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Posts posted by monicott17

  1. On 3/5/2022 at 1:02 PM, sober4life said:

    I found a second dog that quacks like a duck yesterday like my old dog so I think that's what I'll say when I go to my 25 year graduation reunion.  Maybe that's all I'll say.  What have you been doing since you left school?  Trying to find dogs that quack.

    25 year reunion for me as well. I still live in the area where my high school is and have seen classmates around town over the years. Didn’t go to the 10 year reunion and won’t go to this one for sure.  I didn’t realize it myself until someone pointed it out to me recently and damn, was it sobering for me. My high school and college years were by no means great but since then I have gone steadily downhill and would consider things to be an unmitigated disaster at this point.

  2. On 3/3/2022 at 6:40 PM, duck said:

    You can ask me anything about meds.  I will do my best to answer.   I have been on meds for about 27 years.  Some of them are okay while others were not. 

    Thanks for the reply. Due to my hesitiation, my therapist suggested possibly being on something that isn’t taken daily…only when needed. He’s also mentioned Prozac as a possibility. I’ve heard both good and bad in regards to Prozac.

  3. 23 hours ago, sober4life said:

    I'm honestly not sure where it's going.  I don't think anyone is sure.  Of course we should worry about it.  I honestly believe there will be a time when the world gets back to normal and by normal I mean what it was like before covid.  When?  I don't know but I have to keep the faith that one day we will be able to wake up to something that we at least don't have to rush to the tv every morning screaming oh my god what is going on now?  I desperately hope that!

    This is one of the big things I am struggling with right now. Worried about where things are headed. I am deeply disturbed by a number of things happening right now and the ramifications they are having and will continue to have. I am (and have always been to be honest) a “glass half empty” person and I believe the world that exsisted prior to March of 2020 is never coming back, especially where I live. Some places might be close to a pre-covid way of living, not where I am though.

  4. On 3/3/2022 at 5:58 PM, Extremebeginner said:

    I was in the same position, wasnt sure whether to take meds or not. I tried, wasn’t successful so I stopped. Couldn’t handle the depression on my own, passed by several therapists, but then suffered severe anxiety. I decided to take a benzodiazepine after consulting my doctor. It worked well, was worried about addiction so reconsidered other meds. Not sure if they worked or not to be honest but I’m still around so I guess they did. 
    long term effects may be bad but honestly when you look at the food we buy, it has most of the ingredients in it already, so after trying high serotonin diets and activities I decided to go all in. I’m still here, and still have rough, really rough days, but I also have not quite so rough days.

    thats my experience, I Guess it doesnt help you make your decision so I’m sorry about that aspect of my response.

    Thanks. I am just about there and going to have the discussion with my therapist sooner than later. I think I will always be apprehensive about it because of my cynical nature but I am worse than I have ever been and struggle to function most days…especially at my job.

  5. Was listening to the radio today and the host was talking about his favorite pastime and hobbies which he enjoys to get away from the news and social media. And people were calling in with their own as well. Not sure which I felt more…sad or envious. I just don’t have the patience, skill or desire for it but I wish I did as I am consumed with bad/sad/negative thoughts and have almost no joy or pleasure in life any longer. Even eating out, something I used to enjoy doesn’t do it for me any longer.

  6. I am not much of a tv or movie fan and I have no hobbies or social life so distracting myself from my screwed up head is really tough. I do get some relief from just merely opening a window (especially while I am working) and letting fresh air in or going outside for a brief time. Also, it probably isn’t healthy or good but I daydream. A lot. 

  7. 19 hours ago, duck said:

    So sorry to hear.    It sucks when we are not feeling well and work is difficult.   Can you talk to your doctor and see if medication or a change in medication helps a bit?  

    Thanks. I am only doing therapy at this point and no meds at this time. My therapist has left the decision up to me and both he and the practice do not push them in any way. But these last few weeks, we have discussed the possibility of them more and he explained to me how they handle it. I have always been on the fence about meds…past attempts did not work for me. But I am at the point (and this has been another tough week) where I can’t take much more and have to at least give them a try.

    I wish I had someone in real life to give a little support and discuss this with but I really don’t have anyone who understands so I will have to decide this on my own.

  8. In a really bad place right now and I have no idea how to get out of it. I have been struggling for awhile with my job but now have actually fallen behind and this week I am on a deadline…yet I still don’t care and can’t find any motivation. Today off to a slow start already and only going to go downhill from here I am afraid. 

  9. 4 hours ago, Nightjar said:

    I'm sure we all envy someone in our lifetime for one reason or another. Personally I tend to envy people who have been cherished and supported. I've always done everything alone 🤷‍♀️ I also envy people who have stable lives... But I can see the positives to my crazy, freewheeling life a lot of the time too 😁

    For me, I mostly envy people who can do “normal” things without a second thought. Work, driving, chores, hygiene, even something as simple as ordering off of a menu. I struggle with it all and sometimes can’t even do it. My big envy though is those with friends, especially those who have had a lifelong best friend or close friend they can turn to at any time without being judged or ridiculed.

  10. 11 hours ago, iWantRope said:

    Just…f**** work.

    Is it bad that I envy peoples who are paid enough moneys to live on despite them not working full-time?

    I hear you. So fed up with it all. At one point, I actually cared about my job. Those days are long gone and the apathy is here to stay.

  11. 5 hours ago, Floor2017 said:

    Hopefully, with a lot of coffee 😊 your day will get better. I hate to hear that you are not sleeping or resting well. Have you tried comforting instrumental music to help you to relax?

    Thanks. Somehow managed to power through. Coffee plus working from home was probably the reason. Not sure I could have done it if I was still working in the office and had to commute…especially because bad weather (possibly ice)was in the forecast.

    I have not tried music and meditation but both have been recommended to me by my therapist.  My sleep aid…and has been that for years and years is a loud fan…several in fact. All year round, even in the coldest part of winter. I even take them with me on vacation..can’t be without them.

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