one for a while, then maybe group, we will see.

    Thanks for your sincere support 

  2. 29 minutes ago, Nightjar said:

    Thankyou for sharing this surfcaster....I knew that we had things in common......turns out it was parental abuse.

    You didn't deserve that abuse and I'm so happy you found your lovely wife.


    50 minutes ago, sober4life said:

    We have very similar stories.  Basically everyone that ever reads what you just posted is rooting for you.  They want love to win.  They want the angel to win.  ❤️

    I guess it's time after all these years to talk about it and stop holding it in, I'm still thinking i should spare my wife the horrors though, I'm going to open up this conversation with my therapist who persistantly dug after in futility, maybe group night not sure though, that might take a while, question is though do you think after all this time it will even matter. Or is it better left buried. 

  3. Drug pusher, err ahh i mean Psych doc this morning did his regular schpeel,  swapped out 1 med for another and sent me on my way. Now on my way to therapist to get my mind examined and prodded,  shouldn't say that, she helped me a lot before actually, anyway,  that's me

  4. so i opened the door in therapy and she didn't waste any time stepping through and getting to the long ago set in stone stuff, things i stopped talking to myself about, things i didn't ever want to go over again, thank god she knows to hold back when she sees it getting rough,  she asked me if it would be easier for me to write it all down and bring it in some day for her to read as opposed to me trying to verbalize it all, she said sometimes that's easier because she can get to it in round about ways that would make it easier for me, but i don't know

  5. why did i release long held secrets about me that only i knew, how can i ever be comfortable with my wife again now that she knows i am not the person she thought i was or can ever be again, i'm a fraud, a fake, just a great big untruth, there's no way to undo this and i'm so confused right now

  6. I'm sorry, ya,ll are great, didnt want it to sound like i was minimizing you're problems, i just feel like i go on about it too much and like in my world people don't want to keep hearing about it, probably not true but it's still how i feel, cant unlearn a lifetime of keep that crap to yourself comments,

    Anyway in an hour it's off to therapy and i still don't know what im gonna share

  7. keep plugging away and don't ever give up, it will work out, I went from a failed attempt and years of severe depression to being fairly well and go days without thinking about being depressed or sad , stay strong, if your docs and therapist are not helping make a change until you find ones who do help

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